How to Decide What to Do With Your Life

In which we answer the popular question, "What should I do with my life?" Along the way, we bust some dangerous adulthood myths and discuss choosing career paths, joy, dreams, time travel, and the meaning of life and stuff.

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Created and Hosted by:
Emma Mills & T. Michael (Mike) Martin
Emma and Mike are also Young Adult novelists!
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Written and Directed by:
T. Michael Martin

Edited by:
Nathan Talbott

Executive Producers:
Hank & John Green

[thisexists]

I am still pretty busted up over the fact that I couldn't monetize my childhood dream of becoming a shark.

[galina]

I'm a senior, time is running out, have to decide on a major, don't know what I'm good at, facing an identity crisis, completely and utterly undecided! Anyone else been there? How did you end up choosing a major?

[holesinmybrain]

Well, this was a timely video... I mean, it helped calm my nerves for six and a half minutes, but I'm going to resume freaking out about not knowing what to do with my life now. 
But really, great video guys :)

[PlethoraShae]

I so needed this. I've always been known as the focused person who knew what she wanted and lately that did a complete 180 when I realized I don't enjoy what I do anymore. Now I need to get my but into gear fast so I don't stay undecided forever!

[SMFortissimo]

Also, your college major doesn't define you. I spent a good deal of college (and high school come to think of it) defining myself by what I studied, like your college major was a window into your soul or something. I distracted me from the very real question of "So, what are you going to do with that once you graduate?"

Take a good long look at your strengths (and no I don't mean that Strengths Finder test however much I enjoyed taking it). I mean your real strengths. Make a list of the things you're good at. That's where I like to start. They can be things that logically lead into a career, or not, just write down a lot of them. Sooner or later you'll notice a pattern.

Find that one friend. You know the one I mean, the one who knows you incredibly well and is brutally honest with you. It might annoy you otherwise, but this is the question your friendship with them was made for. Have a nice long talk with them about it.

[brittanyalways]

Thank you so much for busting myth #2. I think millennials especially have this idea that our money must come from something super creative and passionate that we LOVE. In reality, that's super rare. Sometimes there are jobs you are good at but not passionate about, and that's perfectly okay as long as you know how to work those other values into the rest of your life. It doesn't ALL have to focus on the career.

[VictoriaLautner]

“you won’t do one thing with your life. you’ll do many things with your life.” that made me feel so much better. i’m 22 and ive got no clue what i wanna do and i’m scared to do anything because i’m not sure if i’ll wanna do it forever. it’s nice to remember i’ll do more than just one thing.

[jennifergibson]

"That, my friends, means you're an adult." That would be a great catchphrase.

[louloureads]

I genuinely believe that if there's something you're really meant to do, you'll get there eventually, and the twists and turns in the journey enrich your life as well as contributing to the end destination. E.g. When I was little, I wanted to be Alexander Fleming when I grew up, which gradually worked its way into the more plausible goal "biological or biochemical research". However, my dad, though lovely, doesn't believe that women should have jobs outside the home or, at the most, the caring professions, so I let him convince me to become a nurse instead. Whilst doing my nursing training, I met some of my favourite people, moved to a city I really love, and grew hugely as a person. For example I'm extremely socially awkward, and my training taught me lots about how to interpret and react to social cues that I probably would never have picked up unless I was being formally taught it.

I'm still working as a nurse at the moment--it's paying for my PhD, which is the first step towards a career in healthcare research. I love my PhD, but I'm also a good nurse. Those skills will serve me well throughout the rest of my life--for example, I've developed skills in managing staff and dealing with complex, difficult situations that would have taken me years otherwise--both inside and outside my career. Nursing would never have been my first choice, but I got here and now I'm glad.

I also totally agree about your career not having to be your passion--I have a book blog under a pseudonym, because I am passionate about books and reading. That provides no income, but I can still pursue it for pleasure, and it does give me a lot of joy.

(This doesn't mean people should necessarily let their parents force them into jobs based on outdated beliefs about gender, it just means that there's always something else round the corner that you can't see coming).

[athenakym]

As an anxiety ridden senior in college, this helped me feel better about making decisions about my future. Thanks guys!

[chiquitapaulita]

great advice yet again, I feel I may need it again soon... (I have set my hopes on an academic career, but it's very very competitive, and I may need a back up plan)
Last year Hank Green did a talk at XOXO festival in which he gave some great advice. He basically said you don't owe your past self anything, you don't need to fulfill the dreams you once had. At the time, I had started my masters degree in communication, and it had nothing to do with my degree in Chinese. I felt almost obligated to keep up my Chinese because "it would be a shame" to lose it (everyone else was telling me this too), even though I knew the chance I would find a job that allowed me to use my Chinese and at the same time not make me completely miserable was very very slim. It really took the pressure off when I realized what I was trying to do was just unnecessary. I still practice my Chinese sometimes, but I now really do it for myself :)

[curiouslifewithbri]

I cried while watching this video.

I just turned twenty, am working at a job I never thought I could do, and am living at home again because traditional college didn't agree with me. I have been beating my mental self to "decide what I'm doing for the rest of my life" and whether or not I will be able to pursue my passions or if I have to continue in the field that my parents and others around me think I should. 

Thank you for reminding me that there are so many roads ahead of me and so much time to traverse them. Much love!

[SMFortissimo]

I think it's always good to realize it is never too late to change your mind. Lots of good meaning friends made it seem to me like I had to choose a major as a freshman, get that degree in 4 years, and never look back. But the truth is, the plenty of people change majors and career paths all the time. You can even transfer colleges if you find out the program you're interested in isn't offered at your current one(or isn't that great). That's what I did.

And it is possible to go back to school. Some might say it's impossible when you get married or have kids, but there are people defying that statement as I type this.

Sorry, I am very passionate about this. It is never too late to change your mind. You're never too old to learn something new. There are so many experiences out there for you. You are never stuck.

[Boycicle]

I'm fifteen and I was doing an art assignment with my friend yesterday and we were both commenting on the fact that we don't know what we want to do nor how to decide. This timing could not have been more perfect. Thank you!

[GodRoxMySox]

I have two college degrees ... and after a year out of graduating and not quite halfway through grad school, I've decided there isn't just one thing I want to do. There are a lot of smaller things I want to accomplish that require the skills and knowledge I've gained in school and through volunteering, internships, etc. Just do what you really enjoy, and some of the stuff you don't love so much, and it will always pay off eventually. Though probably not in the way you expect it to. :)

[konthewondercow]

That was honestly really good advice! It's important to think about all aspects of life that you value and look for an overlap when it comes to a job/career/whatever you're going to do with your life. Even if you wanted to be a stay at home mom or a volunteer firefighter which aren't typical "careers" it can be rewarding and exactly what you want to do with yourself. It all depends on your individual wants and needs.

I decided what I wanted to do through a mix of passion, pressure, and realism. When I was little I wanted to be an aerospace engineer because my dad kinda planted it in my head and I thought it was cool. Then as I got older I wanted to be in business. I took an accounting class in highschool and loved it. So I started college with an accounting degree. Over time I lost interest and found that economics and finance were much more interesting to me. Now I'm getting a finance degree with a minor in economics. But that isn't even where my plan ends! My dream is to have my own restaurant and to run the finances of it. And who knows if that will even come to be in the next 5-10 years. Plans change. Just gotta go with the flow and check in with yourself sometimes.

[brittany]

Wonderful video! I have a request for a future video, if I may. Could you do one on voting? Tell us where we should go, what do we do when we get there, what we need to have on us, what kind of things we'll be voting on, how should we prepare, and stuff like that. It would also help if you could give us some tips on how to decide what to vote on. For instance, what should we keep in mind while looking at presidential candidates?

[kujmous]

My first published poem.

One

He stood at the foot of her grave.
Motionless, consumed in thought.
Only one single tear crawled
From the depths of his sadness,
But the impact as it fell from his face
Shook his world to pieces.

[emmar]

no joke I have been struggling the past week with inner conflict of my purpose in life. And I really think that me stumbling on this video was planned. I thought I wanted to be an Accountant/Auditor (I know it sounds boring) but now I am considering majoring in some business field and minoring in a missions or religious field and going to third world countries to help people. I have decided recently not to choose a career path based on what makes the most money, but to choose one that I can help other people and be happy everyday. Thank you for making this video! It is helping me with my thought process

[velociraptorfeathers]

I think another really important consideration you should take into account is what things are feasible as self-taught hobbies and what things need to be done in a more formal environment. For an example, in high school I was torn between pursuing a music degree or an engineering/science degree. I finally came to the conclusion that music is something I can continue as a hobby, but science is something that requires a bit more formal dedication. Now, it could be the other way around- I could be in a symphony and read books about physics and evolutionary biology in my spare time- but that kind of thinking can help you to determine which path makes the most sense to you.