Autistic Burnout

Autistic burnout is a state of mental and physical exhaustion caused by living in a world not designed for neurodivergent people.

In this video I'm sharing crowdsources thoughts on how autistic burnout feels and how to avoid and recover from autistic burnout.

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A little bit about me:
Hi I'm Purple Ella and my family is an autism family with three out of five of us on the autistic spectrum. I also have a connective tissue disorder (hypermobile Ehlers-danlos syndrome). So life can be a challenge but also a lot of fun.

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[Torby]

In one year, I lost my job, home, found another home, and another job, lost my home, found a better job, found a home, wrecked my car, and got laid off. Took about 2 years to recover and still, I'd rather watch Netflix than do the kind of projects I used to enjoy.

[baguettegott]

I went into a burnout over a year ago. Usually I function pretty well, I study astrophysics at university and when people learn that I'm autistic they often put me into the "genius nerd" category. But as I got increasingly burnt out, I realized that I suddenly had trouble understanding things. It felt like I had become stupid when the lady at the doctor's office gave me instructions and I had to ask three times because I just couldn't process the information.

I was so distraught. I couldn't live on my own anymore, I barely got through my exams and didn't _understand_ things anymore. Loud sudden noises now made me cry. I had to take an ongoing break from university. I could barely speak anymore in group settings.

And I feel like some people, who used to dismiss my autism as the "fun, harmless kind", are suddenly a lot less understanding of it now that I exhibit behaviours like this. It really hurts, because I'm not the genius they thought I was. I can't be that. Trying to has almost destroyed me.

People give you a pass for being a weirdo if they think you're hyperintelligent. But I don't want to try to "make up for" my neurodivergency like that anymore. I just want to be myself and be happy. I don't need to be a genius for that to be okay.

[krissyk]

I don't know whether I have autism but I have anxiety and definitely understand burnout. I tried to work fulltime but quickly realised I just wasn't capable of that. I was so exhausted and stressed. Now I only work 3 days a week. People at work kept asking why I only want to work part time and what do i do on my days off! I don't want to explain that I spend most of my days off resting and recovering from my 3 days of work so I don't have a breakdown ! They just wouldnt understand 😝

[NotAyFox]

Since I learned about my autism, I'm now trying to reduce the things in my life that may lead to burnout, like allowing myself to rest when I feel mentally tired, being mindful of sensory inputs that I would otherwise try to ignore and reducing stress from social encounters by lowering my expectations both for myself and others. Implementing all that takes time and practice and with a full time job there are stressful things that are simply unavoidable. But reducing stress from other sources makes it less likely that the work will cause a kind of burnout that might incapacitate me for weeks or months (which has happened before).

[Tchernobog]

suffered from this for two decades. surrounded by abusive gas lighters who would put all of it on me and say I was bad. I have only learnt now that a burnout exists from this video..

[maironaulendil]

I had a burn out at 16, I forced myself to finish high school, which was a nightmare. Nowadays I feel constantly on edge and have no mental endurance, it feels like my autism has amplified, the burnout was 3 years ago, and I see no real perspective for me. Meditation and spirituality bring some relief, but still everything overloads me, everything is irritating, my executive functioning is constantly confused. I cannot focus, I cannot enjoy my hobbies as they're too irritating. When I structure my day and accomplish something for my own self, I get an internal feeling of unrest, and afterwards cannot sleep all night.
I need extreme calm and stability, and I constantly re-burn myself if I get thrown off balance and require several days to recover, I feel damaged beyond repair and like I can never be really functional in society, but I don't want to sell myself to a societally endorsed zombie routine even if I could, because I know this would just really kill me - and I fear that any kind of work or college would be going to do that to me, even if I wanted to - it seems like I have a PTSD like reaction to the school system, and project it on these things. I'd need a lot of accommodations - especially nothing that is more than 10h a week. I seriously feel too weak to live. It seems like there's no future perspective. I also have Complex PTSD due to family abuse and this makes things even more irritating and triggering and hopeless, as I depend on my abusive family. I'll probably get on disability benefits sooner or later. I might start breeding cats or some nonsense like that, I cannot otherwise work. I am so young, and yet I feel robbed of my own self and life. I am supposedly gifted, but I cannot even think clearly anymore.

[theoldaccountthatiusedtous]

Autistic burnout really resonates with me... even though I don't have autism. As a teen, I believed that my awkwardness meant I didn't deserve to belong, so I spent most of my energy trying to "fix" myself. I found school easy and barely had to study... until school became harder too. At the end of my last year of university, I had a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, wanted to sleep all the time, possibly had a depressive episode, and believed the things my depressed, low self-esteem mind told me. Looking back now, having done a lot of healing, it was really awful back then. At the time it's like my brain was protecting me from knowing how bad it was.

[brendanb]

My burnout isn't exactly the same as others, but I do feel symptoms of it. It's that feeling of being overwhelmed and numb to too many stressors at once that you just...shut down and don't want to deal with anything. I haven't experienced any meltdowns but I have felt the urge to cry sometimes from the weight I feel myself carrying.

[jacks]

Thank you for this. It's the 1st time I've heard the term "chronic burnout", which I believe I've been struggling with for over 14yrs now. It's been made worse by not being able to get a diagnosis. Hearing that term has made these last, horrible years make perfect sense.

[eileenfuentes]

One of the hardest things about this is living in a world with people that don't understand because all of the things that we have a hard time with are easy for them. Especially when it's your own spouse. 😔

Me: I am so exhausted, I have been going Non-Stop and I feel like I just crashed into a wall.

Husband: well let's go to that barbecue, it'll make you feel better just to get out and socialize.

😳😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

[pink]

Learning to say "No." Is so so important. I needed to hear that as a helpful reminder, thanks Ella!

[ShadowNTheWillow]

As a female disabled vet (recently diagnosed at 30 as autistic), the diagnosis helped explain a lot. It helps me identify a bit more what’s going on. One time I found myself so mentally exhausted I just collapsed on the floor. Like I literally lost the will to walk and my muscles aches and I felt weak everywhere. I don’t like talking out loud and my kids are asking me if I’m okay. I have patience for them thank God. They’re patient and know what I’m going through. My daughter sat next to me and hugged me saying “it’ll be okay”. I felt numb but calm.

[hellomynameisrio]

Ah!! This "adrenaline" state is why I was previously Dx'd as bipolar! Thank you for sharing!!

[apc]

Soooo, this is happening to me now. I suffered from episodes I put down to mental illness. Tuns out they are "meltdowns". I was taken aback when the guy assessing me pulled out an autism questionnaire, even more so when I got a high score and referred for testing. I've looked into autism, and I've hidden it so well, even I didn't realise I could possibly have it. I'm paying for that now. Big time.

[kstar]

Thanks for the information. Burnout is common in an autistic world.

[joriskemper]

The most disabling thing about burnout, is being pressured and scolded during the burnout for not being able to do anything, which makes some burnouts take years. It can result in losing your job, home or even worse.

When you don't have a safe space and time to retreat and recharge, the world only keeps adding fuel to the fire. And they keep pushing and pushing.

[markr]

Running on adrenaline will inevitably lead to “adrenal fatigue” which is well documented on the internet. It is cumulative as well so as soon as we all learn to fight adrenaline surges and try our hardest to not react then recovery can begin. I always think that if I’m over adrenalised I will pay for this in the future maybe next week or in 6 months time. Conversely if I consciously reject the adrenaline surge I will increase my life long recovery effort. Now it’s difficult and I used to worry I might seem boring staying calm, but boring is better than living in burnout. Great vid. Stay safe everyone ❤️

[oceanicsurvivor]

as i get older and listen to autistic people speak i realize i wasn’t severely depressed, i have severe autistic burnouts

[socraticproblem]

I’d like to see if the parallel universe where neurodivergent people are the status quo is a better or a worse world to live in.

[lpkelly]

It’s got me thinking. I know I need to decompress at the end of a long busy day, but I rarely get the chance to - with everyone else at home all day right now, when I get home there’s just too much to do and nobody else who’ll do it (they certainly won’t during the day). So often the first chance I have to relax is when I go to bed - and then I can’t sleep. And then I get a day like today (or, more usually, weekends) where I could be making use of the free time - but can’t be motivated to do so...