Married But In Love With Someone Else - Pt. 1

Torn Between Love and Marriage? Dr. Joe Beam Offers a Lifeline!

Is your marriage on the rocks because you've developed feelings for someone else? You're not alone, but this situation can be devastating if not handled carefully. In this video, Dr. Joe Beam dives deep to help BOTH you and your spouse navigate this painful betrayal.

Don't let fleeting infatuation destroy your family's future!

Here's what you'll learn:

Beyond the Initial Pain: Dr. Joe Beam offers guidance for you and your spouse to cope with the emotional fallout.

Saving Your Marriage: Learn practical steps to rebuild trust and reignite the love in your existing relationship.

Protecting Your Family: Consider the long-term consequences of your actions. Don't let your present desires cause lasting damage to your children and loved ones.

Think before you act! Watch now and get the tools you need to make the best decision for your marriage and your family.

If you're feeling stuck, we can help! Learn more about our Marriage Helper Workshops, Coaching, and Online Courses:

Want 20% off your first month of your Save My Marriage membership?
Click the link and apply code "YOUTUBE" at checkout!

0:00 Introduction
0:02 MARRIED BUT IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE?
0:06 I KNOW HOW THAT FEELS
0:34 NO ONE UNDERSTANDS
1:03 THIS PERSON COMPLETES ME
2:03 4 POTENTIAL PATHS
2:09 2 RESULTS
2:19 STAY IN YOUR MARRIAGE KEEP HAVING THE AFFAIR
2:25 THAT PLAN IS DOOMED
2:38 THAT WON'T LAST FOREVER
2:59 LEAVE YOUR MARRIAGE FOR THE AFFAIR PARTNER
3:08 YOU CHOOSE TO END THE AFFAIR
3:42 WAIT FOR SPOUSE TO END YOUR MARRIAGE
4:47 YOU MAKE BAD DECISIONS
5:20 I THOUGHT IN SHORT TERM CONSEQUENCES
6:06 YOU STOP THINKING ABOUT TOMORROW
6:24 WHAT ABOUT LONG TERM CONSEQUENCES?
7:02 THE EFFECT ON YOUR SPOUSE
7:24 DIVISION OF INCOME
7:52 SOCIAL & FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
8:50 I COULDN'T GIVE THEM WHAT THEY NEEDED
9:19 SHE WOULD BECOME THE "OTHER" WOMAN
9:36 IT WAS ALL ABOUT ME
10:20 IT AFFECTS YOUR FUTURE
10:42 THINK ABOUT YOUR LEGACY
11:02 DIVORCE STILL AFFECTS MY FAMILY
11:30 TELL US YOUR STORY
12:11 IT IS POSSIBLE
12:31 WE WANT TO HELP YOU
12:55 CONSIDER THE LONG-TERM AFFECTS

[MarriageHelper]

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[dreamb]

"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone” originated with Robin Williams.

[belindaalderson]

My ex husband went with his lover, so grateful he did. We are still on friendly terms, and I think the world of his now wife. The other day I actually told her that he was lucky to have her. My children think that it's great that we all get along and understand that we really weren't that suited. I am looking for love, hopefully I find it too but I don't resent their happiness.

[victorlevivalenciano]

It’s sad to belong to someone else, when the right one comes along

[paulyn]

REgret of a dying man " I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me". We live only once in this world, why not live with the one you truly love. Happiness vs. misery

[danielsimpkins]

As someone who’s on the “being cheated on” end of a marriage ending, it’s the absolute worst feeling in the world. I still don’t feel like I’m living my own life. This has put me in such a deep depression, and her and I have a 4-year old son together. Nobody should ever have to go through the pain of the love of their life leaving them for somebody else.

[casinolover]

I just want to say that it takes a lot of courage for someone to admit that he or she had/has an affair. Thanks for your advise

[mrs.shauricehorton]

When you have an affair, you have already left your marriage. You have allowed 3 people to become apart of your marriage instead of 2.

[salishamohammed]

Sometimes we marry the wrong person, but then we eventually meet someone who seems to be right

[ahsan]

Why does that happen?
We meet wrong person at the right time and after that meet the right person at the wrong time...

[love_reka_]

You’re lucky that Alice loved you enough to take you back. God bless that strong woman

[victorkroud]

I’ve had more than one opportunity to consider walking away from my family for someone else, but both my parents had wanderlust, and I know how I felt about it as a child. I would never do to my children, or someone else’s, what my parents did to me. When I was “propositioned “ I only saw how much that person didn’t care about their own children, and I was determined not to be the one who destroyed their child’s life. If you think your behavior doesn’t effect your kids, think again.

[donnawoodford]

Anyone having an affair certainly isn't thinking about the spouse or the children.

[selfdiscoverysupport]

My parents stayed married for years in misery. In fact I begged them to separate so miserable was my home life for me and my sibling. They kept persisting for religous and moral beliefs. They finally divorced after I left college. My Dad remarried and at first it was upsetting but I'm actually happier for him to experience happiness at some point in life. I think in many cases we hold on rigidly to these beliefs when everything is pointing to how these beliefs are killing us inside. Because of clinging for decades to a toxic dead marriage my whole family was changed forever as people. If your marriage is wrong and youve gotten all the help you can I would say the lesson is to let it go. Dont divorce to jump into something else immediately. Divorce because you realise that the relationship and person are wrong and unhealthy for you.

[angelsamson]

Staying with someone you don’t love
Also effects your kids
They are bound to feel that energy
Also your teaching your kids that it’s ok to stay with someone for the sake of it
Isn’t it better to show your kids what true love is and not to just settle

[heartbeat]

In the medical profession you nailed it. In reality, every life and situation is different.Everyone has their own story, and suffering. Only that person knows the truth, and their reason and suffering. We can’t make people love one other if they don’t love each other 🙂🙂🙂

[lauragafer]

Life is too short to live with a person you dont love anymore. The best thing is to be honest and go for what you think is going to make you happy. If you fail, you learn the lesson and that is it.

[judys]

I've read some of the situations and comments below. Being judgemental of others relationship situations is bias and harmful. We all deserve to be loved and choose love according to our own beliefs.
Many a time people get married for reasons other than love...and one of those big reasons is fear of being alone. It's not a good reason, but it is one. Think, people bulid lives on that basis and think if the trickle effects it has on the others around it. Think of what it teaches the children that are produced in these loveless and affectionless marriages. We are human being that are imperfect. Growth comes from life lessons big or small. Love is imperfect and there are no hardlines anyone can draw that fits all.

[Reader]

Thing is the "love" feels great as long as you spend the quality moments with the lover and don't have to deal with the actual life situation...once you start living together, it will be the same as you have now!

[christinebunker]

Affairs often happen as your needs are not being met or being neglected or in some cases, ignored all together. The discussion of needs become arguments. As you continue it is human nature to accept and survive. Then suddenly someone made you laugh.... a laugh you forgot you had and then he/ she remembers the book you spoke about and it resonates that you're being heard. Through 5 minute snippets of interaction, you develop into a friendship then, possibly, a physical attraction. Now he or she is making you feel attractive, funny and intelligent again. Your brain runs with endorphins and clouds any negative judgment to that new person, you're just focusing on that beautiful drug like feeling.
You are not always with them as you both have separate lives but their good vibes continue through. It may even make your other half more interested in you again as you have become the main focus of your own life for a change.

Then the conflict. Lust vs love.

Love is learning to accept your partner even with their negative traits.
Lust is removing your ability to see the negative of a partner so love can be eventually replaced.
But not all relationships end in love. How many did you have to go through before you found the one?
When having an affair that develops feelings, you put a lot more pressure to make it work as you don't want your lies to be in vein.
Scientifically, you're screwed if your attentions are lustful. Like those living without human contact or sex yet crave it from their hubby or wife, will eventually find a connection that could ultimately test their loyalty.
However, human interaction is a beautiful, taken for granted thing in long term relationships. It is a cure for so much and if you do not get boosted up by your partner but you do by someone else, enjoy it. You deserve to be appreciated. However, know your limits. Respect that affairs have a sell by date.
Out of all the affairs I have witnessed, all husbands bar one, went back to their wife.