If Organic Food Was Honest - Honest Ads

If organic food farms were honest, here's what they'd tell you about "eating clean"

CAST:
Roger Horton: Jack Hunter
Clown: Jesse Eisemann
Morton: Eli Yuden

Director: Michael Strauss
Director of Photography: Rob Menzer
Producer: Michael Strauss
Writer: Jesse eisemann
Editor: Gabrielle Williott
Colorist: Rob Menzer
Sound: James Azzaretti
Camera Assistant: Rachel Mossberg
Production Assistant: Jesse Eisemann

Sources:

Honest Ads Honest Commercials commercial parody were honest

[adamestrada]

As someone who used to work for a food manufacturer who made USDA certified "organic" food, I can definitely confirm that when the USDA reps came, they literally just accept self-reported data without even inspecting the facilities. Easiest payday ever for those guys.

[icedriver]

LOL "Organic poison is still poison" Best line ever

[empiricalsmut]

Bonus points if the organic packaging has brand names like "Ol' Trusty Luke's Family Farm", in lowercase handwritten font, with earthy color pallets, and the "story" of the company on the back, signed "Your Friend, Trusty Luke"

[matthiasmortier]

"Organic poison is still poison".
Exactly.

When a snake bites your leg, you don't say "No worries, it's organic!".

[tonythetigersmuggler]

Can confirm,

I worked in a heath food grocery store for two years and got to really see behind the curtain on the food and everything Roger says is spot on .


It used to crack me up to see people buying nothing but junk food while thinking they’re being healthy and ethical cuz of a label and price. Those places are basically pretentious grocery stores for upper middle class people to feel superior.

[richardbranton]

I actually have a friend that worked at an organic farm. He goes to large commercial farms and buys vegetables then takes them to farmers markets and sells them. He tells everyone that they are organic and that they are grown on the farm he works on. People would actually tell him how much better his vegetables were than the vegetables at the grocery store and they were the exact same as the ones at the grocery store. He finally got caught and lost his job over it but he did it for years

[ktm]

I spent years helping with my uncle's dairy farm. It wasn't "organic" but it was small, the cows were vaccinated and treated very well. It was on the top end in grading, meaning it was kept pretty spotless and the big names bought milk from him. We didn't need fancy terminology or buzzwords, just honest cleanliness.

[MetalWolfz]

I also despise how people equate "all natural" with good and "artificial" with bad. Cyanide is all natural

[WastedTalent-]

You guys should do a commercial about farmer's markets. They're supposed to be local farmers selling their own crops but a lot of people buy wholesale produce and sell it there.

[ennuiblue]

Why is Roger the coolest Edgelord of every generation? 🥰

[jamesburleson]

The funniest one I ever saw was organic maple syrup. Literally the only difference was the paperwork and the absence of the dairy derived anti-foaming agent used in exceedingly small quantities to control bubbles during the boiling process. It cost twice as much as the normal stuff.

[rebeccahicks]

"And yuppies love that. For some reason." He doesn't buy into it himself, but he knows what sells! This old farmer is also a good businessman.

[AT-rkfv]

Please never stop doing this. It's some of the best education I can offer to my kids.

[TheLiberalMissionary]

Some great lines in this video: Our cheese balls were hand poofed by artisan elves up in the Keebler tree. So you'll feel like Popeye. And my favorite: You'll feel like Captain God damn planet!

[Dr.Warren]

As someone with a PhD and BS in Horticulture he is 100% accurate. Organic is a buzz word used to get people to pay more for groceries and requires more inputs and resources than traditional agriculture.

[theivanivanka]

I'm so happy that Roger got his own channel, it's the only channel that keeps my sanity

[TheVersipelis]

As a personal organic farmer and a former HazMat technician, I would much rather have BT (a harmless bacteria) sprayed on my vegetables than a repeated application of organophosphates to control caterpillars. I’d rather use harmless DE to control bugs than benzene ring organophosphates. My preferred fertilizer is bat guano and not the slightly radioactive phosphates.

[ShermanT.Potter]

I was a certified organic corn and soybean producer for a few years. The paperwork/certifiers are insane/ineffective. When you sell a load of corn for example, you need to have an "audit trail", which consists of the field record stating how many bushels were harvested, the bin register showing when the crop was put in the bin and how much on that day, a lot number for the load to be sold, an off farm transportation cleaning affadavit to show the semi was cleaned before organic use, and a bill of lading. But none of that matters, as the certifiers don't come out at harvest time to estimate yields, so you literally could mix in chemically raised corn in your bin, and alter the paperwork. I didn't do that, but someone in my state did, I think they did over a million dollars worth of it. A certifier writing down on the paperwork that I used herbicides by my house, when it is a MILE AWAY from the organic fields. An arbitrary "crop buffer" of 25ft. when organic crops are raised by chemically treated crops, when volatility can send herbicide a much greater distance than that. The ability to plant "non-gmo non-organic" seed, but only if you fill out a form showing you attempted to get those varieties in organic (which might not even exist), then they just put pressure on you to use organic seed, but as far as I remember there wasn't any repercussions. I could get into the environmental aspects of burning insane amounts of diesel fuel for organic weed control, and soil loss due to wind blowing soil away during tillage, but that would make this post even longer. Glad I did it for a life experience, but I'm glad I don't do it any longer.

[samuski]

I grew up on a farm where 90% of everything we ate we grew and raised ourselves. We used both commercial and natural fertilizer (compost), we saved all our chicken pig and cow poop and use it. I can tell you this for certain: All the food I grew up eating was far higher quality and tasted far better than anything you can get in a grocery store today.

[rebwarwar]

Guy who hauled the treated sewage for wheat farmers said he would always tell the idots from Seattle " You shit we spread, send it back in your bread "
Love it 😅