I Moved House! (It's Worse!)

Life sucks, I know

[steveneardley]

This sounds like where I moved into an apartment, thinking it was okay, to find that there was a flamenco dance studio upstairs (I am NOT kidding), and a heavy metal guy underneath me. I had to simply give up on the living room, and lived in the bedroom, which was reasonably quiet, outside of the train going through my backyard and shaking the whole house every night at 2:00 AM. I got used to the train, but not the human noises, because they were so unpredictable.

[dancecommando]

Take lots of pictures of the state of the house, you might need it for when you move out one day. In theory the insects and rats should be dealt with by your letting agency/landlord, I would inform them of the problem

Hope it gets better xx

[duetschesandpoppy]

Large plastic clear totes for all of your stuff. Other than that... Everything will be all right. Probably not today, or tomorrow. But one day, I promise, everything will be ok. The sun will shine even if it fucking rains. And I'm so sorry it's raining buckets on you now. Everything will be ok.

[olivierf]

Sorry to hear about all this and obviously no need to apologize.
Good luck for dealing with it all, I hope it all gets better soon enough.

[Scarygothgirl]

Moving house is really stressful at the best of times, it sounds like it's really hard on you right now. Please try to be kind to yourself, creating a sense of routine and familiar sensory experiences can be useful when everything around you is unfamiliar and out of control x

[CrzyLady]

Some suggestions:
- Noise: perhaps Loops or Flares (ear plugs) to offer some relief without going full noise cancelling.
- Washing machine: have you considered rental appliances? No big up front cost, if/when you move you don't have to take it or sell it, you just end the rental.
- Desk: would something hinged that folds away when not in use work? IKEA has a wall mounted table that functions as a slim shelf when folded down.
- Rat: multi-feed (pet safe) baits can sometimes come in pellets (maybe fit between grating), and while a dead rat in the wall is also gross, a living one is definitely worse (and more actively stressful)
- Roaches: we get lots here in Aus, and there are pest treatments that create a barrier to stop them entering the house (this is yearly here, and a requirement of rental agreements)

This is a lot to deal with though, so maybe one thing at a time, and definitely ask your roommates to engage in the solutions too 🤗

[jordanleewalker]

You're not alone with new home problems, Dana. I moved into my place over a year ago and it was infested with mites, which I've managed to get under control for the most part (with frequent vacuuming and cleaning) but I still see them. :/ I'm terrified of them. They've been in every house so far. I was hoping to escape them. My heart SANK when I saw them here.

[roxanes]

So sorry to hear about the move-in disaster and hoping the fixes happen really fast! Be well.

[simonedutch]

Crickey Dana this sounds absolutely horrific! I don't know how you are managing to string words together, you must be so exhausted, and together with having meltdowns on top of everything I felt so sorry for you and I'm praying that things get much better really fast. I find you so inspiring and I'm sending you so much love. XX

[eschient]

Hey Dana, just some advice from an old - keep in mind that it will take several weeks for NT people to adjust to the stresses of moving. It's always a lot more stress than it seems it will be and it's always a machine gunning of things one on top of the other when we're already past our limit. That's just how it tends to go. It's no wonder it's going to be harder for people like us. Keep giving yourself grace and tackle one small thing at a time to give yourself those footholds that allow you to make adjustments and re-establish yourself. Know that this is "normal" in that things just never go smoothly for anyone in these situations and try not to let yourself spiral into thinking this was a huge, unfixable mistake that will never get better and this is just your life forever. You have someone with you, so remember that you're a team in this and keep touching base with each other about how you're both doing and what you each can take on or need taken off your plates. Sometimes that's going to be both of you needing to throw your plates against the wall and not deal with anything for a day or so, sometimes things are going to be stilted - just keep checking in and being honest so it doesn't stay that way.

As a side note, roaches are fricking awful - and tenacious! Open packages outside, they love cardboard and can hitch rides in Amazon boxes and the like. Don't slack off on the baits and stuff just because you stop seeing them. From the sounds of it, it's just going to be a part of life there like it is here. Vary the types of baits every so often so they don't get immune or learn to avoid them. Pay particular attention to wet areas not just food areas - under kitchen sinks, drains, the bathroom, laundry room if you have one, your cats' dishes. Keep your pantry foods in airtight plastic containers, they can eat through most standard packaging. I even downsized my kitchen trash cans to bathroom sized {2 and 4 gallon} bins so the garbage can't stay in the house longer than a day.

[laura.bseyoga]

That sounds fucking awful! I'm really sorry you've moved somewhere like that & I hope your landlord fixes everything asap 💚 Really glad you've got your friend & Otis (& the other cat) to help keep you sane 😻

[merbst]

you go Dana!
That's a pretty kitty!

[Arithryka]

I moved a year ago and I've been pretty much fully useless since then, two weeks ain't bad! I hope your house/sanitation situation gets better, that stuff's nerve-wracking.

[krE]

Welcome back and may things get sorted asap.

[henriettajsoneskelin]

I feel terrible for you </3 Ugh, I would be completely stressed out/burnt out/in shutdown etc too, and so so grateful for at least be in i together with a friend. That's the upside. I hate that life is so unfair that you have to face these things while some a-holes out there are living in excess luxuary and deserving it way less as people... I'm in the middle of moving too and have a shitstorm of problems in relation to that too, but of a different kind. I feel panicky like all the time now, but you inspire me <3 Hope good things will come your way

[izzyonyoutuba]

I moved into an area / house that when I moved in was missing an entire window in the first week... I lasted only a few months trying to convince myself I could deal... but the energy it took to regulate to feel safe, clean, not anxious.. took its toll and I had to move.. Hope things work out okay, I understand your struggle

[xin]

Oh Dana I'm so sorry!! The noises thing really bothers me, the couple in the room next to me in my house share are really loud, they always have their TV on at full volume until midnight or 1am and back again at 6, regularly shout argue and are always making really irritating reptitive noises. I felt like such an ass for being annoyed so it's reassuring that other people deal with it, even if I wish you weren't!

[scarebears]

Heyyy I'm so sorry you're dealing with this shit. I'm low income too and have historically lived in a lot of very rough living situations. Lately ive been able to at least escape the abusive+generally unsafe situations that I had to contend with in the past but I've never been able to afford, like... you know! A nice quiet private home or anything. I'd love to own a home, it's like my dream, but I live in the us and am totally on my own financially. Shit is rough out here and I really feel you.

I've had pest issues too :[ I didn't used to have such a fear of bugs in the house but now I sure as hell do. I remember my last apartment-- I lived alone and that particular part was SO nice, but since it wasn't a very nice apartment building the walls were very thin and I lived underneath a couple who was up very early in the morning, like 4am. I had a lot of meltdowns as a result of thudding noises overhead after coming home from being overstimulated at work. I ended up dropping $300 on some noise canceling headphones that I basically never took off. ;-; housing is so fucking difficult especially when you don't have a ton of options. I'm sorry.

[Annenigmatic]

Does the rat have a way to get out? 🥺 Not only is immurement of a living creature morally horrific, but you REALLY don't want a dead rat in your walls! The smell will make living there truly unbearable for months! Got to let it out of there somehow, even if it's making a new hole and covering it up again.
I'm sorry you're having such a time of it. Moving is one of the hardest, most stressful things even when everything in the best of times 😵‍💫

[Copper]

I hope things will improve in your living situation ASAP. We had starlings in a rental wall once. Awful.