We Failed Our Friend...

We Failed Our Friend...

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[MichelleMcphine]

I have a girlfriend who i love dearly. I decided to help her by bringing her home for a few days...she just needed a place to rest to clear her head those were her words. This went on for months. She would leave and then call needing to clear her head so she could accomplish what she needed to do..drivers license, job, home. Each time she came back nothing she said she was going to do was done. Each time she stayed she was becoming more dependent on my husband and myself to help her. Driving her everywhere, feeding her, giving her a place to stay...the vibe in my home was getting strange. Over time it became too much..she was taking over my home, rearranging things, walking around with barley any clothes on, playing music all day very loud even if I was trying to rest i felt she was trying to become the women of the house...my husband had a wife he didnt need 2. He told me I want one women in my home and thats you..I realized this isnt healthy for my marriage. My husband shouldn't have to financially and emotionally support another woman. It was becoming a problem she was getting nothing accomplished each time she left after clearing her head. She would come back with nothing accomplished had the same clear my head story but wouldn't take any advice we had to offer her to get her out of her situation. We were doing all the work while she became more and more comfortable taking over my home. I finally realized I had to do something about it. Each time she stayed my anxiety was getting worse and everytime she left i was emotionally drained for days sometimes a couple weeks. It got to a point I had to basically drop her off at a hotel and just drive away. It was hard I felt guilty as hell. I then found out she had used my debit card to pay for a room in New Orleans she had lied to me about making me think she had points for a 2 day free stay. They just needed my card in case damage was done to the room..that was not true. I was charged for the room in full..She had the card number from that trip without my knowledge. After that when I dropped her off at a hotel because i just was emotionally not handling her presence in my home she tried using my card for another room and had also tried doing online shopping with in while in my home the night before. All that anxiety I was feeling when she was staying with us was my gut telling me something is very off. It takes two...we were doing all the helping while she wasn't helping herself at all other than helping herself to our money, my home and my husband's kindness...I was so sad to find all this out. She still calls me from different numbers almost everyday. I wont answer i just cant get sucked back in. The calls are almost harassment its went on for 3 months almost everyday. I stilll ignore them. I have to remind myself she lied, she stole, she took advantage of my love and kindness most importantly it was straining my marriage my husband is a good man he never complained but I saw the stress in his eyes over her presence in our home. It had to end and I had to do it. I was pissed at her for putting me in this position of having to be the bad guy and basically dumping her off at a hotel. This used to be a very close friend and it hurt to do this to her but i felt i had no choice..she has to figure it out I didnt make her mess she did. This is not my responsibility to fix her life it is hers. She made bad choices that got her in this situation not me. She somehow made me feel like it was my responsibility for 6 months she was very good at getting me to feel bad for her I would come to her rescue everytime she called it was mentally making me ill. I love her but I realized I cant save her from herself. People will put you in awful positions and its our job to recognize when we are being manipulated, lied to, and taken advantage of.

[k.g.]

Love has to go two ways.
So many miss this.

[bonnieoles]

This was too short to understand what he's going through.

[TheNinnyfee]

When you love someone that much you still feel like you're failing. ❤ But thank you, it's so hard to accept that there's a third dark party in between.

[elainedress]

Can we talk about evil narcissists and how to heal after leaving the relationship... The trials and tribulations....

[snowwhite]

Just stop. My friend was being catfish for months, almost 2 years. He would not listen to anything I mentioned, red flags, etc. He literally got so extreme, I hung up on him. He was sacrificing a 25+ year friendship for an unknown person, likely a Nigerian catfish ring. Just let your guilt go.

[margreetdoodeman]

Is there a difference between catfish and being scammed?

[lolawhiteeagle]

I watch these videos called catfish on YouTube. Their are countless stories on their.

[divinechaos]

After 25 years married. Waiting for my husband to participate in *our relationship. With me. Hmm. Ill let you know when 😅 um starts to. Um ever care about me or what I hoped for it to be "*Our Just my own hopeful stupid naive, roae colored glasses. Wanting to believe and trying everything possible. But ego and a fake persona is a very hard coat 2 break. Or work with with when not only is the other not willing. In fact quite the opposite. And has no problem 😅voicing ThAt 😰😥