THRIFTING ALONE IN NYC (i’m going through an identity crisis)

I'm undergoing a style/identity/confidence crisis. So i went thrifting :p

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[gaiadaqueen]

girl, I literally follow you because I think your style is unique lol. maybe you don't get it cause you don't see yourself from other peoples prospective. but trust me, you stand out and I'm sure that people on the street notice your outfit aswell + I love your hair. love from italy <33

[magikay_]

i can relate to that. you're style doesn't have to be "unique", it just has to be a part of you. the real you. i always thought you were fashionable. i hope you feel more like yourself soon <3

[xphenylalaninex]

basic is unique in a way babes. your style can change everyday, you don't have to look a certain vibe all the time. you don't need other people's attention, you only need to know that everything that makes you you are what matters individually.

[carlylam]

Dude I relate to this problem so much and I feel like I'm going through the same thing. I only ever feel confident when I dress up/well, but right now I don't know what clothes/style makes me look best (if that makes any sense) or good even. I feel like clothing used to help me feel so confident but now it will make or break my day. Thanks for bringing this up because I thought I was being dramatic <3

[morgansai]

i’m so happy that you posted this video because it’s a very common feeling to put your self-worth into things that just do not define you. i appreciate you for this video & i hope you understand how cool you are, because of who you are ♡ ♡

[mmiakim]

it's so crazy how much of our confidence is rooted in how we feel towards our own looks, whether it be through fashion, hair, or weight. although i also feel the same way, it's hard to not get caught up on those feelings and tear ourselves down. but in reality, i think we're all too harsh on ourselves. like many other people commenting, i think that your sense of style is so well-put together and unique that i sometimes think, "oh only she could think of an outfit like this or pull this off". you really are amazing so please remember to give yourself the credit you deserve. <3

[ambersodyssey]

I’m going through this at 26, because I don’t look like a teenager anymore but I also don’t want to give off super mature vibes. I’ll save that for mid 30s lol it’s a crisis 😭😂

[Anne_fka_XATMx]

I'm late to the party but this is such an interesting topic, honestly. We're constantly bombarded with pictures of influencers and trends, and aesthetics and vibes and it can be difficult to figure out whether you actually like something for yourself or whether you just like something on someone else, or because you just think 'this is what the cool people are wearing and I also want to be part of that crowd'. It's really easy to impulse buy stuff, and then never wear it because it looked great on someone else, and it's just not really 'our own' style. Or practical. Here's my take and how I am figuring out what I want to wear: (but I mostly wrote this to think about it myself so sorry for taking up comment space haha, its ok if no one ever reads it!!!!)

Influencers have the time (and money) to build outfits and make the best, creative, flattering photos, with awesome brands, often with sponsorships (so things can be expensive). And maybe they don't have to stand on their feet all day for their work, so they can wear heels or something revealing or whatever. That's their real job, to inspire us with creative ways of looking at fashion, to share new and cool brands and ideas around trends, aesthetics, vintage or sustainability. An important thing here of course is that next to this, which I think is very valuable, it's also marketing with product placement, aiming at selling a lot of clothes to their viewers. Which is what we have to be conscious of.

I try really hard nowadays to firstly not do any impulse buys, to really picture wearing something outside (to work, on free days, vacation, parties, etc), and whether I would feel like myself (and comfortable) wearing it in 'real life', specifically my own life. Which doesn't involve a lot of cool events or red carpets (or hot weather). It's not always bad to buy something just because it beautiful of course, you can also enjoy fashion as an aesthetic thing instead of it always having to be practical.

Then secondly, I've been trying to really think about what suits me and what fashion builds up my identity and I what I feel myself in. For example, for me that would be early exposure to skate culture/hiphop (I'm a millennial hehe. so dickies, vans, oldschool styles of adidas and nike, streetwear), menswear (blazers, knits, academia grandpa style), but also pinks/poofy/girly, 90s/00s.. which also corresponds to how I feel day by day, sometimes I feel more feminine and chill to wear a dress (which makes me feel a bit vulnerable at times), sometimes I need a protective layer and wear looser stuff, or I feel a bit more 'boyish' that day, or I really need a balance of feminine/masculine vibes that day, etc. Figuring out what colors I feel most myself in also really helped. And don't forget you can have and mix many aesthetics, pretty much no one is just one thing. And we also constantly change, as does our style and what we have a need for (comfort, quiet or actually standing out and experimenting).

[AngelTrazo]

I loved hearing the story of your fashion journey, especially as another quiet Asian girl in high school who got known for her cute outfits / being the fashionable one. Fashion (especially styling hand-me-downs & thrift store finds, since I was lower income and that was the only way I could afford new clothes) definitely became part of my identity because of those years. And it’s so true that there are moments when you lose your sense of style because you lose touch with yourself, but you’ll find that joy in your style again! Like with life there’s always ups and down. Thank you for taking us along your journey

[shyBP]

My friend was going through a moment where she hated her hair after she paid enormous amounts of money for it to get done. So then she obviously started talking about how bad it looks so don't be discouraged that you're not the only one experiencing this problem. But it made me think of the time where this girl in middle school said that her hair plays a big role in her mood. Which is literally so we look at ourselves all the time so it's easy for us to put ourselves down on our appearances. Other people might not think your style is basic/un-unique because there's a lot of unstylish people out there! So be more compassionate with yourself and try not to think what you deem is important in your life as ~stupid~ Identity is what makes us who we are so don't water yourself down or discredit your style journey. I suggest writing down 10 things you like about your style and that way you'll grow an even deeper appreciation to your identity in the fashion aspect!!! Love your content :)

[lavenderixi]

to me, i think your style stands out, that’s the main reason i started following you but it’s understandable to feel that way when you’re surrounded with different people and environment

[estrellasjournal]

no because I’ve been feeling the same way. I’ve been obsessing over having a certain style and vibe just to feel good about myself. It is a huge part of my identity as well.

[unnoticed]

for me, confidence is not only tethered to how you look externally but how you feel internally and if you dont feel good in either aspect then maybe its good to try and take a step back so that you can regain the lost understanding of who you are and who you want to present yourself as. even if you are wearing "basic" or "copycat" outfits of other people, you are still unique in the fact that you put the outfit together and added your own touch/flair to it. the uniqueness stems from what you do with what you have, rather than what it looks like. kind of like if its a basic outfit but theyre pieces you love yk, its something that is unique to you because of how toy feel about it and what you did with it.

tldr: everyones unique and you dont need to prove anything to anyone in order to show your uniqueness. how you feel right now might just be something you need to work on, but that doesnt mean that itll be a forever thing. you make things what you want them to be :)

sending all the love !! your hair looks amazing and i love your style too !! <3

[hhhhgggh]

this made me feel validated like i’ve felt like this before and i’m glad i’m not the only one. thank you <3

[mehdimisba]

your video was honestly so relatable. I literally felt the same as you. Really glad I found your channel

[joedyisonfire]

I feel you. I started trying to find my style in 8th grade, and now I’m starting senior year, and I’m still struggling. I feel like the wind blows and I suddenly want to dress in a different style. I’m honing in on my true niche, but it’s going to take awhile. Perhaps my whole life- but people are always changing, so of course our taste changes, too.

[sofiaruffiner]

Girl, I feel u when you say you find comfort in walking around department store shopping when u already walked in knowing you are not going to buy one item. Whenever I feel stressed and I want to unwind myself and feel safe, I do that :)

[graciehart]

Wow dude I resonate this what you say in this video so much, from a young age I remember constantly changing outfits in order to find something that was cute or better and never feeling like I had anything to wear because my style was consistently changing which only got worse the older I became because I was influenced by other styles and so what I’m wearing can depict my mood so drastically and it leads be to have breakdowns because I don’t know what to wear or I feel like what I want to wear is too much somehow, but I really loved this video it’s nice to know that I am not the only person who has struggled with self confidence issues due to clothing, you are so beautiful and unique I wish you the best of luck

[lavender]

I relate to this so much, been hating my hair and my clothes lately and I feel like I'm stuck with no freedom of my style. Hope your doing better xx

[jessica_gomes]

Girl, I'm going throught the same about my style, and I thought I was being stupid, but now I know I wasn't. Thank you for sharing it!