How Parents Influence Kids' Gender Roles

“In our home, I take on a lot of responsibilities that previous generations would have scoffed at,” says Whit Honea, a co-founder of Dads 4 Change. In a new episode of Home School, The Atlantic’s animated series about parenting, Honea explains why, in a culture where outdated gender stereotypes are “very much alive,” parents shouldn’t dictate gender roles to their children.

“By no means do I want to imply that it's wrong for kids to embrace things that they enjoy just because it falls on one [gender] or the other—just that it shouldn't be mandated by us,” Honea says.

[Housewarmin]

Oh no! "everybody loves glitter" that shit gets EVERYWHERE and stays for years in crevices you never knew existed.

[artsytakkani]

I remember when I was younger I used to believe that pink and purple were the only "girl colors"and every other color was a " Boy color". Even freaking McDonald's has pokemon as "boy toys"! Just Gimme my Pikachu dammit!

[vaishalirandheer]

I had a friend Medha. Her family bit different. Her parents always wanted a son but at first they got a daughter. But then they got a son too after a couple years. She is always treated to do stuff like cleaning, dusting and putting the dishes. She can't play, talk and even look at boys. She can only be friends with girls. She can't play sports, be soft spoken, play with dolls (but she should stop when she turns 8 cause now she is big) and she must get married as soon as she will turn 18 years. But her brother can do anything. Be friends with anyone, play sports, be Bully or whatever, be tough, shouldn't cry, not to play with girl stuff (dolls) and he doesn't need to do any chores.


Now this is my part


When I became friends with Medha, I didnt notice she was trying to change how I think. I used to play football/soccer with boys at school and used to watch DC movies. I also had many friends who were boys. She started to make me think like her. No boys no football, no blue and no marvel. But I noticed quick so I told her not to say such stuff to me. She didn't listen. She left me and went with the other girls and then became a Bully. All the girls were jealous I think Idk I just felt like that.

Before they only said mean stuff but then they started to push me and hit me. Well I had complained to our teacher so she said ignore them. But the next day Medha was gonna hit right on my eye so I blocked her hand and punched on her stomach. (I am brown 1 belt in karate) but because I hit her I got punished at school. This wasn't fair.



Now, some of u must be like, where were the boys they didn't help me?

Well, they used to bystand while I got bullied. Sometimes they would say stop but the girls would insult them. And they were pretty scared too.


I am not good in roasting people but I'll improve.

Idk why I comment the whole thing but I hope someone reads it...

[anupamaMall]

There are no "boy toys" or "girl toys". They are just toys.

[eliseweusthuis]

I’m pretty glad my boyfriend and I have pretty similar ideas about gender roles in the relationship. We both cook and clean (in fact most of our fights are about me not cleaning up my messes). I cook and shop more because I enjoy it, he does technical stuff more because enjoys that, and we take turns taking out the trash because we both hate it. :’)

[anrijupiter]

I hated when I go to McDonald’s and they asked me if I’m a girl or a boy because I never liked girls one tho I am one. I was so ashamed that I wasn’t fit in the gender stereotype. Now I’m super proud of myself for being tomboy.

[ezra]

“Everybody loves glitter” hell yeah! David Bowie would be proud! ✨✨✨

[literallykys]

i remember mcdonald’s did hot wheel cars for boys and hello kitty thing for the girls and i would always go for the cars, yes im a girl

[nessa]

I hate this romanticization of 50's America that so many people seem to have... newsflash- the 50's wasnt all sockhops and poodle skirts.

[finner_]

My parents mean well, but they’re stuck in old habits unfortunately. And since I’ve grown up in that atmosphere I’ve picked up the same habits. But I’m doing my best to break them. 👍🏻

[iTiMiNaKProductions]

I love this!! I think people underestimate the power they have to influence their children's idea of sex/gender and it ultimately leads to a possible lifetime of guilt-shaming nonsense!! Let kids be free and let them be happy :-)

[Nightwing]

If that story is true, that's ridiculous that they would have assigned toys for the gender of the kid.
Why don't they just straight up ask the kid if they want a coloring book or a yo-yo?

[ray-ygoy]

So boys and girls are different because of how they were taken care of at a young age. PARENTS CAN YA’LL MAKE US EQUAL?

[ctlverr]

I remember lying about my gender at mcdonalds to get the toys I liked better all the time.

[gigig]

Sweet baby Jesus, please send my way a man this mature and this evolved! In this age of rusty, bitter little sycophants running around everywhere, it's nice to be reminded that gems like this man still exist.

[haveaniceday]

I was babysitting a girl at a park and then a little boy came up too play with us; idk remember how the question came up but he said, “Can boy do girl stuff?” I of course said yes. And that it would be perfectly fine is he wanted to wear makeup and traditionally feminine clothing. He asked me to braid his hair after that, he was a sweet kid

[chimchimmochithecatlover]

In my family, mom always asks me and my sis to do household chores whereas my brother he gets to relax all day. If I argue about this my mom will say " now he will do dishes for u" I was so disappointed at her. My dad takes my side. And my brother says in name of equality u want to do anything. I think he has some other definition of quality.

[yesplease]

'what they see from me and from their mother as a society is important' yes! leading by example <3 love it

[rotemtamir]

I'm actually writing a paper about the connection between gender and expectations about romantic love, and as background information I had to write about some theories about love and gender. Most of my theories about gender and gender development are focused about the parents' influence on gender development. And it's really interesting to me, bc most of them say the same things with different words.

[stanconnorstan]

Who cares? It's 2018, almost 2019. I don't care what pronouns you use for me or what gender anyone labels themselves or others as. Call me "ew" for all I care. I'm going to wear and do whatever I want either way.