Pray tell, who leads this inquisition? - A Greentext Story

Pray tell, who leads this inquisition?
Tis I my Lor-
Not henceforth

[geldundkokaine]

"his adoration for the illustrations and fictions of the Orient is immense my lord"
"He must be wise and traveled to have such extensive knowledge of their land and language"
"Nay my lord, he knows nothing of their speech nor written script and we have found no credible source of him traveling beyond the province"

[geldundkokaine]

"he hoards many crowsbows my Lord"
"Then he must be a man of great experience in battle"
"Nay, it appears he uses them for not but to strike wooden targets and to send sketches of to those other hermits of his sort"

[jacobsimpson]

Go now henceforce and lay thy hands upon grass

[TheSecondFinest]

To be fair, that's pretty much how monks in monasteries lived.
So... maybe it's nothing new.

[DashingSteel]

Fear the hermit that dines on tenders of chickens, adorned with honeyed mustard for he has nothing to lose.

[iamagreatape]

i love that this is a medieval version of "chief, this guy has no social media"

[thatverseguy]

Certainly a fine specimen of his time.

[TheGlitchyFox]

This is a bit someone should do in public with their friends.

[Dandyman]

*Imagine being so lazy you're labeled as dangerous*

[daniel-zhnjyny]

I was watching Criminal Minds: "Our suspect is in his early to late 20s, keeps to himself, few or no friends, has a job that involves little contact with society".
I was thinking:"They're looking for me !"

[OneBiasedOpinion]

It pleases me deeply to see someone actually using older forms of English in a proper way, instead of assuming adding “thee” and “thy” every other word and putting “eth” at the end of the rest is all there is to it.

[Detrebio]

So that's why the Inquisition was so firmly against magic practices. They had a wizard problem, casualties must have been massive for the Church

[thestudentofficial]

I love that the first text is a Sonic movie reference and the second one is the "chief, this guy has no social media" greentext

[geg]

"Lay thy eyes upon me, henceforth i'm the one commanding this ship now."

[polyacov_yury]

Judging by the first three lines, I thought this would be about the first Robotnik's appearance in the first Sonic movie.
>Pray tell, who leads this inquisition?
>Tis I my Lor-
>Not henceforth
>Na..
>Tis I now.
>..me is major Ben...
>I lead this.

[raslipmugfrud]

There are some 4chan greentexts that belong in the Western lit canon

[mr.cauliflower]

>My sire! The man we were pursuing! *pant* *pant*
>He seems to be a chaste and humble man, I believe we should leave him alone.
>He onanizes himself many times a day.
*crusade ensues*

[panzfaust]

Writer is so much better than what disney marvel churn out nowadays.

[imper]

Being a non native English speaker, it's both pleasant and a nightmare for this kind of English to be used in movies. Pleasant because it gives the feel of the era the movie is set in. A nightmare because I cannot understand half of the words.

[DJliohazord]

*remembers back in Victorian times people would tell others to stop reading books because they would lose their minds to uncontrollable fantasies about the characters in the books*