MALE AUTHORS BE LIKE #shorts

[BRITISH_AIRLINES_NO-FLY_LIST]

'Her name was Aurora Borialis, but people called her Abs for short. She was different, not like other girls. She had an appropriate amount of freckles and lavender gold eyes that shined like glitter. She would cut out pages of bibles to make paper swans and didn't care what people thought of her.' - Stanzi.

[Silliestfriend]

“She was called Aurora borealis, everyone called her abs, for short, she has a permanent disease that stopped her from growing body hair, but allowed her to grow eyebrows, curvy eyelashes and long beautiful hair” 💀

[cosygoose]

*meanwhile female authors writing a description of gays like they have never met one.

[faith]

hate to say it but this is also how straight millennial women write books as well😭

[ireallylikenuggets]

"Her skin was smooth, like chocolate.."

"White chocolate.."

[agame]

"Her breast breasted breastily" this isn't real but it very well could be

[alexrosas]

Both male and females have sexist takes in novels if you want good unbiased writing in a novel read Blood Meridian

[TeaCupToast]

I won’t say anything about female authors writing men to be 6’6, muscular and ripped, blue eyes and blonde hair, obsessed, trillionaires and fucking mafia bosses that just randomly kidnap a girl

[rachelwalmart]

"She was glimmering in the sun, her baked skin scrumptious in the light. Her cheekbones were flawless, her womb fertile. I waved hello. Her nipples waved back."

[error-try-again-later]

I'll never understand why authors can't just rub one out _before_ they start writing 💀

[edubflameface]

It's the same thing for female authors. Fifty shades, twighlight, even war cross.

[alyssum]

Female authors:

He was tall, handsome like adonis, and built like one. His last name was black, black like his soul. He was dangerous but soft at the same time. He was rich and a mafia boss, but also a vampire, werwolf hybrid at the same time – an alpha under the alphas. He was a jerk, but every female on earth wanted him, but no one was good enough for him until he met the female protagonist, which was average, not even pretty, but in some way the rich, alpha half god just immediately fell in love with her! Because she wasn't like the other girls! She was special!
So he did everything to make her his!! In an aggressive, sexy, alpha way. 😂😂😂😂

[luner_eclipse_studios]

"she was stick thin... Except her massive boobs that were 30 pounds each. She never wore makeup, because she was born with natural lash extensions, lipstick, eyeshadow and blush."

[the._.musical._.flute._]

Male writers be like:

She never wore makeup, but her eyelashes touched her eyebrows and her lips were red as a rose. Natural—not like other girls. Her cheeks were a perfect pinkish hue.

[ulbertdurchdienase]

Meanwhile, many female authors:

"He had every mental illness in the book, was troubled and violent.

But the female main character, who is TOTALLY not me and also literally perfect in every way, fixes him by showing him LOVE~... Like she never addresses his issues or resolves his possible trauma and/or helps him deal with his compulsions or mental breakdowns... They just DISAPPEAR~, whenever she is around.

Because therapy and medication is overrated for men.

But i'm also never writing about him actually getting better, that would be boring~."

[kennypowers]

Women write the same way lol. They exaggerate about men being tall, rich and mafia bosses 😂😂

[natecorsn]

“She rolled her eyes. Her breasts seemed to roll with them in unison.”

[Variadee_BOB]

“Woman weak..Man strong!!!” She whispered
WTF-

[skippy_the_funny_guy]

Her hair color tells me everything I need to know about her.

[orcusgrey]

"she was white, like the moon, no, whiter than the moon like really white, she's very submissive, and white."
-A reiteration of something I read written by a male author