What age is it okay to let my baby 'cry it out'?

A lot of parents wonder about what age it's okay to let their babies cry it out. The literature is not specific about this. There is no certain age when they say it's okay to let your baby cry it out. I think this is a good conversation to have with your baby's doctor because they can talk to you about your baby's health history, their overall growth, and talk to you about whether or not night feedings are still necessary. For example, if your baby was still really small then extra night feedings may be necessary and letting your baby cry it out wouldn't be a good idea. So the doctor can talk to you about your individual circumstances and if they give you the green light then crying it out has actually been proven to be one of the most effective ways to get your baby to sleep through the night. It usually takes about 4-7 days and it's really tough when you're going through it. I just did it with my son but ear plugs are a great thing. After their brains have kind of reset they'll stop waking up at night and even if they do wake up on their own they'll learn how to go back to sleep by themselves without you, which is great. So I do always recommend though to parents that they always check on their babies if they're concerned. You kind of know your child's cry. They may be crying because they're in need of comfort, in which case you'd feel like you can ignore it. But if you feel like your baby is in pain or sick or in danger for any reason then definitely make sure you check on your baby. For example, I was having this same conversation with my pediatrician and he mentioned that even him, a pediatrician, was letting his baby cry it out when they were young and ignored their baby when they had a raging fever. You always want to make sure they're okay. If all is well then you can continue to let your baby cry and again, after 4-7 nights their brain should reset and you should all be sleeping better after that. Good luck with everything and if you have any other questions for me feel free to ask them on our Facebook page and recommend us to your friends and family too.

[EpicSprint]

We have a rule at my house if the baby is crying at night we check on everything from hunger to diaper to fever, see if their hurt. If not then we check one more time on the feeding cause sometimes they don't take the bottle when they're crying . After that we let them cry. They usually stop after a bit a fall asleep. It's not cruel at all it's called parenting

[Strawn]

Some parents have to work, and need to prepare the infant for childcare. In Texas, the infant ratio is ten infants to two teachers. Do you honestly think the infant teachers will be able to rock each baby every time they need to sleep? It’s not realistic, and it will make your babies transition very difficult.

[TheLostCat]

It seems people who jump on the abandonment wagon can't tell the difference between protest crying and emotional crying. Most baby cries are PROTEST cries. They are not harmful, AT all. In fact a child that does not protest cry does not learn to self soothe either. The more you coddle your baby and give in to their wants that borderline needs, you prevent them from learning to trust themselves. Wanting to be rocked to sleep, or have a pacifier put back in mouth to sleep, or be held to sleep are more in the line of desires/comfort items, rather than actual needs for survival and to thrive.

[ritzcarlton]

My daughter is 18 months now and is experiencing the “terrible twos” early. She cries when she can’t get her way. And throws tantrums. The moment I noticed her change in behavior I knew I had to break her out of it. And one way is letting her cry when she can’t have her way. I tell her “I’m gonna let u cry cuz u feel like you need to” and she cries. Then she realizes it doesn’t work and I’m not paying her any attention then she stop. I notice she cries for less time now. You have to be firm cuz these kids can be master manipulators if you play their game.
“To discipline your child is to love your child”

[xzt]

I think it is funny how many people love to jump on the bandwagon of "letting your kid cry it out is abandonment, the infant will shut down and learn no one cares". That's silly.. you know when your baby does not need anything and is crying just to be fussy or has just developed habits for sleep that are unhealthy. It is not healthy to coddle the baby and have him wake up every few hours just because he is used to doing it and getting fed/passifier/mommy/etc to go back to sleep. The better you can get your baby to sleep through the night the better for both of you. Some tough love for a few nights can make it better for both the baby and the mom.

[emaleemorton]

My parents as well as my husbands parents did the cry it out method, we both turned out fine, you must listen to your baby, know that he or she is fine, you don't just put them down and leave. Some of y'all are being a little crazy.

[_NEWRA_]

I'd say let them cry it out when they cry to get there way. (Manipulation crying)

[ravenID]

I wasn't sleeping through the night still at a year old, so my parents did the method where they came in to comfort me and then waited a little longer the next time until I learned to soothe myself, and then I ended up sleeping great for my entire childhood lol

[ifpassionisacrime]

What proof do we have that the brain resets? What does that even mean?

[brandenhuffmen]

To any *parents* that can help me:

My son is now 2. He's been co-sleeping with his father and I since he was younger. I know that i should've done the "cry it out" method early on but i always felt safe with him in our bed when he was younger and another reason he slept with us was because he wouldn't sleep until he was in the bed with us and at the time i was overwhelmed with no help at all while his father worked so it just felt easier to let him sleep with us. Now that he's older, he is either kicking me and his father in the head or elbowing us in the face while we're all asleep and it's gotten uncomfortable to sleep with him now. I personally feel like this mothod is too late to try now given the fact that he's so used to getting what he wants by sleeping with us that he would probably never stop crying or have a panick attack. We tried for about 20mins one time and he lost it and it only got worse, not better so we gave up on that. We have his baby shark bed in our room and lay him in it when he falls asleep but he always wakes up 30 minutes later crying and we try to put him back to sleep but he'll just get more upset so we just put him in our bed and he'll go right back to sleep. Someone that knows what they're talking about, please help if you have any tips for any other method that is meant for clingy emotional kids because my boy is a mommas boy and knows that me or his father will always come to his becking call.

[christianaldrich]

What if there 2 and 4? And my gf dosnt put them to bed tell around 10-11. And gives them pop and sips of her coffee and they cry and wine for there sippy cup and don't shut up until u get up and hand it to then. Even if it's right next to them. Then whay wine and cry until u get up and set it down.. please help.. I'm about to leave this girl unless things change.. bad parenting

[odysseus]

Hey nurse dani, my nine month old can't stand being put in the crib or the play pen while I do chores around the house. I'm not planning on keeping her there for extended periods of time. Like 15-20 minutes a time. But the second I put her down and walk out of sight she goes nuts. I'm don't know if it's harmful or helpful to let her cry and I want the best for her but as a dad I'm not sure if I'm being cold. Any advice would be great. Thanks in advance and thanks for all the great videos.

[shasiti]

Sometimes you HAVE to let them cry it out! If they are full, warm, dry and there is nothing else wrong, let them cry, they have to learn at a very young age that you will not run and pick your child up the minute they make a sound. A lot of babies are spoiled rotten at 2 or 3 months old because if you do not pick them up they know, daddy, grandma, grandpa, auntie, uncles, well you get the picture!! SPOILED!!!

[CaringParentsTV]

Sure you can sleep-train your baby, but at what cost? Your baby learns she can't trust you to be there for her when she needs you & she goes to sleep with her system full of stress hormones. If your heart doesn't tell you it's cruel to let babies cry, then listen to the neuroscientists that tell us that babies need attuned, responsive parenting for their brains & stress-response systems to develop well and to reduce the risk of later depression & anxiety. Check out "Parenting for a Caring World"

[amberosborne]

Never we are the only species that don’t go to our babies when they are distressed if my baby needs comfort she will get it