I'm part of the toxic natural hair community.

I've been doing a lot of self-reflection in my involuntary hiatus. I've been thinking about all 'the natural hair community is toxic', 'the natural hair movement is over' and other such videos. I figured I'd check in and see where I land among all those critiques while keeping in mind that I'm always trying to improve.
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**PRODUCTS USED**
🌿💁🏿‍♀️✨*PRE-POO*
*FRESH ALOE LEAF: …..the sto’ (farmers markets are your best bet imo)
☀️💁🏿‍♀️✨*HEAT*
*TURBI TWIST: Mine broke. Easily. On my teeny head. I don't recommend at this time.
💦💆🏿‍♀️💦*WASH*
✨🧖🏿‍♀️✨*CONDITIONING*
*FRESH ALOE LEAF: …..the sto’ (farmers markets are your best bet imo)
💨💁🏿‍♀️✨*BLOW OUT*
StarPuppy Podcast!:
The History of Fluffnugget (My Hair):
StarPuppy vs. Styling Series:
StarPuppy vs. Shrinkage Series:
StarPuppy vs. Natural Hair Growth:

[blndbat]

there's nothing wrong with wanting long hair, its just that fact that we think we're ugly without long hair, i think that's what us 4c girlies need to work on. we're beautiful both ways! it took me so long to get to that mindset and i still struggle sometimes

[ToyaF]

Another toxic trait is feeling like you need to straighten your hair for important events.

[PoagieBoi]

Straight up, having kids cured it for me. I don't want my girls growing up with a mother who has image issues. I actively looked over at my daughter watching me mess with my hair. I straightened up and said "Mama looks good today! And so do you, baby!" We giggled and left. For some people, you can't be your own reason. You gotta be better because you set an example.

[valencia]

I think a major toxic trait with 4c hair is the over manipulation to get defined curls.

[carenwhite]

I gave up. All this week I've been wearing my wash day plaits pinned up and that's it. My edges are hedges 🤷🏾‍♀️ I work in a prominent city in a prominent neighborhood but I can no longer be arsed to satisfy anyone's expectations. My hair is down to my boobs in all its 4c goodness. It's moisturized and healthy and that's good enough for me

[deviousangel]

I absolutely loved when you said "I no longer run around the hair aisle looking for a solution for my hair, because my hair isnt a problem".❤

[leighm]

I use to struggle with envy then I heard somewhere “don’t get jealous, get inspired”

[ashleyhester]

I think to be free from the standard of our hair needing to be “sleeked” or always having that “freshly done” is just leaving our hair how she is. Give her what she needs to grow and just leave her be regardless of how we think she should look and be. Ya know what I mean?

[PrincessPixieBell]

If chunky plats and not slicked down edges were normalized, It would make my life so much easier.

[ashleyhester]

I used to struggle with envy especially when I watched the other natural hair girlies grow their hair from TWA’s to waist length hair… but now im like “f it!” My hair gonne do whatever she want to do look how she wanna look and imma just be the supporter of it 😂

[tunzlunz]

Yes girl messy puff is my messy bun. It’s my “I couldn’t be bothered to do anything else to my hair, you’ll get what I give you” hairstyle.

It’s interesting…hearing you talk about the “toxicity”. It sounds normal actually. It sounds like normal things every race goes through. I think the difficulty we have in the natural community is we are under so much pressure to be the exemplary negro due to all the stigma natural hair already has.

[Proudmary]

Thank you for always being vulnerable. You are the only natural hair content I watch because I always felt gaslit by all the others. How to grow waist-length hair in a month? (don’t look at my genetics), 10 easy 4C hairstyles (brings out extensions, gel, blow dryer, ability to braid a heart shape), If you don’t like your natural hair, you hate yourself. (proceeds to style hair for 2 hours in a “natural state”). When I first shaved my head I felt gender dysphoria because I didn’t realize that most of the women who are championed for going bald on socials also wore full face makeup, dresses, and earrings and here I am in shorts and a t-shirt wondering why I feel like a little boy. I have been natural for 10 years and my hair is just getting to bra strap length but I try to remember it's about health, and it is yours, I am not in competition with anybody else and its okay to be mad about it sometimes.

[Arielle_C]

It's amazing how the typing chart has blk ppl so divided & in a chokehold. Look at how diverse our Earth is; do you really think there's only 12 patterns for 7billion ppl? That system was invented for Andre Walker's product line. It wasn't meant to be applied to the entire spectrum. There's arguments in the comment section of every natural hair video over this silly chart. I'm definitely a starpuppy fan. I do however look forward to the day this chart is left behind.

[GreenPantsAllDay]

I've felt this way before! I have decided to just let my hair loc. It seems to want to similarly shrink and tangle. I figure that my hair strands want to be in a loving embrace!

[vanessaanucha]

I have 4c hair too, the type I was always ashamed of having (possibly still to the day), and was called ugly even in my own black household.

I did the feared wash and go WITHOUT manipulation for the first time in years this week - it feels vulnerable but I have this strange sense of peace and confidence that I didn't expect. You've got this x

[sp_cecadette]

I too fantasize of leaving the house looking like Coolio .

The daily/weekly energy and maintenance feels equivalent to preparing to go to a prom or a wedding .

[edenlewis]

I’ve definitely had hair envy. Especially because my hair is 4c and I have seborrheic dermatitis which makes my hair weak and fall out around the edges. I tend to change my hairstyle a lot too and it hurts when you can tell people perceive and treat you different with different hairstyles. It really messes with your psyche as a young adult.

[Keasha]

This is the thing I've been natural for 39 years, big chopped in 1993, there was no community then, but I did come to realize that once I lost that relaxed mane I spent so much time and money growing, I had to face myself in the mirror, my black features, my black self, no distractions, no accepted terms of femininity, and I had to learn to embrace me and heal the toxcicity, yes it's just hair, but that doesn't mean it doesn't matter❤

[tayabillingsley]

I struggle with envy just because of the time commitment. I think about how long it takes me to do a protective style or do my hair, while also having to manage my grad school class load. And there's only one other person in my entire class that has to deal with the same thing. No one else has to budget extra time for hair and school work like I do

[Mellzya]

One toxic trait I've noticed amongst the natural hair community is when ppl dictate to other ppl on whether or not they "really" have 4c hair simply because they believe 4c hair is solely connected with being "dry & undefined" & will ARGUE others DOWN who say otherwise 😑 they really believe anyone who claims to have 4c hair but doesn't have dry hair that can't be defined are "really" 4a/4b & not 4c 😒 smh