James Hetfield: 'I am the table'

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James Hetfield from Metallica — insisting on him being a table.
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Metallica 1984: "I'm Creeping Death"
Metallica 2011: "I AM THE TABLE!!!!"

Beartallica
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Serj Tankian is coming to put his keys on you, James.

MFZFR
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Anthrax: I Am Th Law
Slayer: I Am The Anti-Christ
Megadeth: I Am The King
Metallica: I Am The Table

nightmuffin
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THE MASTER OF TABLES IS HOLDING YOUR DRINKS

sampson
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He's not a good table. He's not a bad table. He's THE TABLE!

ArnauPuig
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James:  "Say it...call me a table."
James' wife: "Honey, don't do this."
James: "SAY IT."
James' wife: *sigh* "Oh yeah, you're such a dirty table, give it to me"

Hugh_G_Rekshun
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I left the keys on him because I wanted too

MegaYoyo
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I am the table
I am the table
I am RICK HARRISON AND THIS IS MY PAWN SHOP

bogi
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James Hetfield: Honey, do you like my new guitar?
Francesca Hetfield: You are a table, darling.
James: I CAN DREAM, HAROLD!!

pseudoriginal
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"put all of your stuff on me, because I AM THE TABLE. Do your homework on me because I AM THE TABLE. eat food on me because I AM THE TABLE. I AM- I AM -- I THE TABLE"

jordanlarsen
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Calm down, James, no one is saying you're not the table, chill.

CanalDoRyu
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Semantic satiation (also semantic saturation) is a psychological phenomenon in which repetition causes a word or phrase to temporarily lose meaning for the listener, who then perceives the speech as repeated meaningless sounds.

PaulMercedes
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another brilliantly written song from James Hetfield!

AngrySloth
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They say Arthur Knights used to join in a Round James Hetfield in ancient times.

LEONINMusic
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This was said by Metalhead Maniac in the comments of a video of Slayer's The Antichrist:

Slayer: I AM THE ANTICHRIST
Anthrax: I AM THE LAW
Megadeth: I AM THE KING
Metallica: I AM THE TABLE

poromise
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How does Kirk manage to hold such a huge guitar in the image?

lukedavison
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Some table that won't break in a wrestling match:

isiaharellano
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*1997 - Say Fuck No James*
*2011 - Say Fuck No Table*

ironhammer
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it seems James finally woke up, grabbed a brush and put a little makeup, and hid the scars to fade away the shakeup. I'm proud of him!

americanbagel
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what's with mini-Kirk in the background? lol

xKiLLMUSiC