Best “Bullet Fricking Dodged” Moments Ever

What is your "bullet fricking dodged" moment?

#Reddit #AskReddit

[Thunderchicken]

“I ran out of gas”
That’s not bad
“That wouldn’t be bad but I was flying a Cessna 152”
That’s pretty fucking bad

[chillwill]

If any of your friends seat you anywhere near your ex and/or the significant other of your ex at anytime and/or any place, especially at their wedding; you need new and better friends.

[koopaking]

I think if you're wife laughs at your freek out over a possible baby instead of flipping out she's a keeper... Although sounds like in this story he wasn't cheating on her so I think most/ some women would let it go...

[sequoyasierra]

The story about the pedestrian almost getting hit by the dead faced guy. People with Alzheimer's and dementia quite often get this look when they are zoned out due to their illness. You look in their eyes and it seems like nobody is there. A lot of time if you talk to them, they will just look at you or grin while looking at you with absolutely no comprehension in their eyes or on their face.

[fredfarquar]

My dad's story--not a bullet, but...
In the 1930's my dad was driving at night, following behind a logging truck stacked 12-13' high with huge tree trunks. He decided to pass, got ~1/3 of the way beside the trailer. He said 'something' kind of wordlessly screamed in his head "No!! Don't be here!!" and he stamped on the brakes, pulling in back of the truck and coming to a complete stop. The truck continued for ~100 feet when a holding chain broke with a tremendous CRACK!! and the entire load came down right where he would have been. He stayed there for awhile, smoking a cigarette and shaking. Bullet dodged.

[dryfox]

I’m sorry but flip the genders in the first story and boom, you have a “crazy stalker” and a restraining order. Behavior like that should be unacceptable regardless of gender.

[sirincompetent]

Once I was running down a brick road, and nothing seemed to be normal. I was almost at my goal, and I just had to go a little longer. Then, I knew I had to jump for some reason. It was a gut feeling. Instinctively, I did, and a bullet whizzed by, right where my head was a second ago. If I hadn't jumped right then, I would have died. That was one of my proudest moments when I played Super Mario Bros.

[pinstripesuitandheels]

I firmly believe addicts, unless they have committed a serious crime, should not be imprisoned, but instead sent to clinic to get sober.

[PaulDozierZZoMBiE]

Love how the robot voice says "years".

"yuerz"

[paxhumana]

12:21, at least you were smart and got yourself cleaned up in your life. My mother had to abandon an ex-husband because he was always a part of the wrong crowd, plus he did a LOT of evil, abusive, illegal, immoral, and corrupt things to her, as well as other people. She said, "different play mates, different playground", and that is honestly what you need in your life.

[globalpoliticsman]

The first woman was knots for those nuts

[machstormer]

Several years ago, our store ran out of a few items. Since we REALLY needed them right away, I had to go to one of our other stores to get what we needed.
I'll admit I was a little over the speed limit on my way back to our store, when a Sheriff's cruiser got behind me and hit their lights.
I had just pulled over and was waiting for the Deputy to get out of their cruiser, when a car full of teens (I think) drove by at high speed. But that's not all they were doing, they were also lighting fire crackers & throwing them at other cars.
I found that out when one bounced off the cruisers' hood.
A voice came over the cruisers' PA telling me to slow down, then the Deputy took off sirens wailing.
I waited until it was safe, then got back onto the road.
I was passed by 3 more Deputies on my way back to our store.
It never made the news, so I have NO idea what happened afterwards.

[erinpriester]

That girl who stole the other girls crush certainly got a whopping dose of karma

[sarahkirchner]

4:25 I hope he got that friend a thank you gift because they probably wouldn't be alive today if not for her.

[kimmielizabeth]

My stepsister went to columbia with her friends. They're all irish. They went to a nightclub and late in the night, one of my stepsister's friends wanted to go home. My stepsister told her not to go alone and kept telling her that but the friend didnt listen. On her way home, a van pulled up and 2 men dragged her into the van. Miraculously, they stopped at a gas station and the back door in the van wasn't locked. She got out and sprinted and sprinted until she stumbled across a police station. She got home safe and now they're all back in ireland. But that friend has severe ptsd and has never went out of the country or a nightclub or bar ever again

[anjegorrell]

The commenter on the child weapon one had obviously never been headbutted in the face by a toddler.

[svenmorgenstern]

17:09 really depends on the child. Some can be used in place of tactical nukes.
Source: am a long time uncle. Not a father for obvious reasons.

[kevster]

Met some girl online who lived fairly close so I agreed to meet up with her at her place. Enter the day of, entering into a dilapidated house that looks like a drug den, her dad and his buddy playing Fortnite on the TV on a way too big torn up couch and definitely doing more than smoking weed, but I stuck through it as I joined her in her room in the basement. We hang out for a bit and things just aren't quite sitting. From the weird behavior she had now that we were in person (would cling to my arm, play-bite my shoulder, tried to pull me into her bed) to the amount of alcohol bottles that were clearly recently bought and drank that numbered more than both hands, I was really uncomfortable.

Then, she introduces her pet kitten, barely 6 months maybe, and this is what set me off. I love cats, I have 4 of them, one being a stray we brought in during a terrible winter. She wasn't treating the kitten like a pet, she kept treating them like an accessory. She literally never set them down, bounced them all around, pretended to put them on her shoulder, put them on my head even though they were trying to get free. I took the kitten from her and let them sleep in my lap, explaining that cats need sleep and especially kittens like this one. She just wouldn't fucking stop messing with the kitten. Mid talking, not even 5 minutes into the kitten's nap, she interrupts herself to yank the cat out of my lap and play-dance her. It went like this for another 30 minutes, easily, just not stopping with a very clearly upset kitten.

Had my buddy fake an emergency phone call to bail me out, though she did suspect it and I had to play it off. Turns out she had more issues, refused therapy and got kicked out of her house for her alcoholism and still tries to get back with me. My only regret is I didn't take the kitten from her and get her into a safer home.

[panagea]

I jumped into the air to put my backpack on top of a locker, and one of the locker doors swung out and I came down right on the corner. I was sure I just castrated myself. When the pain subsided enough that I could look, I found that I had missed hitting anything important by about 1/2 an inch. That was 1970, and it still gives me the cold shudders anytime I think about it.

[paxhumana]

5:09, I said this to another Reddit story on here, but it bears repeating, PLEASE GET SOME CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTORS, as doing so could quite literally save your life. Also, if you have devices that are like the ones that are in the story, either clean them or remove them from your houses, apartments, etc., as they can kill you. Thank you.