You're NOT the main character.

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What I use for my daily journaling:

Books that shaped me:



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[suzannemayo]

We need to maintain a balance between self care and consideration for others.

[wickkdd]

i don't call the cancelling plans at the last minute self love, i just call it anxiety 😅

[bananoatmeal]

Self-obsession is a survival instinct in this age of loneliness and isolation.
when we feel connected with others, our mind faces outward; we are not self-conscious and truly free.
when we feel isolated, we look inward. We become overprotective of ourselves. We obsess over ourselves and our status because we don't feel protected by others.

[minoucha]

I totally get the point. HOWEVER, our modern age biggest disease is thinking that we HAVE to be available to EVERYONE for the sole purpose of having our phone on us 24/7.

If not urgent, i will only respond to that text when my list of priorities is checked and when i have the mental space to carry some meaningless conversations or answer memes.

[deezed]

I totally agree! We need to have boundaries from others to practice self-love, but our self-love also needs to be practiced within boundaries lol

[Mar-ME-sh]

You are the voice of wisdom in a world that has gained so much yet lost many core human values & etiquette. You are a class act 🌸🦋

[elhorrendo]

I know where you're coming from, Lana. There's a culture and a generation of narcissists.
Like another person commented, I experience (clinically diagnosed) anxiety. I often have social anxiety, where i start feeling both trapped and suffocated and completely alone in large groups of people. It has lead to panic attacks in the past. I also have every intention of going to a thing or meeting a friend and on the day, I feel like I won't be good company because of how I am feeling. However it depends on who it is and the scenario. Often times, I just have show up. But not always. Occasionally I just can not do it. Self love from my perspective is honouring myself and my principle and being kind to myself. I treat my loved ones better than myself sometimes. "Self love is the understanding that one deserves to be treated with care and dignity and honour. I'm not narcissists. As a teen I hated myself. And growing into my early 20's I realised how unhealthy and inaccurate it was. And the more I as are and trained at the gym and meditated and trained in martial arts, the greater the feeling of self worth was. And it took some getting used to, having women almost literally throwing themselves at me wherever I went. And I realised I must be handsome and suddenly realised my training had paid off with women staring at my biceps all the time. But I was still the same numble and loving and decent person I always was. And that combined with confidence and the rest was attractive. Like I said, I wasn't accustomed to that kind of attention. But I stayed who actually was before my teens when things happened that had me directing my pain and confusion inwards.
No more. I am confident and know who I am. I know what is the most healthy for me. And practicing those things consistently is self love. People mistake humility with lack of confidence. I have a healthy balance. And no one makes me doubt the goodness and love I have in my heart. And some have tried. That was their insecurity, not mine. I'm never thrown off balance by people projecting their insecurities onto me.
What other people think of me is none of my business.

[BankruptMonkey]

I cancel things day of sometimes because I'm chronically ill and sometimes I get a random flare up and can't physically move, but everyone assumes I'm just doing this jerk selfish "self love" thing so I lose friends

[rosyperez-reje]

Toxic relation and friends with benefits do that, unrespectful, immadure, no interest at all only benefits, playful, unpuntual, superficial interaction and less effort. If someone accepts little, then this person will receive. Boundaries and walk away is the advice and the player will respect you or walk away to bother another silly person. Normal relationships don't do that. Good advices lady, keep going.

[meowiemeowmeow]

Be considerate with others. If you felt like you are not really into that plan just tell that to another person. Don't cancel a plan the last minute if its not emergency.

[yKjCi]

That’s true- but people feel entitled to each others time and if I didn’t take time to respond I’d literally be on my phone all day unable to relax. I won’t do that- I don’t need to jump because someone wants me to. Not a main character issue, it’s a keeping my sanity and enjoying the moment issue.

[Blondiee]

Most main characters are consistent and reliable. That's WHY they're main characters. Anyone who is flaky inconsistent is an extra. That's how I see it.

[Ragdollcatlover]

As an autistic, anxious person, I agree with you. I get anxious about meetings but generally people are becoming incredibly self centred and uncaring.

[Lyla-kgxt]

That’s why I hate the “Haha I’m always late” people bc I always make sure I’m on time for everything especially if someone else is counting on me. I don’t understand how flippant people are.

[HawraaHasan-ffgq]

A guy i liked once did this so many times and it helped me hate him and get over him, it’s never cool or attractive to be like this .
I just hate how being nice and respectful is now considered weakness or desperate !!

[euejdjrhfjejwjnjdued]

We are perceiving the main character energy with a wrong lense. The main character energy is suppose to respect, and assert what they want in a postive way. Its also to encourage not discourage. The main character energy should elevate the aura not depresss it. It's different. It doesnt mean cancelling plans the last minute. Its how u do it. Ofcourse you sometimes dont feel like it and youre allowed to backoff. However u can always be polite and enocuraging instwad of playing the victim about it.

[Razcfr]

I can imagine this short clip is taken out of context, but we are the main characters of our lives. First of all you have a duty to yourself to do whatever you need, you live with yourself before anybody else. Only afterwards comes duth to other people, you can't have a duty to others and help others if you don't help yourself first. Responding in 5 days to messages is included in this, while not ideal, your personal health comes first snd sometimes you need to prioritise your duty to yourself. Friends who love you will understand when you explain, other people don't matter.

Again, context is important but I've seen to many people exhausted by duty to others when they should have looked after themselves first and for what? Most of the times you don't even get the same level of response from most people so be selective.

[catrocastre]

I'm glad to say that I have ditched the diva era and aspiration to be so, it was necessary at that point. But now, a lot of people are becoming aware of the word SONDER, and the TV series Pysch, which values laughs, and friendship.

[NoName-iqdl]

I've been saying this. People are becoming more and more selfish by the day

[alancook]

You're right. And it's because we are becoming increasingly SELFISH