Why successful men are jerks: no one wants to do the laundry

Why is it the case that success and selfishness so often seem to go together in men? The answer is simple: men don't really want to romance women. When they are unable to provide the lifestyle and provision for which women typically select, men adopt romantic consideration as a kind of virtuous necessity in the service of their goals. However, once they become successful, they believe that they should be able to dispense with the courtship drudgery they never wanted to do in the first place. This is why successful men are jerks.

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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #dating #men

[psychacks]

Why is it the case that success and selfishness so often seem to go together in men? The answer is simple: men don't really want to romance women. When they are unable to provide the lifestyle and provision for which women typically select, men adopt romantic consideration as a kind of virtuous necessity in the service of their goals. However, once they become successful, they believe that they should be able to dispense with the courtship drudgery they never wanted to do in the first place. This is why successful men are jerks.

Buy my book, "The Value of Others"

Book a paid consultation:


Social Media




Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community:

Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com

Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #dating #men

[YellowToucan]

Think about it in reverse. Do you know a very attractive woman who jumps to cook, clean, or do your laundry men? Of course you don't. The more attractive a woman is the less likely she'll do those things. The same with men. The more successful a man is, the less he's likely to cater to her whims/desires.

"Why successful men are jerks and attractive women are boring/lifeless/nuts" - because they can afford to be.

[jakejakobz]

Women like flowers but reallyyyy like not paying rent had me rolling on the floor.

[SpencerCornelia]

this is the kind of sociology that needs to be taught to young men in schools

[chrisandrews]

The irony with flowers is that they're only truly well received if she's already so attracted to you that you needn't have bothered. Otherwise they just come off as try hard/ supplicating.

[ryanh]

Prior to my 30’s I was just an average nobody, in my mid-30’s I sold my start-up. In many ways my life had improved dramatically but I think of your interview on Soft White Underbelly “I wish I was not an astronomer when the stars come out, ” in how I view women. From my perspective you see through all of the talk and realize what they truly are. They’re not evil, malicious, or malevolent; they’re just functionally children in adult bodies.

[minutes]

Love this channel because of the delivery. No redpill rage, no off topic rambling, no lambo in the background, just a perspective that makes sense if you're willing to listen delivered in less than 10 minutes.

[MichiganSandman]

It’s amazing the amount of lying that goes on in society to keep it moving. If you figure it out you’ll be surrounded by few people

[Spider]

This man is saying the quiet part out loud. He is speaking the good word!

[debbiieesmiles]

My son is 9, but best believe Im gonna sit his ass down and make him watch all your videos when he gets older .

[CheggBoy-qioc]

I think many successful people also have had so many moments during their come up when they were humiliated, embarrassing moments, and went through so many struggles. At the top they end up realising that it’s just a bunch of fakes. Ones that didn’t actually put the work in. The ones that laughed now want to rub elbows with you. They become stand offish

[thomasdee]

The one thing he forgot to mention is that a lot of people (both men and women) learn the wrong lesson. If you are successful, people will put up with you being an asshole as the challenges of dealing with you are more than compensated by the benefits to them for having to deal with you. That is why a lot of famous people are massive assholes. A lot of people get this backward and see someone who is an asshole getting what they want and assume that if they replicate this behaviour (but not the success), they too will get what they want and are bitterly disappointed.

[stephanewilfriededing]

We are not jerks... We have boundaries and we enforce them. That's just the way it is.

[armorbearer]

It makes sense. Successful men know they are highly desirable and will leverage their position.

[k.alvarado]

Being very attractive does the same thing as well as having money.

[ashutoshsinghparihar]

You are absolutely right.
More and more i climb the success ladder in my field, the less and less i have to be romantic ..

[oscarreygadas]

We don't LOVE to bring flowers, but most of us do enjoy to bring them occasionaly. Men love to share their resources with others, specially when we are appreciated.

[TheONEX]

I was a lifelong romantic and have been what many would consider successful throughout the years. I no longer romance women, however, because it only opened me up to exploitation and abuse. Very little reciprocation as well. Additionally, most women seem to prefer the asshole anyway, and would often misinterpret my soft side as weakness. This way, by not caring too much about what women think, everyone gets what they want.

[xsliquidity]

Ahh the old song & dance... called a date. Where are my flowers?? I left them back at my place... let's go get them!! 😂

[msfubby]

One thing i have learnt about relationships so far is that women do not like to do the things men love, while men do not like to do the things women love. Or i can say are not naturally inclined to do these.
Therefore the trick to a long lasting relationship is for both sides to go out of their way and love the other how they want to be loved, and not how it feels comfortable