The Soloists - A Conversation with Mallory Everton and Diana Brown

Today, we’re thrilled to welcome Mallory Everton–a comedian, actor, and writer–and Diana Brown–the new Associate Director for Faith Matters, to the podcast. We’re diving into a conversation that’s often overlooked but so important—being single in the church. Diana and Mallory are launching a new podcast on the Faith Matters Podcast Network called The Soloists, where they’ll be talking about singleness and relationships, and what it's like trying to form families in today’s cultural and technological environment and we couldn’t be more excited to celebrate it with them.

In this episode, we explore why they’ve dedicated so much energy to this project. As they discuss, being single can be an isolating experience, especially in a culture that often views marriage as the ultimate milestone. Diana and Mallory share deeply personal stories about what it’s like to navigate a church community where singleness sometimes feels like a problem to be solved rather than a valid and whole way of being, and season or situation of life that all of us, no matter our marital status, can authentically relate to in some way.

They also challenge us to rethink our assumptions about singleness. They point out that being single isn’t just a transitory state—it’s a real and meaningful part of life for so many people; more than half of the adult members of the church, in fact, according to Elder Gong in '21. We discuss how important it is to move beyond the idea that marriage is the only path to fulfillment and how embracing singleness can lead to profound spiritual growth.
Diana and Mallory bring a wealth of wisdom to this conversation, and their insights will resonate with anyone who’s felt the pressure to fit into a specific life narrative. This episode is a powerful reminder that each of us is on a unique journey, and that there’s deep value in every stage of life, whether single, married, or somewhere in between.

We hope this conversation encourages you to see singleness—and all life paths—with fresh eyes. And with that, we’ll jump right into our discussion with Diana and Mallory.

[write-only]

Glad to hear that. Mallory, I'm on my way.

[jessican]

In my 20’s I rented a room in college from an amazing woman that became one of my favorite people ever. She was 10+ years older than me had so much life experience and was an amazing friend and fantastic landlord and roommate. Many years later she did get married to an amazing man. I’m so grateful for all that she taught me and for our friendship. I don’t know what I would have done without her in that time if my life. I think everyone’s experience is important no matter if it fits a typical mold or not.

[sharangainor]

Such good information, thoughts and spirit. Every Bishopric and RS presidency needs to listen to this.

[JeffreyWindsor]

"What if this person is 100% on their path?" is such a great perspective. Instead of seeing a person's trials as an evidence of their weakness/poor judgement/burden, but as an important and necessary step in their growth and development on the path to exaltation. And maybe/sometimes/perhaps a person's trials are the result of their own bad choices, but that's not my role to decide. The Prodigal Son made it home a wiser and humbler man, and the elder brother who never left learned nothing. My role is to engage with each one in a Christlike manner, and He, I am confident, would treat them as if they are somewhere in the middle of their path toward great things.

[Divineheart]

Are we getting a link to their podcast soon?

[tamoramuir]

I love Mallory's comment about coming to a place of balance between being happy and complete single, but not closing yourself off to the blessings of sealing in this life either. Nor to other reasons for a happy partnership.

I love also her comment that it's not just the doctrine of the Church that teaches us that we should marry, but also biology. We're wired to continue our species--meaning we have physical desire. We're wired to be social creatures, too. The vast majority of people marry (or partner), no matter their faith. Mentally, spiritually, physically, emotionally, and socially, human beings are set up to pair off. And when we don't, or if our pairing ends, it's hard.

I love that we can ask about adventures or the news in someone's life, rather than "are you dating anyone?" or "Oh, I can't ask about their romantic life, because they're too old, that would be insensitive" as if being single was a terminal disease.

[dcrbdh]

I live in a region where there are not a lot of members of the church. My biggest pet peeve is when visiting general authourities come in and say something like "all my kids served missions, and have married in the temple". I'm like "cool" glad for you, but I'm not gonna get that.

[dohnmoore]

This is a truth, be who you are believing in you, love yourself!!! Continue to grow and love Our faith. If you are honest.... open.. you will not fear rhe approaching the relationship when it is entering the first meeting or conversation. Some people when I first meet them weather they are educated or just a beautiful person have a lot going for them fear creeps in the fear of man I really want this and I don't want to blow it. So I have found to be genuine and not pressing because I do not feel what they are feeling at that moment. Other times I meet or talk on the phone like I have know this person for years but then we are so busy that there is not enough time to culture the relationship.

[dohnmoore]

Im widowed and at the point to creat a place were we can live all together. I found that a lot of people do not find the time to share yourself with others without trying to find a partner. I'm open and can talk about anything when I approach I feel that they feel I'm hitting on them.

[JesseBardsley]

I'm a 36-year-old man, and I've never felt that marriage should be my number one priority. It's been kind of strange, because while I accept the doctrine of the church that marriage is, ultimately, a pinnacle experience, it has always been kind of like Diana described in the interview: I feel God saying that it is not the thing I should be focusing on currently. If you were to ask me things that I am the most excited about, I could tell you several ways that I hope to serve and contribute to the world, but "marriage" as a generalized concept wouldn't be one of them. I get excited about certain people that I could potentially marry: there have been women that I have tried to pursue and been very excited about and attracted to. But it feels like the excitement is only for those particular people, and not for the general idea of marriage as a goal (don't know if that makes sense -- more opportunistic than general). I get much more excited about other ways to contribute in a general goal-oriented sense, and feel spiritually called to them in a way I don't feel about marriage. In saying all this, I'm not trying to say that this experience is a superior one, just a different one.

[ymacaston]

I was married for 42 years. We are married forever but. … Marriage is not the goal, love affection, care for each other, desire, that feeling of security, comfort and wholeness. That is the goal. That comes first and the marriage follows after. So it is obvious that marriage is not something to be attained, not a gospel principle to be ticked off. “Let us not to the marriage of true souls admit impediment”. Marriage is the culmination of the blessing of love, not the beginning of it. We shall all receive our partner, if not in this section of eternity, in the next so “pray always and be believing”. Enrich this life, enjoy this life, don’t turn it into a waiting for that which may not happen. Your star may be elsewhere and your time be out of time itself and within eternity. Fear not and be believing. All things will truly work together for our good.

[tamoramuir]

Only certain areas have single's wards, either YSA or mid or older singles. Only Utah, as far as I know, has all of those. In other parts of the US, and internationally, YSA wards aren't common. Even in Arizona, where there's a significant LDS population, it's mostly just YSA wards with occasional activities and conferences for the older groups. When we lived in a branch in Missouri, there were lovely and strong single sisters whom we loved and who loved us, meaning the whole branch family. They held leadership callings, they did a lot for us. In a branch, you need every active member, and you're always reaching out to the less active ones. I felt like our branch was very close-knit, with people of all ages, genders, and marital statuses. But I can also see like moving out there might have felt like closing the door to any possibility of meeting a potential partner. Which is fine, if that's where God led them. Certainly I never asked about it. But I love that Diana points out that her directon from God has NOT been toward marriage, at least not up until now.

I have noticed that currently, Sister Yee of the RS General Presidency is single. I don't believe she has ever been married. Wendy Watson Nelson was single well into her sixth decade, when she married President Nelson. There have been multiple RS Presidents, presidencies, and General Board members who have never been married or been divorced or widowed. I think perhaps the Lord needs them to serve in the capacity they are in, and part of that is being single, at least at that point in time. While we certainly don't believe that being single is a higher, holier calling than being married, we certainly do believe that if you seek the Lord's direction, you will will be guided to the most holy callings that he needs you to magnify, either formally or informally.