The ACTUAL process AFTER the body is no longer alive

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#endoflife #hospice #activelydying

[cass]

My brother died of colorectal cancer at the age of 44. A few days before his death, he developed a fistula near his rectum that was allowing what seemed to be his broken down insides exit his body. It seemed and smelled much different than bowel. And it just continued to come out. We would get him cleaned up and turn around to need to again. It’s a smell I’ll never forget. But I’m glad I was there to help my sister-in-law take care of him. He took care of me for years. He was pretty much grown when I came along. He helped raise me with my mom after my dad left us. He was the best big brother who went above and beyond the call of a brother.

[jugheadjones]

My mom died in hospice. Unfortunately we weren’t there when she died. We got there about 2 hours after her death. She was noticeably cooler. The hospice people did a wonderful job cleaning her up for us to see her. They even washed her hair. I know her soul had left and we were seeing just her lifeless body, but it was comforting to see her clean in a peaceful repose. I look forward to seeing her and Dad again.

[diannesidhu]

I was holding my parents in my arms as they took their last breath. I feel beyond honoured to have been there for them 💔

[davidpalmer]

I was with my mom (87 years old) when she died at home. It was extremely peaceful. Within seconds after exhaling her last breath, her skin started to cool (forehead and face). No messes thank God. The second she passed...It was just like in the movies... I had dozens of visions of her bathing me in the kitchen sink as a baby, dancing around the room with me as a toddler, baking Christmas cookies and putting out the little glass bottles of Coke for Santa... then I realized I was orphaned and I was now the elder of the family. Time seems to go by so fast. At least I was fortunate to reach the age of 60 when she passed.

[lauriewhite]

My Dad passed while I was asleep. But I woke up in the middle of the night for no reason. Being a spiritual person, I believe it was his soul telling me he had passed. I gave him his meds at 10pm, told him I loved him and went to bed. At 2:15am I woke up and went to check on him he had passed. He was still pretty warm. I spent some time with him telling him I loved am and what a great Dad he was. He still looked pink. I called the hospice nurse and his best friend, his next door neighbor. She was wonderful. Being a nurse and having been with my Mom when she passed I knew he was close to death. I feel so fortunate to have been with both my parents when they died

[michelecharlton]

I saw my Mom about an hour after she passed. She was at home, in her bed. She looked so at peace and seemed to have a smile on her face.

[russelldavis]

My husband had Cystic Fibrosis and had a lung transplant 22 years ago. I met him 6 months after his transplant. Two weeks ago he went into lung failure and it was decided that he'd receive palliative care. They removed the breathing tube. Within 6 minutes he was gone. He went peacefully. I was able to hold his hand and tell him I loved him, which helped me with closure/acceptance. By watching many of your videos, I knew that my husband had a good death. He appeared comfortable and he did not dye alone. Thank you for educating me on facing death in a positive way.

[chauntikleer]

After we euthanized my very old Lab, I noticed how relaxed she looked free of all the aches and pains.

[drmweavr]

The day before my mom died in the nursing home she told her doctor that she just had the best dream. Where she was going she was going to be okay and it was beautiful. She passed peacefully the following day, listening to a hospice nurse softly strumming hymns on her guitar. Mom so loved music, so this seemed such a perfect way to pass. I still have overwhelming feelings some days, but I just remember her words, "Im going to be ok." And that makes me smile.

[DougCeleste]

Thanks Julie for sharing all of this information which is NOT easy to hear. I was with my mom in the hospital when she was 81 and near death and unconscious. I was holding her hand and suddenly, her hand held my hand so tightly like a vise grip and then it suddenly relaxed and she had passed on. It was like she wanted to hold on to me for as long as she could before letting go and entering her Eternal Life. This happened on August 27, 2007 but it still seems like only yesterday. I LOVE you mom and MISS YOU every day! 😇

[skwarubwa]

Orthodox Jewish burial is the original green burial, being the standard practice for at least 1, 000 years. The body is buried within 24 hours after death in a plain coffin (unfinished wood or even cardboard) devoid of metal. The coffin placed in a grave without a concrete vault (law permitting) in direct contact with the soil. Depending on the type of soil, weather and climate, within a year, the body and the coffin have completely disintegrated.

[cashandramara]

My dad asked just a few weeks before he died that we donate his body to a medical school for science purposes. That to me was a beautiful, lasting gift to medical students that could continue to learn from him. Nurse Julie, please can you do such a video one day of what medical schools do with donated bodies? Thank you for your informative YouTube channel. I learn so much from you.

[bobbydevine]

My Mom just passed today, I was glad I watched 1 of your videos a year or so ago that explained the tell tale signs of someone near death, the past few days my Mom was showing several of the signs you talked about! She is no longer in pain & I'm happy about that part of it! Thank You <3

[Michele-qj]

My dad passed on his birthday. It was a blessing that all the family that were able, came to see him that day. After everyone left, i took a little break, I was his caregiver. There was a moment when I felt he was gone, and he was. He died peacefully. My Hospice team were amazing. We talked about everything. I would have lost my mind without them. Hospice nurses are earthly angels. On his last day, the music therapist came over to sing to him. He was able to mouth the words to The Old Rugged Cross. He passed that same evening, safe in the arms of Jesus.

[donaldhunt]

My Wife was on Hospice for 3 months and your videos help me know what to look for and not be surprise when things happen. Your are great at your job and our nurses were great.

[PiggyFuktoy]

Nurses are the true heroes in our society, doctors think they are, but nurses always prove themselves as being the best; Thank You nurses !!!

[PaulMarais-qy]

My husband died peacefully with me after diagnosed with 11 lesions in his brain. I was taking care of him 24/7. I most definitely went through a lot of trauma through this experience. You really assisted me through the process and help me to understand.
I want to thank you for sharing your experience and expertise.❤

[lostitem]

I only worked hospice care/dementia as a CNA for two years back in 2019-2021. I was hardly turned 18 when I was hired. I didn't do too many post mortum care procedures, but I'll never forget the three I have done, especially my first. It was unexpected. An elderly woman fighting a nasty parasitic infection in her legs. She was old, that's for sure, so I don't know if the infection is what killed her per se. She was fine just an hour prior, I assisted repositioning her in her bed so the nurse could change her dressings and got her comfortable. When dinner time came rolling around, and as we were bringing out trays to residents in their rooms, I caught her in the corner of my eye in the door frame.

I don't know how I knew. I did a double take. It was her eyes... Or the fact they were closed, how peacefully still and at rest she was. I stood there a moment, processing. She wasn't breathing, I noticed, as I saw no sign of her chest rising and falling. I quickly went to my nurse, and she came to check and properly confirm. Sure enough, she was gone.

I didn't know her well. She wasn't cogent enough to converse much. One of my tutor CNAs, bless her I miss her so much, got me and one of my high school friends, who recently got hired. She showed us the supplies we needed, took us in the room, closed the door, pulled the curtain, had everything ready, and put music on for us (it wasn't loud). I will never get the smell of death out of my mind, nor the sight of her eyelids becoming translucent and her skin yellowish and pale, and how stiff she became. We did what we needed. We stayed calm, and she was very proud for us holding it together, especially for our first time and considering how new we were.

The second woman, who I did get to know, we knew she was on her way out. She stopped eating over time and had given up, honestly. Hospice care is forever something I'm grateful for being able to do. Again, I was very composed. I don't know how or why I was/am able to shut my emotions off so easily like that, but I am grateful for it. Perhaps it's the fact I have learned to disassociate in traumatic moments over the course of my childhood, or ADHD, or simply because I knew I had to hold it together for their sake. I think it's a mix of it all.

The last man was a gentleman. A kind soul losing what was left of him due to dementia. His legs, and even his arms, contracted 24/7, and so he wore braces to assist the best we could for him. Even in his state, he'd always sing. He loved music, preformed in choir I believe. He was so incredibly stiff, I am not sure if it was simply rigor mortis, or the sheer amount of strain his muscles were under from constantly contracting. Despite that, I was glad he was finally at peace. He sometimes recognized me and would smile when I'd talk and be at eye level. A Devil Went Down to Georgia was a favorite song of his, I'd play it and other songs for him on his CD player while I preformed care.

One last thing, is I remember one resident, he was a high school coach in the past at the very high school I went to. The night he passed, we knew already he was going to any moment now, but that night when I said goodnight to him and got home, in my dreams I saw him. I am not spiritual, but I do think I knew he was going that night, and he was saying goodbye to me. The next morning, when I came in his bed was empty. I've had many dreams of my residents, usually them peacefully walking the halls and not facing any pain or displeasure over their age or disabilities. I hope they're all at peace like I envisioned.

(If anyone has read this far or even just skimmed, genuinely, thank you. I hope this doesn't get lost to obscurity in the comment section.)

[diannebrown]

My husband just passed in March. He had Parkinson's and related dementia. He didnt have tremors but he did have stiffening of the muscles in his arms and legs but specifically in his neck. It was like his head and neck were always leaning forward. It looked terribly uncomfortable but he said it didn't hurt. We had only been home from the hospital less than 2 hrs when they called that the nurse had gone in and found that he had passed. I know he waited for his daughter and I to not be there.

They asked if we wanted to come view the body and we said of course. I am so very glad we did. He had endured a difficult 9 days in hospital. But when we got there he looked so at peace. His neck muscles had relaxed and for the first time in several years he looked comfortable. I was glad to witness that. I was also glad, for him, that all his struggles were over. The physical detriments and the dementia were no longer ruining his life. His neuro had said one time it was a battle he couldn't win. But he was wrong, he did win the battle and left here totally at peace. ❤

[jptravels]

Just downloaded and listened to your book today...Thank you for all your candid information...My Loved One is 96 and is on HOSPICE..she has lived with us for almost 3 years now and we can see the end is going to be sooner than later...It is hard to express how much of a positive impact our hospice team has made in our lives..It is just my husband and I who do all the care...there has been no one else until hospice. We now feel we are part of a village of wonderful people who help us...Bless you all who do hospice care as a career :)