What You're Getting Wrong About Narcissists

Do you know what you're getting wrong about narcissists? And this mistake has really cost Dr. Kerry and many like her.

In this live, Dr. Kerry will explain:

1. The most common mistake most of us are getting wrong when dealing with narcissists.
2. The biggest error often made when handling conflict with narcissists.
3. The best practical strategies to have with narcissists so you can experience greater peace.

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IF YOU ARE A RISK of immediate danger or abuse, please get in touch with the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233.

DISCLAIMER: All content and information on this website is for informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute mental health advice. Although I strive to provide accurate general information, the information presented here is not a substitute for professional advice, and you should not rely solely on this information. Always consult a professional in the area for your particular needs and circumstances before making any professional, legal, medical, financial, or tax-related decisions.
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Want to read a true story of narcissistic abuse?
LOVE YOU MORE: The Harrowing Tale of Lies, Sex Addiction, & Double Cross

Stay in Touch with Me!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., a mental health clinician, is a narcissistic abuse survivor and an expert on cultivating healthy relationships, deconstructing narcissism, and understanding various other mental health-related issues.

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*As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases at no cost to you as the customer.

[djmw]

I just never knew there was such evil in the world. I truly believed that all people are good. I had to learn the truth.

[steadypace]

The covert narcissist would be in a foul mood raising his voice and swearing etc but could switch in an instant acting polite and over friendly when answering a phone call or greeting other's at home or out and about. These narcissist's are two-faced quite evil and they know exactly what they are doing.🎭

[lisap]

I cant wrap my head around their inability to answer a question...dancing around it and you never get a conclusion in s talk...or whatever its called.

[mwatkins]

Psychiatrist here. So appreciate your vulnerability about physical, mental and emotional health! Also, 11 shoe 👟 here myself! Keep doing your life’s work!! 😊

[jillplott]

I really like your program and enjoy listening to you. I am happy to have found you. Thank you!

[lisap]

The lack of compassion amazes me. Id be crying, feeling sad that our relationship is falling apart and his reply is showing jow annoyed he is with all of this and "here we go again." Its foreign to me.
And trying to approach them 10 different wys to have a 4:54 needed conversation is a waste of precious time. And my favorite - After hours of verbal abuse they come into the room you're in and ask for something they need! And they've adopted the sweetest voice ever! Fall for it everytime! Probably out of relief to stop the fighting for 5 minutes.😂

[personanongrata]

39:30 The ones I know get angry that you haven't completely forgotten what they did to you, and they act like YOU are the one who's effed up, and they lay as much guilt on you as you will accept.

[iw]

So our greatest gifts are used against is😢😮. I feel so tired from the games.

[OccupationalThpy]

Shoe size 11 here, it’s occasionally frustrating to me (I can’t pack multiple pairs of shoes for vacation unless I bring an absolutely giant suitcase) but I’ve never felt ashamed, so when men I dated tried to needle me on it, I just laughed. I’m 5’11, why would I have teeny feet?!?!?! But those creeps often figured out my vulnerabilities eventually. It’s interesting that many people are so base and manipulative that they’ll assume (or correctly guess) something bothers you and try to figure out what exactly bothers you so they can gain the upper hand. Equanimity is now my most powerful tool. Anyway, I love your hair. I never would guess you wear a wig. Thank you for your open explanation. Shame withers in sunlight :)

[Guddilove]

Omg !! This is how i live my life thinking evryone has the natural goodness in their heart. It sounds so painful to keep up with the way narcs think. My husband uses my emotional intelligence always and is a narc who doesnt show empthy and compassion. thank you so much for shedding the light . I couldnt have ever worked this out how they think.

[elainesmith]

I discovered for myself, that I was too passive over the years. It became easier to just go along without a fight. A sad resolution, but it worked for a long time. He has died, and am working on this with a therapist. Learning to say NO with calmness and not explaining why. Lifevis much better now. I feel more in control of my life.

[personanongrata]

i cant believe how luminous this is. where were you when I needed you, 50 uyears ago?

[Shirley-tb]

I never knew that was a wig its lovely. God love you i lost hair i got a thyroid prob after narc abuse husband.
Those freeks will get there kalma.

[PR-kdsc]

I would call it naiveté, sometimes you have no choice but to do the hard thing

[angelawade]

I get so excited when I listen to you I can hardly listen to the end. I want to jump right up a fix things NOW. You so motivate me.

[Lynn-dm]

I am not austistic but my emotional intelligence is the same thing as yours. I grew up with a Narcissistic Mom so I learn to be shy, quiet, and be a good girl.i am congenital. I was shocked to find out the evil in the world. I married a Narcissist and he is dead but the emotional abuse I am still in counseling to find my authentic self. ❤ your hair! I’m think I gonna try that.

[spiderfart]

Our best traits work wonders for authentic people. But for the narc it's just supply because that's all they see it as. I don't think you have to make yourself less complex or less thoughtful, just be aware of how they could use it as a tool and pay attention to people's behavior patterns.

[SerenitywithLawna-Merry]

While listening to this, I had a thought pop into my head. Yourself being a psychologist and myself having a career in social work for over 12 years at this point... just as an example, if we were other people, we might actually think our education, degrees and experience in psychology makes us immune. WE believe WE are immune, became we ourselves believe we have all the knowledge and facts to protect ourselves. I know that in my 1st marriage, I definitely thought I had people allll the way figured out when really I was doing all of the things in an opposites way than I would guide others to do. Absolute insanity, but I think it also goes hand in hand about the fact that people like you and I often have very personal ways for getting into the line of work like this. One of my professors used to say 'No one in this room is "normal". ""Normal" people usually run the opposite way from people with problems where as we run towards the person and want to solve whatever it is thats wrong"... so if we are not very aware of our shortcomings.... we'll forget all our education and end up in situations just like you and I did.

I hadn't really thought of that before in a really in-depth way. and hey, Kerry, I appreciate your autistic traits and I am much the same in my expectations about other people and their integrity or honesty. That is my baseline though, and it never changes so I have learned to quiz myself in order to be more cautious - it sounds like you do the same. It's nice to know someone who knows what that is like even though I wouldn't wish it on someone.

This comment got out of hand in length - if you made it this far then, thank you. This was an amazing session once again!

[GeraldaZainalvand]

I appreciate your openness, sharing your own experience which is powerful. I really like your videos and have learned so much. I am still with my husband who is a narcissist but now I understand a lot of things for what they really are, and feel empowered to make decisions and think of myself more and hopefully soon I may break free from the relationship. I may be still stuck in the trauma bond.

[lil--mo]

Great work on this! Keep it up! Thank you!