12 Ways to Write Better Sentences for Creative Writers

12 Tips for Writing Better Sentences as a Creative Writer:

1. Avoid confusingly complex sentences
2. Set the Tone with word choices
3. Avoid passive voice
4. Remove Filtering
5. Set the pace with sentence length
6. Avoid body parts taking action
7. Reduce "was -ing" construction
8. Keep the wording natural
9. Cut unnecessary similes
10. Use vocabulary level strategically
11. Avoid starting actions
12. Cut out unnecessary words

[aderftard]

I'm an older man who grew up reading mostly 19th century authors. I've struggled to understand why my writing voice felt so unnatural and formal. Your tips opened my eyes. Thank you.

[jkuh]

"When in doubt, cut it out" is a motto that has saved me more times than I'd like to admit. If I re-read my work and feel that a sentence is too complex, I cut it out and rewrite it in a simpler way.

[Ibel.lagos.]

I don't understand almost anything you say but I try to watch your videos almost every day to learn English. I send you a virtual hug from Argentina ♥

[MSTKilla]

The filtering aspect is one I always struggle with and something I have to edit out later (when I remember to).

[windguardien]

In all my years writing and consuming writing content, never have I heard passive vs active voice explained so succinctly. Maybe I have, but it finally made sense where as every other explanation had failed.
"Is the subject performing the action?"
It's so good.

Thank you as always for your great work.

[nolancapps]

Love the tip about avoiding unnecessarily complex sentences. It's easy to write a bad sentence if you force that sentence to do too much

[Hermit_mouse]

If “disconsolate” is a ninth grade word I’m in big trouble.

[jacobkennedy]

Giving examples after every suggestion was the best choice you made in this video. It made a significant difference for me. I'm dyslexic and I'm trying to improve my writing ability as I tend to write on the messy side. This was excellent and thank you doesn't feel enough!

[Thesilverninja]

Guilty of all 12.

It took me over 10 years to break most of these habits, but old habits die hard.

What I've found useful is whenever I use a starting action, like in the example you shared: "Elizabeth started to laugh." I find a starting action helps when you want to have it interrupted by a character.

"Elizabeth started to laugh... until John gave her a death stare. Then it wasn't funny."

I also wholeheartedly agree on cutting unnecessary words. In one sentence it's not a big deal and is easily forgivable. In a 90, 000 page novel the work feels bloated for no reason. If a word is going to be included, it should be a detail with a specific purpose.

When I had to write a tribute to someone who had passed, I used a sentence: "And taught her daughter how to calculate sales prices at Dunham's."

I could have just said and "calculate sales prices." The sentence can survive on its own.

But I added Dunham's so the people local to the area might remember the time period when that store existed. I would have left Dunham's out if it had been a generic chain like Wal Mart. But because this particular Dunham's was a specific store during a specific time period, I added the detail for those who remembered the store.

Since I manage a website, I also found using a plugin called Yoast SEO helped improve my writing significantly because it has tools to identify passive voice and wordy sentences. It's mainly geared towards marketing articles and website traffic, but I find it's also useful for improving your own writing style when you force yourself to be more concise.

Great video, I also love the graphic and font selection. Very easy to read and extremely educational.

[xChikyx]

As a not native english speaker, -ing verbs vs the past conjugation of the same have total different meaning.
"She was walking" is she doing the action.
"She walked" is already finished.
Also, as someone with pretty high aphantasia, I think I experience the writing and reading completely different as someone that can visualize normally:
"Yes, " she said, walking. //
She walked. "Yes." //
"Yes." She walked. //
Each is 100% different to me.

[stet_]

Excellent rundown. Professional (nonfiction) editor myself and I'm still guilty of some of these.
A tip I've given some of the writers I work with (especially ESL): If you're worried a sentence is getting into run-on territory, read it out loud under your breath at a normal pace. If you find yourself wheezing by the end, split the sentence roughly where you started running out of breath. Punctuation is meant to replicate on paper the pauses we naturally take when speaking.

Also, could I possibly request a video about how to jot down the first page or two of a novel? Not just the opening plot beat, but literally the first few hundred words. Do you have any advice as to how to get past those first few paragraphs/how to make them count?

[maryhopper]

Passive voice can be really useful for creating tension, subtext or being efficient with words, particularly when it leaves out the person doing the action altogether. This can be because we don't know who did something: 'The jewels were stolen sometime before dawn.'

Or don't want to say (eg avoiding blame): 'Dad, your favourite mug got broken!'

Or we're building suspense: 'The door had been left ajar. Voices were hushed as she called out, "Hello?".

Or it's just not necessary to say who did it: 'The house was painted a flat, dismal grey that matched the rain-filled sky.'

It's a really powerful tool that we often don't notice we're using, so not always bad or a 'no'. 🙂

[EllenBrock]

Hi guys! I forgot to wait for the HD to finish processing before I published the video, so if it looks blurry to you, just wait about a half hour before watching.

Also, typo at 16:48. It should be "set" not "sat." Sorry! I checked my cards a dozen times, but I always manage to miss something. Dang long covid brain fog!

Thanks for watching and for your support!

[Katranga]

i've been removing filter words for a years now and it's SUCH an incredible way to strengthen the connection to the character's POV. another tip would be removing "filler" type words like just, really, very, kind of, etc. or whatever kind of common word you use a lot that could be removed for the same meaning, or replaced with a more specific word. i never considered how vocab choice could change the reading speed, that's very cool! also i found your example sentence "he ran across the yard like a soccer player running for the ball" very funny for some reason. thanks for another great video!

[juliegolick]

Why have I never heard of Hemmingway Editor before?! This is gold! Thanks for the recommendation, and for all your tips! They're things that I (generally) knew already, but sometimes forget in the heat of writing. Definitely a great guide for what should be on a sentence-level "cheat sheet" for an editing pass.

[unicornthemfatale]

I truly appreciate how clear your examples are. A lot of writing advice doesn't come with clear examples or information on how to improve specifically, but your advice is fantastic!

[TheldBat]

I follow most of these tips already, but I've never considered my use of -ing words. A glance at the first few pages of my latest story, made me realize I can do better. Thank you, Ellen! A great video with excellent examples as always.

[ulla]

I also feel (hehehe), that in case of filtering, removing the "unnecessary" ones can help adding weight to the places where you do want to use "felt", "saw" or "realized" etc because the feeling or realizing was the relevant part. If every other sentence is dotted with the filtering words, then there is no difference.

[johnathanrhoades]

Passive voice has been a struggle for years. A whole editing pass is needed to get that out of my writing…🙃
You can also hit “smelled” and “tasted” with other verbs. “The stench of aged garbage assaulted Jim as he rounded the alley corner” or “the luxurious sweetness of the berry juice coated Joira’s mouth. It lingered. A moment later, but a moment too late, Joira noticed the background bitterness of the arsenic.”

[Kohi_of_Greed]

This is, without a doubt, the best writing tips video I've seen so far. I've seen dozens, perhaps hundreds at this point. And yet, this has proposed a set of simple, common, and fatal issues and mistakes, then presented a coherent explanation and provided fluid examples. Thank you very much!