Dating a WIDOW? #1 Thing They DON'T WANT YOU to KNOW!

Sevilla shares a VULNERABLE widow's secret of her own AND tells you what your beloved WIDOW(er) does NOT want you to know (or maybe not yet). If you've got a widow(er) who is WANTING or READY to move forward and you think it's with YOU, then DO NOT miss this one!!

Sevilla I. Love, LCSW Grief and Loss Specialist, a licensed clinical therapist with over 20 years of experience who brings her lifetime of metaphysical studies and intuitive abilities to the service of others through social media and online private guidance and discovery sessions. She is a widow who experienced a massive amount of loss and life transition by an early age. Sevilla specializes in utilizing profound spiritual insight along with her clinical expertise, leading others to their own personal enlightenment by finding the higher soul-purpose in grief and loss after major life altering events. She's guided hundreds of clients to a renewed sense of peace, passion and purpose again.

She's also on FACEBOOK @PermissionToLoveAgain (widows are invited to join the private FB group)

**** You can find her channel on YouTube sevillailove

She's also on FACEBOOK @PermissionToLoveAgain Widow/ers are invited to join the private group from the homepage.

MUSIC CREDITS:

Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0)

Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0)

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0)

[thelisaluc]

This is one of the best videos on widow-hood, I've ever heard. 35 yrs. Husband passed 6 yrs ago. I got in a relationship 2 1/2 yrs later. I felt i pushed him into me. We broke up after 4 yrs. Real disappointment. I wasn't ready. He didn't get me. I have so much love to give still, but I am also desiring for the love in return. He couldn't give it to me. I think I was blinded by my loss that I loved a man who never adored me and never deserved me.

[Pat]

I met & married a Widower. He cherished me from the very start of our relationship. It was different than my long term marriage that ended in divorce a year before I met my Widower. We fell deeply in love & are still there! Married almost 4 years now & he is the best thing that's ever happened to me! I love him back & treat him like a King. He is an expert at cherishing me & I have never doubted that he loves me & will be with me for life since we met. I pray we both live long & enjoy this beautiful marriage!

[jrwheeler]

God, this was so relatable. My husband only passed away a little under 7 months ago, so I'm not ready to start dating yet, but what you said about missing all of the little things they would do that would annoy the piss out of you when they were alive are EXACTLY the things that you miss when they are gone. For me, my husband used to CONSTANTLY leave his dirty laundry all over the place. I would get annoyed and would have to yell at him to take care of his damned clothes. He would especially leave his dirty clothes on the bathroom floor whenever he would take a shower and then I would go in and have to pick them up, which nearly drove me bonkers for 22 years. Now, I miss that SO much. I miss walking into the bathroom and seeing his clothes there. I miss how he would always forget to put the butter back in the fridge and I'd always have to do it for him. I miss him yelling to me from the bathroom because he needed toilet paper and there wasn't any left on the roll. I miss him going upstairs and then him texting me 2-3 minutes later asking me to fill up his water bottle, when he had literally just been in the kitchen. I miss his inner 12-year-old and his inappropriate jokes that I would always roll my eyes at. I miss EVERYTHING about him. :(

[fshafly]

I'm a recent widower, surfing around the web to get a better understanding of my intense grief and how I can transition to a new normal. Listening to you speak about the "little things" has me crying (again). Thanks for sharing your insights...

[kamara]

I really needed to hear this. I've been dating my widower for 5 months, and I know he at times struggles, but there are so many good moments, and I can tell when he looks at me, he loves me. There are times I think this is too good to be true, but for me, it's worth it, and I tell him that.

[keithwinnick]

This is absolutely the best video. I'm currently in a new relationship with a widow whose husband was ill for 10 year and passed away 2 years ago. When she looks at me it's with total adoration. I've never experienced that before and it's wonderful. I'm just living in the moment. She's such a blessing.

[Wookinpanub]

Great topic.
Lost my wife three months ago from cancer.
High school Sweet heart’s, married 33 years right out of school.
We worked super hard to make our own lives and actually bought our first place before we graduated.
We invested in children over the years and had a great marriage, one in a billion.
.You really explained to the detail how it feels to lose a soul mate.
Half of myself even among family.
The entire family is devastated but just as you described its even a deeper loss when its your life long partner.
I really hope I will find another special woman.
My wife told me numerous times that she wants me to remarry and love again.
At the time I didn’t want to hear it but now I really would love to have another woman in my life.
Im holding out for a good one.
I realize my chances at 53 are slim.

[vleeism]

I am recently widowed and I DO admire and cherish every little thing my new boyfriend does! I didn't realize that part of the reason could be because of the loss I suffered. But I still think he's amazing in every way ❤️

[CatServant]

I love your take on this and I’m experiencing it right now x2. I was widowed 17 months ago and finally found a terrific lady who is also a widow of 3 years. We’ve one had one date and we really hit it off; we’re coordinating a second date. We have so much in common apart from our widowed status and she gets me, having gone through the same trauma of a sudden loss of a spouse. I will take your advice to heart and appreciate every little thing she does.

[MagpieTear]

Thank you. I lost my wife of 25 years to cancer almost 4 years ago. Almost ready to give up hope, the modern dating scene (apps) is so screwed up and shallow that I am preparing myself to live the rest of my life solo. Then I stumble across this video. Yeah, the little things I miss. Our marriage was far from ideal, but we were both too stubborn to give up on one another. And I want that eyeroll I can feel behind me again when I'm being stupid. I miss the moments of "wtf" as she droned on about work. Maybe it's time to shift perspectives again and learn how to date all over again. Thank you so much.

[kathleendunbar]

Thank you, as a widow who is falling in love with a loving and caring man I shared this with him and hes truly grateful for this video.

[nicolebelleville]

This is me! Yes, there is hope of finding love after loosing your life partner. I am 63. I was married 36 years! I have found someone that loves me and make me feel happy and a live again! Yes, after loosing the love of your life, you do learn to appreciate the little things that make a person who they are. The one thing I would add. A widow appreciates how short life is and how every minute, especially with the one you love, is precious! Having a widow for a partner will keep your relationship centered in this fact. We don't sweat the little things. We know what matters in life, the ones we love and our friends. We have learned to says yes or ask because life doesn't always give you a second chance! We live in the moment and live that moment to the fullest! I am so glad to hear that you have found your special someone!

[Ian-om]

I'm a man in love with a widow in the UK and was crying by the end of this, everything now makes sense, I've never had so much intense love from a woman, thanks.

[darrenbuttery]

I have a good story for you. I was widowed over two years ago and it was very unexpected as she was only 49. She worked days and I worked an unusual shift (4 pm to 2:30 am mon-thurs). This was nice because we always had three day weekends to spend together. However, my body got used to that schedule so I would not be able to fall asleep until 4 am, even on the weekends. She would typically be asleep by 11 PM. Here was our weekend bedtime routine. We went to bed together at say 10:30. I would lie awake until I heard her snoring for at least ten straight minutes as she was a light sleeper. I would then ever so slowly ease out of bed and when I say slowly I mean it might take 5 minutes to be fully out of the bed. If I went too quickly, she would wake up and say "Where are you going?". Once out of bed, I would turn the door knob at a snails pace and slowly open the bedroom door (of which I kept the hinges well oiled). Then I could slowly close the door and go watch a movie or put a game into the playstation. Almost without fail, she would wake up within an hour and come storming out of the room, turn the TV off, cross her arms and say "I didn't get into a relationship to sleep alone. Let's go, we're going back to bed." I would have to follow her to bed and repeat that process all over again. At the time I hated it. I felt like she was treating me like a child. It was really annoying. After she passed, I found myself missing that ritual. I really really missed that and have often said that I would give anything to get to do that with her just one more time. It's funny the things you take for granted and the things you come to miss once your perspective on life becomes forever altered.

[rustyclam]

My gosh! I needed this SO bad, thank you! I knew my wife for 44 years, and we were married for 31. She was a widow with 3 young children, and I had never been married. We had a child of our own. She has been gone now 5. Years. I’m ready now.

[patriciap]

Thank you so much for your respectful and loving words. I am a widow a little over 1 year, I do feel ready to date again, partly thanks to my husband. Because he was dealing with a log term illness he was always coaching me to not be alone. “You are a wonderful women that need to be happy “ his words.
But listen today from you make me feel confident to really look for love. Appreciated!

[NorthernBell]

Great stream! I just came across your channel this morning.
I can totally relate to everything presented as well as many of the comments in response.
I wrote the below yesterday in response to a meme on another channel but didn't post it.
It wasn't about widows but regarded what both men and women can bring to the table in a relationship.
Some have a plate full while others come empty or open handed.

Talk about timing!

For consideration: Date a Widow


Date a widow?


I know …some may think out of ignorance too much “baggage” or whatever.
If so, don’t be so eager to paint all “Widows” with one broad brush stroke.
A defining acronym for WIDOW: With Integrity Develops Ongoing Wisdom.
Her mate has died as did her prior life with them.
She’s not looking for a replacement, to be pitied or viewed in need of rescue.
The acclimated/adjusted widow is quite alive, vibrant and experiencing life in singlism through new lenses in a new world.
She’s likely well balanced, confident, resilient and encompasses femininity, grace, grit, and gratitude combined with strength of character, zest for life and a compassionate yet determined will to thrive.
Intelligent, self-aware, discerning, humorous and a little scrappy, she gets things done.
She’ll not waste your time nor hers. She’s keenly aware of how short and precious life is and her contribution to it.
She’s an asset not a liability.
Although able and content on her own she may also be looking for someone of the same: Worthy to build with and co-author the next amazing adventurous chapters in life.
She has lived much many have not yet experienced, could hope to find or learned of or about. Some may have even taken such things for granted, given up or have become jaded.
Appreciation, value and respect along with a loving devotion are but a few things a widow could bring into your life.
She has lived and loved it already knowing the value of a good mate and relationship as well as the well-rounded wholesomeness with in it.

[drewschrep]

You absolutely nailed this. These are the same thoughts I have as a widower too. I was angry for a long time after God took my best friend and love of my life when I was only 50. Now I just feel grateful for the love I got to experience because I thought it would never happen to me. I would really like to meet a woman who could become my best friend again and maybe, God willing, another love of my life. But it's so hard to meet people when you changed from an extrovert to an introvert after December 2, 2019. I miss smiling and feeling happy every day. I used to be really good at it!

[sladebissell]

I’ve been in a relationship with a widow for 9 months now and there have been ups and downs. I’ve been there and supported her through them. Last week marked her Husbands 2 year death anniversary and it’s really been hard on her. She’s never done any kinda of grief counseling but realizes now that she needs to. She told me last week that she would like to take a step back from the relationship while going to counseling to make sure she was in it for the right reasons. It’s been hard on my end feeling helpless and just the unknown of it all. I told her I wasn’t going anywhere and I would support her through it because I loved her and her 5 kids. Just looking for some advice/words of encouragement through this tough awkward time

[michellem]

Thanks so much! I can watch your video again and again. I’m 2 month widow, you just rise my awareness