Dr. Marc Brackett: How to Increase Your Emotional Intelligence

In this episode, my guest is Dr. Marc Brackett, Ph.D., a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University, director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, and a world expert on what emotions are, how to interpret them, and how to work with emotions to yield a more impactful, meaningful and healthier life. We explore differences between introverts and extroverts, in-person and text-based emotional communication, and how emotional suppression impacts us.

We discuss emotional intelligence and describe tools to improve emotional regulation and communication in personal and professional relationships. We also explore the role of emotions in learning, resolving conflicts, and decision-making. We also discuss bullying in kids and adults, both in person and online. This episode provides a clear and novel framework for thinking about emotions and data-supported tools to improve emotion regulation, self-awareness, and empathic attunement.

*Thank you to our sponsors*

*Huberman Lab Social & Website*

*Dr. Marc Brackett*

*Timestamps*
00:00:00 Dr. Marc Brackett
00:02:02 Sponsors: BetterHelp, Eight Sleep & Eudēmonia
00:06:03 What is Emotional Intelligence?; Self & Others
00:11:18 Language & Emotion
00:18:52 Emojis; Anger vs. Disappointment; Behavior & Emotion
00:24:35 Sponsor: AG1
00:26:05 Parent/Teacher Support; Online Etiquette
00:31:24 Anonymity, Online Comments
00:35:46 Happiness vs. Contentment; Knowing Oneself
00:41:33 Introversion & Extroversion; Personality & Emotional Intelligence
00:51:28 Sponsor: LMNT
00:52:40 Texting & Relationships
01:00:37 Tool: Mood Meter, Energy & Pleasantness Scale
01:06:28 Emotion Suppression; Permission to Feel, Emotions Mentor
01:19:42 Discussing Feelings; Emotional Self-Awareness
01:25:00 Understanding Cause of Emotions, Stress, Envy
01:33:40 Framing Empathy, Compassionate Empathy
01:42:28 Asking Question; Tools: Reframing, Hot Air Balloon; Distancing
01:49:44 Stereotypes, “Emotional”
01:53:49 Emotions, Learning & Decision Making; Intention
02:02:43 Emotion App & Self-Awareness; Gratitude Practice
02:07:13 Bullying
02:18:06 Courage & Bullying; Emotion Education
02:25:33 Punishment; Uncle Marvin
02:31:59 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter

#HubermanLab #Science #EmotionalIntelligence

[hubermanlab]

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Thank you for your interest in science! -- Andrew

[madameaeriel]

“I was robbed of my emotional life as a child” so relatable.

[brittonyb]

I really appreciate Mark’s honesty and “human-ness.” He’s not trying to act like what one would imagine as an expert in the field of emotions. Super relatable and helps to give the general population “permission” to be who they are. Thanks Huberman and Mark.

[szumm]

Wow! Dr Marc is my new idol. Hearing about Marc’s feelings and his reaction to his colleagues ridiculous behaviour during a presentation knocked me out of my chair! I don’t think I ever heard a 50+ year old men be so vulnerable, intelligent and honest. I kept listening to this episode with my eyes wide open the whole time. Dr Marc is an inspiration

[socratias]

Please get Dr. K from HealthyGamerGG on your podcast! I feel like you guys could talk so much about loneliness, porn consumption, relationships, the overlap between psychology & neuroscience and so much more!!

[alexlavi]

I feel we are so so fortunate to have someone at the caliber of Andrew having these brilliant conversations with equally phenomenal people. Just listening Andrew's introduction today made me listen to the whole thing.

What a privilege to listen to these magnificent, bright, people sharing their impressive knowledge with us. What a privilege!!!
And it never stops to delight and (sometimes) surprise me how nice, kind, down to earth they, approachable, modest, sincere, transparent, open they are.
Thank you!

[margauxtbh]

Why is it that I didn't enjoy Science when I was in school, but ever since I discovered Dr. Andrew's channel, I've never been this captivated? Especially with this type of Science that introduces various protocols and zero-cost 'life-hacks' for personal growth.

[dinkkystumbler]

Dr Bracket I was so touched by your authenticity ! Thank you for sharing, it was very healing and inspiring for me to hear you speak. ❤Your hard work has not been in vain. Thank you you are a great human !❤

[bqpdobqpd]

I don’t know if people know this, but “emoji”is a Japanese🇯🇵 word, made up of two components : “e” is “絵” which means picture or paintings, and “moji” is “文字” which means text or characters, so it literally just says “picture characters”, which is exactly what they are.
And I found the topic interesting because I feel exactly the opposite for the Japanese culture as I think having emojis makes the text conversation more enriching and eloquent. Now, I do acknowledge that by using a single emoji to express feelings, we are cutting our effort to elaborate our emotions using words. But in Japan, no one expresses feelings, period. People never tell you what they think, and expect that you guess it right. And surprisingly, people do! (How😭😫🥺)So in a high context culture like this, tiny as it is, an emoji is a great hint to solve a mystery within our communications, and that’s probably why there are so many of them with the slightest difference in nuances.
Another important aspect is that Japanese being low tolerant in reading text in general, we use emojis to not exactly to omit elaboration with words but more for the benefit of readers. In Japan, most restaurants have menu’s with pictures and many even have replicas of dishes by the entrance. Another example is that it’s rare to see instructions or manuals explained without pictures or drawings by steps, and I couldn’t believe that only-text cook books exist in the US😅 Because we hate so much to read anything in plain text, and don’t want to be asked nor spoken to by others, visually rich communication style has developed so that we can keep on with our telepathic way of dealing with each other🛸👽🛸
As I’ve been in the US and have lived most of my life speaking in both languages, I still find it strange and sometimes scary how Japanese people get away communicating without really communicating…😢 I’ve got into fights with my own mom, telling me how I shouldn’t be so straightforward or that I “should read her mind”, but also had many occasions where people thanked me of how honest I was to tell them what I really thought, so things might shift…and hope these cute little 絵文字s could serve us all well❤😆🎉🎉

[tropicallymixed.]

For those of us raised by Baby Boomers, we really need to give them grace and consider how they were raised. We really expect the offspring of the generation that survived the Great Depression to have emotional intelligence? I give my mother grace because she had a mother who raised seven children on her own. How can I expect my mother to have emotional intelligence? Our parents were survivors and they believed their role was to feed us and put a roof over our heads.

[prmft]

Oh Marc! The story you told of the other professor showing the video of a child being bullied and saying "That was Marc before he got his black belt" touched me so deeply- and with the sadness I felt rage and identification.
When I was newly licensed, almost 30 years ago, I was in a training through an Institute in San Francisco in which I'd been chosen to present a case over a period of the entire first semester. It was a difficult case, and I'd chosen to present it because it was difficult for me to identify with my patient who was very much involved with paraphilia that involved scatological practices, and there were a couple of other clinicians who objected to my being chosen (by the leader) because of my inexperience. As the weeks progressed, there was much rolling of eyes and expressions wanting to "dump" me in favor of someone else presenting, and even though the psychoanalyst who was leading the group said that she had no objection with my presentation, she caved to the pressure of these couple of participants and prematurely ended my time presenting (which was supposed to last for the duration of the semester) and chose someone else to present (with less disturbing material). Years later, she approached me and asked if I had "survived" that horrible experience, so at least there was some acknowledgement that she hadn't handled the situation well at all and that it had been harmful to me. Fortunately, I was in analysis with a skilled supportive analyst and had the support of a couple of the other participants, but the ostracizing and contempt of these couple of more experienced clinicians was very hurtful and damaging to me at the beginning of my career.
Forgive the lengthy "comment" along with my other comments here, but I found this episode to be so stimulating and evocative that I wanted to share this.

[shirintobie-paul]

Thank you Dr. Huberman, team, sponsors and supporters ☀️

[Squish]

Dude listen to this during a run 😂 idk if it’s just me but Dr. Brackett sounds just like Edward Norton!

[nancyasaunders]

This guy is awesome. As a former kid, a parent of grown kids, and a former teacher, what he is doing is essential and long overdue.

[ShirleyMcalpine]

What a breakthrough, two emotionally authentic men in the same room at the same time!😮 All humanity will follow your your lead!🎉❤😂😊

[gracetallar]

I agree that just labelling the emotion is not sufficient to manage feelings and moods. However it is a first step. Knowing why shows you a trigger of your emotion and this is developing self-awareness.

[shirintobie-paul]

I forgot to thank DR. MARC BRACKETT☀️ This episode is a gift!

[ubaidgul]

Checklist while getting ready to watch Dr.huberman's podcast
-Pen
-Notebook
-Headphones
-Distraction free room.

[AlexDebeli]

Thank you, Andrew, for keeping us interested in science & life! 🙏

[sophiajmc]

I really enjoy episodes like this, where your guests explore aspects of human behavior that I wouldn’t usually notice in myself. And thanks for always asking the best questions to get the most valuable insights from them!