Strangest Things You Saw As A Delivery Boy (r/AskReddit)

Fresh AskReddit Stories: Delivery boys of reddit, what is the weirdest delivery you ever did? --- LIKE AND I WILL UPLOAD MORE REDDIT STORIES!

#weirdest #delivery #ever

Music: Kevin MacLeod

[TheLegacyofKingXeno]

Look, 40 yo guy with giant dog, suit of armor, and creepy Halloween music is not necessarily "goals, " but it's also not NOT goals when I'm 40...

[hankroberts]

The fact that most of these have positive endings may have restored half a shred of my faith in humanity.

[gurkensalat]

'one dollar and fifty cents to two million house'

Well, I don't want to brag, but my house is also between those digits.

[jyadel]

I delivered Chinese food in college. Strangest thing? Delivered to a house near the campus on a Friday night, so I figured it was for some sort of party. Three bags of food, just over $80 worth. I get to the house, all the lights are off and there's some dim light coming from inside. No doorbell, knock on the door. I hear NOTHING, followed by the door opening. Whoever opened the door was already standing their waiting because they never came out from behind the door when they opened it. I look in, and the living room is completely empty except for like four dozen lit candles and six girls in tankinis sitting in a circle with cardboard tiki masks on. All the girls are facing me while sitting in this circle. total comes out to (whatever it was)". The six girls raise their arms and point together to a table next to the door. There's a $100 bill on it. "You guys need change?" They all shake their head in unison. I put the food on the table, grab the money, wish them a good night, and leave. Best part: two months later I'm playing DD for my sisters. I get a text to pick them up from the same address, but I don't remember it until I get there. Place is packed, party in full swing. I go into the house to find them. As I'm looking around I see this group of girls looking at me like I'm some sort of serial killer. I smile and raise my arm to point at them. Two of them start laughing while the others run off. Talking to them I learned that it was a prank they pull on delivery drivers and the other girls ran off embarrassed because I was the first it didn't work on. I know this is a long story but hey, it beats the times I got mugged for some crab rangoon.

[chriro]

Special requests : Send your cutest delivery boy

Me, who was told by his grandma that he is a handsome young man :

I got this

[ShadowHunter]

To be honest, two slices of pizza and sharing a meal with fine amish folk is more valuable to me than a 20 dollar tip.

[mfree]

11:46 The only thing that would make this make sense, is they had a bet going... called the chinese place and the pizza place at the same time and whoever got their food first won.

[Liam]

I delivered Pizzas as a first job for Dominos.

The weirdest by far was delivering to a pleasant neighborhood, with a pleasant house. The guy answers the door as a normal person. We make the smalltalk about the order, the price, etc. Out of the corner of my eye I see movement down the hall and in a bedroom. A lady is just being plowed by her dog.

I took my 5 dollar tip, pretended not to have seen anything, got into my SUV, looked out the windshield, and while laughing yelled "WHAT THE FUUUUCK"

Alternately there was this lady, around 40. I delivered to her often and knew she was fairly ditzy and one of those "Wine moms" who got shitfaced off a bottle of cheap Okanagan wine. She begins to flirt with me and such, I just smile and make smalltalk hoping to god her card gets accepted so I can leave. She slips a 20 in my pocket while flirting. Now me, a 130 pound soaking wet twink of a boy, is like "oh my god this is how it feels to feel like a piece of meat". Well it got worse. In her drunken state she coos out "You look like my son~". The machine beeped. I asked her if she wanted her receipt. And I drove back to the store, my face that of sheer panic.

[FissionCube]

ok the girl who bought pizza to call out her cheating gf is on another level, id never come up with that and its such a power move

[icetheking]

2:50 the house was anywhere from 1 dollar and 50 cents to 2 million. I'm really bad at judging home value

[greyvirus]

I delivered a 2 packs of chicken wings to a guy in a motel 25 meters away (I walked there it was next to the pizza shop) and got a $50 tip. That guy was a legend among our pizza shop crew. He always tipped like so and he didn't even have his own place to live.

[pokefan]

2:57 "one dollar and fifty cent to two million house"

yea, that's read
EDIT: SARCASM INTENDED. DUH.

[crazy]

Worked for Papa Johns for two years and lemme tell you, what a ride.
There were two crazy stories that I'll always remember.
The first one was a visit to a rich guy's house. The way it was isolated, you'd never tell it was there. Deep in the woods, but a massive place with at least 12 rooms, a living room that had an embroidered ceiling with a chandelier made of these massive, interwoven deer horns-- the guy just went all-out. Figured I liked him on the spot-- that is, until he didn't even tip.
The second was a small house in a relatively safe area. Countryside home with neighbors but there were no real threats in the area. I knock on the door-- typical country family environment, and the moment the door opens, I see a few things.
The first thing I saw was the man. I'm 6'9, he's 6'5. He has worn-out teeth, a look of deep concern, and looks like he's about to "retreat" for some reason.
The second thing I saw was the gun on the table. A sawed-off double-barrel shotgun with three rounds sitting next to it. I felt uneasy, but I'm used to working with firearms, and just felt like things weren't going to end badly for me. Gut feeling, I guess?
Third was the possible wife, who darted for the gun and moved it out of view.
There was a kid, probably six years old, sucking his thumb in the corner.
Guy just pays me and I leave.

[WolfyFancyLads]

"A big stream of pee starts to fall out his robe. He doesn't seem to notice, or doesn't care. He just keeps making small talk as it's happening."

This.... This was a Little Britain sketch!!

[KBTLR]

the one kid said the amish family didn't tip, but, i mean- he got 2 slices of pizza.. that's a tip.

[DareToBeDeviant]

Order pizza (or anything) and _then_ check how much money you have? Takes a special kind of stupid. I usually see that kind of thing in fiction.

[hawyee]

i'm the only female driver & the youngest in my store, so my managers usually ask me if i want my male coworkers to deliver to "sketchy" places (dirt roads, no streetlights, you know the deal) after dark for me. one time my manager told a dude i don't like to take one of my deliveries and he wound up getting robbed, except the dude didn't have a weapon and was just insisting he give him the pizza. the person he was delivering to was outside his house and wound up telling his wife to get his shotgun. he aimed it at the dude and he ran away. dodged a bullet on that one, literally

[Reddog]

In my years of being a delivery boy, i stopped a domestic violence issue, saw many naked females, have been offered unsolicited sex in exchange for food, and aggressively attacked by a child with special needs.

[tankinator]

I've been delivering ever since I got my license (about 4 years now) and I've seen some crazy shit


1. Guy really down on his luck really wanted a pizza. Gave the exact coordinates, yes, coordinates, of where his tent was set up and had me deliver to it. Boss heard about this and refunded the guys order.


2. A goat farm. Hopped out of the car and was immediately swarmed by about 20 goats who smelled the pizza. Ran to the deck on the house that fortunately had dog gate, narrowly escaping a pack of hungry goats.


3. Saw plenty of "underdressed" people. Best one was this woman who was laying on her bed right next to the window... nude. Never got out of bed, just opened the window, handed me the cash and took the pizza.


4. House set back about a mile in the woods. Text the manager as soon as I pull up telling her to make sure I texted her back. 3 enormous, clearly aggressive Pitbulls and Rotweilers started circling my car, growling and scratching to get in. Not to mention the overwhelming stench of what I believed to be moonshine coming from the barn with a huge confederate flag nailed across the front. After calling the guy 3 times to no answer, I just honked the horn hoping to get someones attention. Dogs go crazy and some dude busts out the barn waving a shotgun yelling "what the hell you doing on my property" before seeing the pizza sign on the car and just going "oh yeah, I ordered pizza". Didn't think I'd live through that one. Dogs scratched up my car real good, my insurance company ended up getting $300 out of him for a new paint job.


5. Craziest thing I've seen which I hope was just someone playing a prank on me. I was doing DoorDash, and was out at midnight. Woman answered the door and seemed really timid, like she was being watched and didn't want to make the wrong move. She insists she give me a cash tip for delivering so late, even after I say she doesn't have to (her house was really creepy and I just wanted to get out of there) and runs inside, telling me wait on the porch while she gets cash. I sit there for about a minute and am about to just leave as I had another delivery to pick up, when I hear something rustling in the bushes in front of the porch, as if something is running through the bushes. At this point, I've decided I'd had enough and got up to leave when someone the size of a small girl with long black hair popped out of the bushes... with a damn knife. I yelled "oh fuck no" kicked the little demon person and bolted for my car. I got there and saw that thing running, trying to get behind the car. I just threw it in reverse and got the hell out of there not looking back or slowing down until I was at a well lit McDonalds. I really hope that was just someone pulling a really bad prank.


6. Best one I ever got was from a girl that I was talking to in high school. She called the shop and asked specifically for me to deliver to her. We've stayed as close friends ever since that ;)

[easycheese]

the magical duck at the end hit me in the feels cause my day is over.