The U-curve of happiness: Why old age is a time of psychological bliss | Ashton Applewhite

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The U-curve of happiness: Why old age is a time of psychological bliss
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The U-curve of happiness shows that we humans are most content at the beginnings and ends of our lives.

The famous midlife crisis is the trough of our happiness because it's a time when we have responsibility for people older and younger than us, and we grow aware that we may not fulfill the dreams of our youth.

Children and people in their 80s are uniquely able to live in the moment and be happy because they live at a neurological and psychological sweet spot, respectively.
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ASHTON APPLEWHITE:

Ashton Applewhite is a Brooklyn-based activist and writer. Her latest book, This Chair Rocks: A Manifesto Against Ageism, debunks many myths about late life.
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TRANSCRIPT:

ASHTON APPLEWHITE: There are lots of legitimate reasons to worry about getting older, like getting sick and running out of money, ending up alone. Those fears are legitimate and real. But the thing is, we need to think about how the culture in which we age shapes those experiences. I'm not a Pollyanna about aging. I'm sort of in the 'both sides of the story' business. We hear only the downside. And we hear very little about all the positive aspects of aging, which are that we grow more confident, we grow happier.

When I started thinking about all this, my view of old age was unrelievedly grim. And one of the things I stumbled upon really early was the U-curve of happiness. And when I first encountered it, seriously I thought they must have cornered two 80 year olds, and given them a cookie, and said 'How are you doing?' The U-curve shows that people are happiest at the beginnings and the ends of our lives, that midlife, the famous midlife crisis, is indeed the trough of our satisfaction. And this is true for a couple of reasons. Midlife is the time of life when typically we have maximum family responsibilities. We're supposed to be crushing it in our careers. We may have responsibility for people both older and younger than us. And it's also the time of life where we realize, gee, I may not become a ballerina, I may not hike Mt. Everest. And those are sobering reflections, that maybe now, you're at a turning point, and there's more road behind you than ahead.

But something happens as we get older, especially up into our 80s. And it is the exact opposite of an ageist thought that I started out with. I thought, well, obviously, everything about getting older is going to suck. And one of the things that clearly sucks about it is the proximity to death. I envisioned, I literally envisioned the shadow of the grim reaper stretching over this sad iron bedstead. The awareness that time is short does not fill people with dread. It doesn't work that way neurologically. That was another assumption of mine. The knowledge that time is short helps people live in the moment, because they are more conscious about what they want to do with their time and who they want to spend it with. Kids live in the moment because they aren't neurologically equipped to do anything else. And olders do it because precisely they are aware that time is short and they want to make the most of the remaining time. It's why the older people are, the less they worry about dying. They don't want to die. And they especially don't want to die in pain. But they don't worry about it. And they think younger people worry too much about both the dying and the getting there.
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I always liked the saying, "Youth is wasted on the young.".

MusicByJC
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I'm old and I'm at peace. Best time of my life. My favorite thing is to take my grand kids out to do all kinds of different things. Seeing them having fun is the best feeling in the world. They are the light of my life! When we're young, we tend to think about ourselves way too much. But most of us learn that it's much more rewarding to think about others. Not afraid of dying, either. In fact, it sounds like quite an adventure! Like a magnificent trip to the stars, as Van Gogh said!

sngscratcher
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*At old age, you release all tension about how you are perceived (fame, status, money, looks), because you know that nothing worldly will save you from the same outcome that people eventually experience at the end of their lives. You become more in touch with your true inner self and want to really feel the joy of life, before leaving this existence.*

ossen
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We live in a youth-obsessed culture but there is so much beauty and wisdom in older age.

AuthenticSelfGrowth
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I am the happiest I have ever been in my life. I free to do what I want. The stress of working is gone. My goals are stay healthy & have maximum amount of fun. Thanks

happytx
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As a Senior, I have found that I take more pleasure in the little things, the simple things, like drinking coffee while watching the birds through my kitchen window. There was a time in my youth when I wanted adventure, noise, excitement, and intense pleasure. Now I'm content with a comfortable chair and a book.

davidholman
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I worry more about getting dead and not so much about being dead.

I agree, we need to live in the moment. Be happy and honest.

PigRipperLAW
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I was going to share my thoughts on ageing, but I’ve forgotten them.

josephasghar
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This is really such a good share! I used to wonder as a kid why old people weren’t acting like they were petrified of dying! 😄

PHDinMeTV
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Old folks homes are gonna be lit when I get older

Meme
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it's easy to say "don't worry about aging and dying". But I think it's smart to prepare for that, taking care of your health, taking matters in your own hands without relying too much on chance and doctors. That's what I do at least, I try to set good health habits so I'll live a long and happy life !

Studious_Studios
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Life is difficult no matter what age you are.
Do your best to stay healthy. Stick with the basic needs of life, for, clothing, shelter and basic transportation all the rest is not necessary. Stay out of debt and save money to buy yourself a small home or a tiny house then save for your retirement.I just retired last year at age 57. I spend at least an hour day walking around in the forest and along streams enjoying every moment of it. Every day you live and every breath you take is a gift from God. Do not fear getting older, do it with Grace and dignity!
Take the time to watch the 25 minute YouTube video, . 40 years a nomad.

SteveV
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Your body falls apart, your body recovers slower, your not as athletic as when you were younger, your memory we're the positive the things you said we're benifits any young person could keep in mind when he or she is young and have the same benifits.

frankiecal
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Is it weird that I am experiencing this and am only 24?

victorrono
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It’s simple; you just don’t give AF anymore and it’s liberating!

msmoniz
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It's not the approaching of the grim reaper that gets to me but the realization that virtually everything I have been taught and told in education and in the media is total BS and propaganda. I am more motivated by sheer anger and righteous indignation in my attempts to shake of the shallow delusional lifestyle we are fed. Empathy I have always had for others, but the psychopaths who run this show need to be dealt with, when that's done maybe 'happy' can follow.

blackthai
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Great subject! I made a video about this a couple months ago, I found it very interesting as a subject.
As a 43 year old male with many issues to work through, as we all do, I have had some low points. But looking forward, I hope my age works WITH me as I get older, and I expect to be a happy content old man. :) I can try

carpo
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Is it happiness or just not giving a crap? I think it may be the latter. I'll let you know in a few years.

MarkGast
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This speaker 🔊 is gorgeous. She exudes positive ✨️ energy. Fantastic!!

johnnyboyvan
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0:57 Well, when I think of the old people in my family, the majority of them are unhappy or even

TOFKAS