Many women are construction workers: it's a young person's job

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A certain class of woman is both highly attractive to (and potentially dangerous for) many men, namely: the woman without a life of her own. In this episode, I argue that these women are like construction workers: they're potentially one setback away from a forced retirement without a backup plan. As a result, they will typically be very pushy for commitment (and very contentious in separation).

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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #relationship #women

[psychacks]

A certain class of woman is both highly attractive to (and potentially dangerous for) many men, namely: the woman without a life of her own. In this episode, I argue that these women are like construction workers: they're potentially one setback away from a forced retirement without a backup plan. As a result, they will typically be very pushy for commitment (and very contentious in separation).


Book a paid consultation:


Social Media




Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community:

Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com

Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #relationship #women

[stephanie]

I was kind of like this at one point. What snapped me out of it was the man (eight years older) that I was dating writing me an email that said, "Life must be a blend of people and activities. I can be the man in your life, but not life itself."

[dkz]

Instructions unclear
Currently hiring female construction workers

[RShaun]

Man! You ain’t ever lied. The less of a life a person has, the more they expect you to fulfill for them and in them.

[rayrwyr]

Having a dedicated wife (devoted, loving, loyal, fit, feminine, submissive, dutiful, good mother) is most men's dream. Men would do anything to provide and protect such wives.

[dannwhitehead]

I was driving to my comfortable air conditioned office this morning, and drove past a job site where a new quick trip is being built. I live in Phoenix and it was already 83 out at 6:40 am when I passed by. I noticed how all the workers were men. I don’t think I could handle that job. It’s supposed to be about 110 today and many of them will stop working by 1pm because of the heat, but others will not and continue plugging away. I think of the women that say men are not needed and laugh.

[Aright]

This describes my wife and hits home hard. I’m the complete opposite, extremely busy and diversified interests and friends. She has no friends, they always leave her because they see her as extremely blessed: very beautiful, a homeowner and humble. So I’m her only friend and her husband.

[learncadadia]

7:38: "the women who demand the LEGAL commitment, are those who are least in the position to do so..."

[SteelSaint]

Impressively illustrates the idea that women see relationships the way men see jobs.

[FaintAura]

The women who have no career prospects, friends, etc are also typically the ones without the foresight to secure a man in their youth.

[DrBilly]

Summer after I graduated HS, I had visions of hanging out at the neighborhood pool; my dad had other plans and I ended up working in a welding/tool & die shop. Brutal work and even as a naive teenager, I could figure out that my body probably wouldn't take a lifetime of it (and even if it did, I'd be a wreck). I don't look down on anyone doing blue collar work, trades, manual labor, etc., but the lesson learned that summer have served me well.

[RobertJohnson-bjlk]

“Perspicacity”
the word of the day.
Thank you.

[brooklynjade]

A woman with her own life is much less likely/willing to make the relationship a priority.

[tiffanyapril]

Could you possibly make a video on this to help young women out who may be in this position? And how to create the healthy balance. What it takes from both parties etc. You have women watching your videos too just so you know!!

[darkxzero]

Great timing. This perfectly sums up the girl I’m seeing & why she’s been pushy for her “promotions.” Thanks again, doc

[SaltyDogPerformance]

The ones that are “independent” don’t want to let go of that and be “interdependent” with you. The ones that are not independent become totally “dependent” on you. I’ve seen it many times in my personal life.

[stevenvanderheide]

I’ve been a construction worker for 18 years and man I think you just scared me straight.

[zsuzsuspetals]

excellent analysis. I want to add about the housewife/divorce thing. There is a world of difference between the woman who had some education and a job and became a housewife vs the woman who got out of high school with zero ambition, zero skills and just got married. It's the latter that is going to be aggressive from start to finish as you said. Another nasty situation is the "housewife" of the wealthy man. She doesn't cook, clean or take care of kids. Staff does that. She's got nothing but time on her hands and she gets bored.
But the woman who is domestic, and enjoys taking care of her husband, children and her home is a woman to be treasured.

I know men don't care for the career woman where he is just one facet of her multi-faceted life. That is very understandable. Especially the career woman who is the breadwinner. Watch her turn into an 1800s man real quick the first fight they have when she reminds her husband that she pays the bills and it's her house.
But the other extreme of that type of woman is the woman you mentioned. The one who expects the man to be all things to her.
Men need to find the woman who is in the middle. She has some work and life skills. She has a life, hobbies and interests. But none of those things mean more to her than a man she wants to build a life with. It's not the tall order men think it is. I had a degree and work experience but I was happy to give it all up and support my husband's career. We struggled together. Now we're comfortable together.

[timsimmons]

I didn't realize this is what was happening, but about 5 years ago I was casually dating a average 41 year old single mom who was apartment living and barely making it. She constantly pushed for a serious commitment and I constantly denied. I was/am a successful man middle class with a house, vehicles, etc. I dodged a bullet.

[eric_linden]

It's fine if she is a construction worker as long as you know what you are getting into. Plan the rest of your life accordingly.