Redefining masculinity | Shane Horsburgh | TEDxCanberra

This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences. What might the world look like if we redefined masculinity? Shane Horsburgh shares his personal journey from a false identity of hyper masculinity to a new understanding of what it means to be a man.

Spending 17 years as a police officer at state and federal level, Shane Horsburgh thought he had a good grip on the world around him; including the perspectives he held, and the identity he formed as a result.

A highly trained operative in special operations and domestic counter terrorism, Shane experienced firsthand the devastating impact of violence and intolerance in society; especially those involving innocent children. He would often look at children impacted by violence and/or crime and think, ‘gee I hope someone comes along and shows them a different way of looking at life, so they don’t think this is all it has to offer’.

It wasn’t until he had left the police and headed to war-torn Iraq that a fortuitous conversation with an elderly Iraqi Muslim (known as the ‘Professor’) lifted the veil on his own, limited perspective. Little did he know…what he had wished for others was exactly what he needed?

Realising the macho laden, ego driven world he was operating in did not define who he was, he set about making massive changes in order to live a more peaceful existence. Ironically, in the midst a war-zone Shane’s conversation with the ‘Professor’ initiated a re-acquaintance with long-lost perspectives and practices; previously disguised by the masculine façade he thought he needed to make it in today’s world.

With local ACT charity Menslink, Shane is currently delivering a program to schools across the territory entitled Silence is Deadly. This initiative encourages young men to talk about any problems or hassles they may have as a normal part of growing up; aiming to reduce teenage pressures and the disturbing statistics on young male suicide in our community. Shane also talks to the young men about the image of what a ‘real man’ is, with the intention of busting manhood myths to create a more inclusive, accepting society.

His passion for helping others stay on roller-coaster ride of life has resulted in the publication of his autobiography, Fighting Blind, in 2012.

About TEDx, x = independently organized event In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

[victorjones]

In reading the comments to this Talk, it is amazing how offended some "men" are by a man who is merely describing his journey into being a more authentic version of himself. Why does his courage to challenge his identity strike such discomfort in some people? Their reactions are actually evidence of the toxic ego that is the subject of his Talk. I like the fact that Shane is able to connect with the emotional maturity and humanity written into the comparatively small "Yoda." Dominance is more celebrated than wisdom. Confidence is more important than knowledge. Wisdom and knowledge beget kindness human development. Men who think of women as lesser beings than men don't know much, if anything, about the history of women. Its not their fault entirely. Our society has deliberately left women out of the instruction of history. Brother Shane - Continue to develop your soul. Thanks for a great talk.

[homaha]

Reading some of the comments below, I can't help but laugh at the trolls and their attempt to preserve their masculine image by slandering the talk.
Though you are a few years my senior Shane, I have walked a similar path to what you have described. I was once a special operations medic, who had the misfortune of responding to a couple of particularly disturbing suicides and like yourself remember in those moments trying to push my emotions aside so that nobody would see my weakness.
It has been 5 years now since I have been out of the military and I am still having my battles with anxiety and my self image and sometimes feel like I have lost or fallen from the "hero" I used to be. To see you stand and confidently talk like you did, about what you did, gives me hope that I will someday be able to as well. Well done!

[acroyogawithdao]

redefining what a man looks like.  i want to be this man. loved this talk

[nikikoltai]

Wow absolutely loved this, brilliant ! Thank you so much !!

[MrJonesy]

Before this I had no idea what TED is..I probably still don't. But coming from the same State vocation..I understood what you said. Now days I have the time to sit and smell the roses once more. Very good 

[gabrielahansen]

message for anyone that gets angry when hearing this talk about men just being more authentic and true to themselves by being more connected to their feeling center:

Women LOVE guys that are full of feelings and talking about them. That's honesty. And authenticity.
Also, girls, pay for your shit. Guys are amazing in their full emotional complexity and that's human nature that should be embraced. Any girl that would tear you down for being a human being, is an idiot!

[lancewalker]

Your redefinition of masculinity is pretty well established, its called femininity. Redefining masculinity as femininity, what a wonderful idea.

[seanhoward]

The women in the audience love Shane because he was the essence of masculinity.  They love him more because he became sensitive, but they loved him initially because he was masculine.  He says we need to redefine masculinity for 50% percent of the population, but in truth we need to redefine masculinity for 100% of the population.

[HumanResearch]

Am I the only one that found this useful? I thought he touched on great points there about building more solid relationships with his ex-wife and how pre-conceived images of masculinity would mean being seething with jealousy, rather than accepting and respectful. Could have done without the path less chosen line at the end, but a good effort and I got a lot from this. Thanks

[joshuadaltilia]

I've often made too much of an effort myself to create too much of a big male ego with in myself in my life time due to how strongly I want people to view me as very masculine, especially for women to see me that way

[BeGlamourlicious]

What a great guy. He didn’t used to be but he really changed.... that is something pretty rare.

[sretuft]

What is up with the commenters on this TEDx talk? Was this talk shared on 4chan or something?

[vedranlekic]

The next generation that Socrates whined about ended up destroying Athens with their inability to defend Athens from the newly emerging patriarchal masculine Macedonian empire.

[donkzilla]

such a great talk, so true. has helped me so much already :) thank you my friend.

[jamieholmes]

To me this talk is not so much about masculinity. It's about "the warrior" who found the "lover" inside of himself, if we talk in Jung terms. All masculinity is different. All men should learn to connect with the feminine inside of them selves.

[danwilliamson]

MEN protect women and children and OLD people. We love (as well as lust). We try to be fair and we learn.

[jeanpaulgartier]

Masculinity is muscular, stoic and responsible.

[johnculley]

In the United States masculinity has been under threat ever since Vietnam veterans were spat upon when they returned from the Vietnam war. Of the 58, 272 persons listed on the Vietnam memorial wall only eight are women.

[dporangecounty]

Outstanding example of an "Evolved Man"!

[ZapatosVibes]

So many insecure men in the comments section of these videos. It's perfectly okay to be strong and manly while still being connected with your emotions. If you need to physically dominate others, including women, to feel manly, then you aren't a man : just a sad little boy in a man's body.