3 things to know when healing anxiety

This vlog digs into a question that we get from just about all the students who are participating in my online healing programs. It revolves around what to do when we feel more sensations in our body that are intense. Put simply, what do we do when we start to feel more ‘anxiety’.

If you are brand new here, please don’t flee from this vlog l if you are saying to yourself, “What the heck ...more anxiety and intense sensation?”

I know, I know. This is not exactly what you had in mind to potentially be setting yourself up for MORE feelings of anxiety and panic, but that is why you are here and why the education, from the outset, is critical for successful healing at the nervous system level.

In this vlog, I answer a question from one of my students that I believe is mandatory viewing for anyone considering embarking on this nervous system healing journey.

To give you a little reminder of why things might feel a bit more intense before they level out...it is because when we’ve held all of our biological fears inside of us: those fight and flight responses (along with the intense internal experiences that come with them!) all those charges are waiting to come out and be experienced.

When we start to put in the request to our nervous system - and all the biological tissues and organ systems that it connects to - that we’re ready to do the deep digging, so to speak, and heal, they WILL bubble up to the surface. This means that the nice cozy (yet chronic illness producing) functional freeze that we’ve maybe been living with for decades or more is starting to let go of its grip (that has been keeping us “safe”).

So when my students tell me they are starting to feel more ‘anxiety’, I do a little happy dance inside because it means that freeze is lifting, the old charges are emerging, and they are shifting towards more regulation.

NOW, it is essential that we don’t flood ourselves back into more shutdown or more chaos with these newer sensations and intensities 24/7. This is why it is super, duper, uber important to go slow with this work, focus on building capacity in the system, and also see it as a long term lifestyle change, similar to how you would with eating and exercise.

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Resources I mention during this video:

► Healing Trauma 3-Part Video Training HT

► Why taking a deep breath can be counterproductive

► The ACE Study Resources

► The unknown causes of anxiety (things your doctor may never ask you)

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Thank you for being here!

1. Leave a comment and let me know how this video impacted you. Feel free to leave a question (my team answers them each week!)

3. Follow me on social here:

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Please know that…

The statements on this YouTube channel or in videos are simply opinion. Content presented or posted on this channel is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment or a professional therapeutic relationship. Content presented or posted is intended to provide general health information for educational purposes only and you should contact the appropriate healthcare professional before relying on any such information.

[ice.immortal]

Thank you for this video. I’m finally staring to understand what is happening to my body. After a years living in survival mode I changed my life and created safe environment for myself, also I decided to work on my emotions, traumas and programming. This is when my body started to give me the most excruciating and agonising anxiety attacks to the point where I was fainting due to the lack of oxygen as my chest and stomach was so frozen that I couldn’t breath. Often I would wake up in that state, full of pain, anxiety and fear. I wasn’t thinking anxious thoughts, my life was safe and better than ever before but my body was tantruming to the point where I started to think suicidal thoughts as the physical and emotional pain was just too much. It felt like continuous death experience on every level of my being. Now I understand that I’m realising all the survival stress and because I understand what it is, I can practice no resistance. Before I would hate my body for doing this to me and myself for my lack of ability to fix it. I’ve tried so many different healing modalities and supplements. Nothing ever worked. Now me and my body are learning how to feel, that is safe to feel. One day we will be friends 😊♥️

[tinyelephant]

Can Irene do a video on how to make yourself do anything? I spend my life as a couch potato, spaced out, frozen, dissociated. I can only force myself to do something under threat of danger/chaos/catastrophe just like in childhood. I have no goals, interests or life. Just work and spaced out on the tv and computer at home.

[haydenwilsonx]

Anxiety is a perception that in the future you will experience more pain than pleasure. To remove, we have to go to the original source event and change the meaning we denote to it. We must find the hidden blessings and synchronous opposites in the moments of perceived trauma. Doing this is HARD work. But 100% worth it. And it CAN be neutralised within a specific time frame (aka 1-2 HOUR(S)). Just my opinion...hope that helps anyone reading this.

[janislevyify]

Perfect timing! 😀 Pulled this up after seeing your current post. Thank you! 😀❤

Was in survival stress throughout childhood and during many times in my adulthood. Also traumatic experiences. Some years ago, was laid off along with many other people in the company.. Before fhis I had no trouble finding work and performing well at my jobs. This time, I did get some contract work but couldn't keep the jobs because my work performance wasn't up to par. Unemployment ran out and lost my home and my car. And credit. Fortunately, I was eligible for early retirement Social Security. But too late and not enough to avoid losses.

It wasn't all bad. Very grateful for the many friends who helped me during that time! ❤ Some I had never met (friends on Facebook). At least I had money for food, internet, cellphone, taking public transportation, storage. And I only spent 3 days at a homeless shelter. Survival stress, but not a bad experience. Actually made some friends while there. 😊

All that is background is related to what's going on with me right now.

Because I've been depending on inheritance to supplement Social Security for the last 6 years, it's going to run out eventually. So I thought about getting a remote part-time job. Saw a post on Facebook and went through hiring process. Turned out to be a scam.

OK. My attitude was "Next". So I updated my LinkedIn profile, updated resume and started looking. Was going to renew connections and add some new ones, but something happened. I lost my steam. And my confidence. As in "Can I do the job? Will I be fast enough, accurate enough?"

Feeling very tired. And contracted. Capacity for dealing with stress has strunk. Digestive system affected. Been going on for the last several days. Functional freeze.

Today, I realized why. Besides having to be a perfectionist while revising resume several times, working for a corporation and doing accounting work no longer resonates with me. Driven from wanting additional income, but not from the heart. Didn't occur to me while I was doing prep work for job search. Felt a sense of accomplishment. But then I felt very tired the next day and the next, etc.

AND another reason is past survival stress and traumatic experience being laid off and what happened afterwards. Childhood experiences also a factor. See this now because of this video.

Yesterday, got into a verbal shuffle with a house mate. Because tired, anxious, low capacity. And he's triggered very easily. Wrong word and the drama begins. That's kind of stressful on it's own. I'm usually careful about what I say. But wasn't as careful this time. And know he's toxic at times, but can't change the situation yet.

He did apologize a little while afterwards. But it made me aware that I'm not in a good state mentally and emotionally right now. That even though I don't "feel" anxious, as in panic attacks, I am anxious and need to do more work on resiliency, building more capacity. The beach balls are overflowing.

I apologize for taking your time with this very long and detailed comment! You give so much! And I am so grateful for you!

THANK YOU for this very timely teaching!

And this is such a long comment. But "Damn the Torpedos!" Posting.

[heylonnie]

Thank you, it's a good reminder to take stock and see how much capacity I've grown in doing this healing work (with IFS therapy and paying attention to my nervous system). The anxiety gremlins still bubble up but there IS awareness now, and capacity and I'm able to deal with them, without freaking out. What is so helpful with your teaching style, Irene, is that you give me names for the sensations I feel and for what is happening in my system from a Somatic stance. You're putting great work into the world, thank you.

[ginap]

This is so helpful to me. I have had digestive issues (nausea, vomiting, diarrhea) that increased in severity for 5 years and resulted in me retiring 2 years early. Midway through this timeframe, I think I experienced a breakdown following a very sudden ‘existential’ situation related to my childhood traumatic events that triggered a huge physiological response in me. My symptoms worsened in that, following the event, I could not eat or drink anything without vomiting for a week. I have had good trauma therapy before this, including EMDR and exercises from Jon Cabot-Zinn’s ‘Full Catastrophe Living.’ However, I feel that my past trauma still caught up to me physically. I’m really working hard on healing, and these videos really help me, but if I can convey any advice myself, I would say that healing does NOT occur in a linear manner-same for forgiveness. Sometimes I feel more healing and forgiveness towards my toxic parents, but other times, I feel such rage it scares me. Things just feel closer to the surface and more accessible, even if I don’t want access to the memories.

[amandabennett]

I 100% resonate with the pool/beach ball analogy. In fact I keep reminding myself that I have too many balls in the air and that I MUST set them down because after years of doing that - I’m maxed out. I’ve hit my capacity. I’m experiencing chronic fatigue as well as physical pain/soreness. In times of high stress I will literally (for “no reason”) freeze up and just start tearing / crying - like at the grocery store - even church!
I’m comfortable identifying and feeling the feelings… I just need to learn where to go from here. Today is day 1.5 of watching your videos… I’m on the right track it seems. Thank you.

[sumayyacoovadia]

I'm so glad that I found this video. I've been working through the 21 day tune up and I've never felt such intense anxiety come up. It's 3 weeks now and my system still feels the intensity of anxiety. However I feel better knowing that I'm healing. Thank you Irene.

[carinascherer]

wow, i'm amazed how lately the right things come to me at the exact right time. that's what i'm experiencing right now, more intense panic where there was numbness before. i kind of already knew that this is probably a good sign, but it's soo good to have it confirmed from s.o. else :) YES to alignment and healing and thank you for posting this video!!

[annyspb]

Abso bloomin' lutely brilliant - thank you so much for these videos! I'm watching them and watching them and gradually Getting It. It's so brilliant that we have the internet now and can find out what's cooking in these therapy practices.

[ericarceneaux]

This was incredibly insightful and enlightening! Thank you!!!

[siiiriously]

your videos are so so so soooo helpful in my healing process. thank you! it´s just so sad to me, and fills me with rage against this system, that none of my former therapist had ANY idea about trauma, about neuroscientific approaches and so on...
random sidenote: the "ACE influence pyramid" made me laugh out loud... the straight arrow between conception and death cracked me up! :´D

[luisrobertomartinezacevedo]

I was in sessions with an excellent trauma therapist last year, much of this process happened practically naturally thanks to her guidance. I had covid at the beginning of this year, which resulted in a loss with my breathing capacity and my ability to connect with my body, understanding the theory gives me the confidence to go back and make contact with my body. Thanks a lot! Excellent content!!!

[Kuruflower]

What if you are already overwhelmed? Like shaking, heart hurts, tightness in chest, Dissociating due to years of flashbacks and trauma? Not having regulated throughout. Physically ok so far. (edited to add) I found out I need safety, I am safe and practicing recognizing what that means.

[orchidsrising]

Who would click not like on her video? Hehe 🌸 She is awesome!!

[baldvin]

Well so much for all the "just breathe " messaging hahahah. this all lines up perfectly with my lived experience so its is so nice to have someone put it into proper context. Thank you.

[andram]

I'm so glad I'm listening to you as I was looking for another word for anxiety so now I'm gona call it stored survival stress too.❤

[malamadrone]

Wow I feel like this video speaks directly to the anxiety that I'm feeling rise up. After so many years of work and exploration and love and tenderness with myself, I was off balance about the anxiety rising up today. But this video is giving me such a beautiful reframing -- it feels deeply part of the healing. THANK YOU.

[sonjaraela]

Your knowledge and clarity of explanations, are laced with wisdom. All your videos have been very helpful in coming to more understanding of the brain, the nervous system, past traumas and their arising once serious dedication is given to healing. Thank you particularly for the letter from Andy regarding inability to sleep, which is my current experience. Committing more to somatic practices and consequently experiencing first more discomfort and now slowly coming to inner peace and healing. Thank you for your work.

[dialman]

Wow the work you are doing is so important! Thanks