This is the ACTUAL key to happiness

We all just want to be "happy," but if you don't even know what happiness is how can you possibly hope to obtain it?

This question has been haunting me since I was four years old. The idea of spending most or all of my life chasing after something, only to finally capture it and realize it wasn't what I wanted terrifies me.

I sincerely believe that most of the world is focused on things that aren't worth focusing on. There's a foundational, fundamental component of life that must be present for anything else to matter and most people put it on the back burner or ignore it entirely.

After this episode, you'll know what it is and how to keep it in the forefront of your pursuit.

Get Practical tools for navigating life with depression and anxiety, delivered weekly.

Get my book: For When Everything is Burning

Connect with me on TikTok:

Hear the Podcast:

0:00 - The Single Factor Theory of Happiness
3:42 - Happiness Is Not the Absence of Unpleasant Emotions
7:15 - Why Abundance Doesn't Equal Happiness
11:38 - Your Inner World Shapes Your Experiences
16:20 - The Key to Lasting Happiness
20:12 - Maintaining Your Mental and Physical Health
24:35 - The Road to True Contentment

[marlene]

Finally, a mental health doctor who cares about helping the disturbed find answers. YOU'RE THE BEST!!!

[Beach_flower]

Wow. My husband and I are around your age and feel like we are struggling with just the relentlessness of being an adult and parent. This is one of the most helpful videos I’ve ever seen. The fact I can listen to someone of your caliber for free in my home is absolutely astounding. Thank you for taking the time to make these videos.

[sarahengland]

CBT is like this. The whole thing is based on the premise that the depressed person is wrong. But sometimes the depressed person isnt wrong and the bad things are real.

[minnax]

Life is full of pain, happiness is little moments that allow us to breathe in between. That’s how I see it, especially as I get older.

[ericblair]

One thing I know from living it..I'm 74 years old and there is a silent unreported epidemic of depression, anxiety,
loneliness, isolation and suicide in the elderly. Forced retirement has resulted in thoughts that life is meaningless
and you have no purpose. Your self worth plummets and boredom, monotony, and life becomes a never ending
loop of doing the same thing day after day, you become habituated rote, existing, not living.

[lornalouw]

I've probably seen 8 therapists in my lifetime of 55 years... And didn't resonate with most of them. Your explanation is so clear and so simple. Thank you. I've saved it and will listen to it again.

[raysapaw]

I don't desire happiness, just purpose & relief for pain. Happiness is a desire of the young.

[sharonselvidge]

I am listening to this on September 9th 2024. Everything you say is so heartfelt I get tears in my eyes. Thank you for putting yourself out there for all of us. I really needed to hear this today. I am struggling with finding who I really am and this is a good start for me. God bless you Dr. Scott❤

[skival]

I don't think anyone has ever explained exactly how i feel about life and my mental health until I found Scott.

[lauram.]

There's always this talk about happiness. I don't even think people are searching for that. I belive what we are searching for is peace. Happiness is superficial and temporary but peace is more consistent. Peace is not only about feeling good. It's about finding freedom in imperfection and misery. It's about the freedom of expression of the self. It's about allowing to be what is without the constant fight. It's about letting go.

[Saganna-jrej]

I've had depressive bouts all my life with no real understanding of what was happening. Tried lots of external changes and zombified myself with Prozac for a bit. Your direct approach coming from a place of personal knowledge has helped me more in the last month than anything in the previous 67 years. Thank you so much. ❤

[ItsMe-ohdq]

Both of my two brothers have committed suicide. I am grateful I have found your site but also self aware enough (I think) to know that it always has to come back to me…… and I am just sooo tired of the fight. I fought the good fight for 63 years but since Covid….I am so shut down I don’t even want to try anymore. Maybe, just maybe something here will help as in my province of NS, Canada our health care system is nonexistent. 🇨🇦 Thank you for this work you are doing. You never know who’s life this may reach and save.

[christeljulia]

Possibly the most concise and valuable psychology resource on Youtube. Good stuff. Very helpful-- thank you!

[a.nonymous]

HOWEVER, some people have had a HUGE preponderance of experiences in life that ANYone would consider negative and bad feeling. It's hard to overcome that.

[efremlosli]

Hey brother. Just found you channel today. I’ve noticed that you sometimes say “I know this sounds a little cheesy” and other stuff like that, and I know to some degree that comes from a place of insecurity but I just want you to know we can feel the love emanating from your words so even if it is “a little cheesy” we can feel the care and love in your words. Stay strong man and keep speaking because you’re helping people change their lives for the better. ❤

[thecatat]

"You *are* putting good stuff out there" I cant afford therapy, but watching your videos is helping me tremendously, especially this episode. The meaning of my name means "to be happy" and I always joked with people and say that I live up to my name ... then something changed and that feeling disappeared. I am struggeling to get it back, because I miss it and this video is just what I needed to hear again. Thank you!

[julienelson]

After years of therapy (yet still marginally to significantly depressed, depending on where I am in my depression cycle), I am consistently getting more help from your straightforward podcasts than from anyone else. I follow you religiously, and can always find new insights and actions each time. I can’t thank you enough. ❤

[thecove]

Thank you, Dr. Eilers.

I'm 22. I've been having suicidal thoughts since 15. There have been so many days when I feel like I don't want to exist. It's torture to feel this way when my life is so privileged. I keep wishing I've never been born. I wish I can give this youth and health to someone else who can enjoy life.

I feel so relieved to have found you and your content. I'm in a depressive episode right now. It has lasted for about 2 weeks. I couldn't fight feeling so sad anymore so I wrote your teachings down. It helped cleared my mind a lot. This is the first time I heard someone explaining happiness in a way that makes sense to me. I love your "glitchy translator" metaphor. Thank you!

I hope your video helps other people too. I cannot imagine how painful it is for another person to feel how I feel.

[MW-greatteacher]

I just strive to be "content".. usually it involves getting quiet, paying attention to my thoughts and thinking grateful thoughts. Being too plugged into the "matrix" makes me miserable.

[diacrawford]

In all my years of trauma therapy I wish someone could have explained this to me as easily as you did in this podcast. My translator needs to be fired for years of translating only doom. Wow! So powerful. Thank you for all your videos but especially because they are free and genuine. I have been on disability 8 years and noone has offered to help me for free. May God bless you!