Emi Mahmoud - How to Translate a Joke

Emi Mahmoud, performing at Camp Bar in Saint Paul, MN.

About Button:

Button Poetry is committed to developing a coherent and effective system of production, distribution, promotion and fundraising for spoken word and performance poetry.

We seek to showcase the power and diversity of voices in our community. By encouraging and broadcasting the best and brightest performance poets of today, we hope to broaden poetry's audience, to expand its reach and develop a greater level of cultural appreciation for the art form.

[jeniferjoseph]

I love how she reuses the words of the joke, but now in a different, more horrifying context. The contrast gives me chills.

[kaylaslack]

"There's 4 women in the joke. None of them speak." My jaw just hit the floor.

[MarshaBaldwin]

The double entendres, the metaphors, the shifts, the fact that she literally translates the joke into English then translates the meaning and tone of it! This poem is a literary masterpiece. IM SHOOK!

[andiehuman]

you when she said "we call women cows in every language" I actually got goosebumps. The ending hurt so much too

[f.a.k]

That last line about her brother gave me the chills

[SPcamert]

They say that the best way to kill a joke is to explain why it's funny. So can we just take every slight, every snicker, every racist or sexist or ageist or any other -ist joke, and explain them away in such a beautiful way as she did. Can we do that?

[PenCliqueMedia]

"Or they settle... down..." lowkey the hardest line in the poem

[ThaBlkRainbow]

''We call women cows in all languages'' Geez! I was taken aback by that.

''We are more willing to say offensive than dangerous''

[taylorwininger-sieve]

The cow speaks while the Rose is stripped of her thorns. While the others are now dead decorations. I was completely taken aback.

[kimmikoakakarolin]

I've done my best to transcribe the entire poem because even after having watched it a dozen times I still find myself chilled to the core both by the way it was written and the meaning behind it.

How to translate a joke:
A man walks into the market; looking for a date.
He asks the village playboy for help.
The village playboy says,
“Watch and learn.”

He walks up to a woman selling honey and says,
“Do you have any honey, Honey?”
She swoons.
Gives him honey and a kiss.

He walks up to a woman selling flowers and says,
“Do you have any flowers, you Rose?”
She melts.
Gives him flowers and a kiss.

He walks to a third woman,
“Do you have any sugar, Sugar?”
She practically dies.
Gives him sugar and kisses him twice.

The playboy comes back.
“Your turn, Stud.”

The man apprehensively walks up to a woman selling dairy and says,
“Got any milk, Cow?”

Realise that humour transcends all boundaries,
That laughter is a language that know no borders,
That this joke I learned in Arabic makes perfect sense in English,
And French,
And in any other language.
Realise that we call women cows in every language.

Realise that humour leaves little room for questions
And even less room for victims
And even less room for apologies.

Realise that in one version of this joke the man is looking to pick up girls,
In another he’s looking for a wife,
In a third he is looking for an answer.

And maybe the cow slaps him,
Or the cow ask him to leave and he tries again,
Or she walks faster, clutches her purse,
Or maybe she threatens him and is jailed for treason,
Or maybe the cow sues him and the case is dismissed,
Or they settle down.

We are willing to say offensive more than we say dangerous;
As if harm isn’t transitive,
As if it isn’t something you do to another person.

We like to pretend that I am not as uncomfortable alone on the streets of New York as I am on the streets of Nepal,
That a stroll in Philly, Indiana, Minnesota doesn’t bring as many stares as in India, Sudan or Egypt.

That violence is a third world problem,
That it isn’t here,  
Hiding in a conversation,
Or a bouquet,  
Or a market
That not being alone makes a difference.

If they don’t get the joke;
Say it again,
Smile more this time,
Repeat the punch-line,
Pause for dramatic effect,
Use jazz-hands if you have to.
Laugh.

In another version the man walks into the market looking for a date and leaves with an unwilling woman.
A bounty that in my language I am a sweet,
And if not that; a decoration,
A flower,
A gift.

He walks up to the girl selling honey.
She gives him her eyes,
Her arms,
Her silence.

He walks up to the girl selling sugar.
She practically dies.

He walks up to the girl selling flowers,
Calls her a rose,  
Strips all of her thorns,
Sticks her in a bouquet.

She fights,
He breaks her,  
Calls her a dead thing,  
She melts,
Is trampled in the market.

There are four women in the joke,
None of them speak.

Realise that humour transcends all realities,
That laughter is a language that knows no borders,
That this joke that I heard in Arabic hurts just as much in English,
And in French and in any other dialect.

And in the last version,
In the last version the man is foaming at the mouth with another girl’s jugular around his teeth,
His Adam’s apple making excuses for him from all the way over there,
And the market is cheering,
And the girl’s hair is a bracelet around his neck,
And the market is still cheering,
Or the audience,  
Or the schoolyard,
Or the other men,
And he asks her name and she says,
“You left a box of your things in my stomach, are you still trying to find yourself on another girl’s neck?”

Last week: my seven year old brother said that I am the reason he wakes up every morning.
I gave him a hug,
He whispered to my mother,
“Works every time.”
I saw the fear in her eyes.
We laughed.

[summydots]

Humour leaves less room for questions. And even less room for victims. And even less room for apologies.

[MusicCharms]

"You left a box of your things in my stomach. Are you still trying to find yourself on another girl's neck."

I think this is the best line I have ever heard.

[amalkhateeb]

Again, she stuns me. the use of the words in the joke in a darker context and how the poem is so simple to understand and apply to real life but isn't too twisted or complicated that the point doesn't come across. We, in western countries like America or Canada or Britain like to pretend like we don't have the same issues here as we do in third world countries but like Emi said, the same joke hurts just as much in France as it does in Sudan

[weareallfritz]

You know I show things like this to my mom and she asks why I like to listen to people yelling at me. The reason is because they have something beautiful to say. It's because they thought out this thing and worked on it and made it perfect that they get their point across just right. This is beautiful and it makes you think. The yelling adds emotion and that emotion is beautiful.

[HermysBazaar]

Oh my God this is officially one of my favorites! I'm in love.

[carltonbanks]

The thing is I NEVER CRY, like it's been YEARS. And here I am, it's 1 AM, I feel like I've been punched in the stomach and like my heart burst out of my chest and got pierced. I listened to every word, at the end I was sad it ended, happy it was beautiful, afraid because it was so true... I usually say "I hanged on every word" to compliment good essays/poems/speeches, I didn't realize that it wasn't true until now, I thought I really listened but I didn't, it takes so much talent to make someone *really* listen.

[xghostfynch]

Incredible! The set up as a joke first was a fresh introduction to a poem, but it only got better from there! Genuinely in love with the words and the performance. <3

[moche]

BOOM. So so powerful. This is one of the best poems Button has ever posted.

[Kittyraptor]

Emi balances raw emotion with humour and poetic rhythm so well - the message carries so effortlessly. I loved this.

[aliddekibryan]

wow....that ending is exquisite. almost made me cry actually