Vane - Of Matches and Rust (ft. Apollo Kepler) [Original Song]

I would set the world on fire if it meant I got to watch you burn.
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I am beyond happy with how this song came out omg!! I revisited this song back in March using a creative writing piece I wrote as kind of a basis for the lyrics. As I kept working on it, I realized that I needed Apollo to be featured on this song. And I am so, so happy that he was down to work with me!! He is one of my closest chums and I am so glad that I finally got to collaborate with him after all this time. He did such an amazing job on the vocals 😭. Jinx and Snoww did an amazing job with the art and Friend did such an amazing job with the MV!! It all came out so good and I’m so happy!!

This song is a bit of a sequel to Higabana Milk Tea; HMT and this song are about the same subject (reflecting on past abuse), but from two different perspectives. HMT is more from the adult perspective, while this song is more from the perspective of the inner child. I hope this song is as cathartic for others as it was for me to write.

Thank you all for your support, and I hope you enjoy the song!

P.S. There is a JUN version of the song (tuned by @YoppyVU ) that’s being released on streaming services along with this version, so keep an eye out for that!
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Song by Vane (you are here!)

Vocals by Apollo Kepler
@apollokepler

Art by Jinx and Snoww

MV by friend
@friendxp
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[vanelily]

Streaming links!!

Please remember to check out Apollo's channel!! He did such an amazing job on the vocals and i am so happy with the final result!! 😭

[apollokepler]

oh i sure hope i don't accidentally strike this little match across this teeny tiny matchbook !!! i don't even want to think of what could happen if i were to somehow set fire to this gasoline-filled church !!! oh me oh my oh me oh my !!! oh my goodness !!! everything is burning !!! !!! !!! 🔥⛪🔥🚒🧯🪦💐 (i am deceased)

[TheRPGNerd]

The melody reminds me of the game end roll /pos

Also reminds me of the phrase "a child shunned by the village will burn it to feel it's warmth"

[LevitheEldritchAbomination]

"Ain't it funny you can't bear the same sort of agony you forced me to emulate" is a lime that hit so hard for me.

[undercovercorvyd]

WE MAKING IT OUT OF THE BURNING CHURCH WITH THIS ONE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[minisnormal]

THE CALLBACK TO HIGANBANA MILK TEA HOLY SHIT

[onehourzerominutes]

man i sure love it when i listen to vane and and my matches start rusting

[suredoeslikeexisting]

this better not make my city’s temperature higher than it already is

[namega]

God I wasn't expecting how soulful and oddly heartrending this sounds, it feels like a lullaby but in retrospect, like a child singing to themself; absolutely beautiful holy the callback to HMT is SO well done, the themes of abuse being justified through religion + violence passed on to children who prayed to the same god their abuser used to cover up their horrific actions are incredibly clear, tbh I can definitely see where the creative writing inspiration comes in here, your prose and poetry is legitimately gorgeous!! Kind of weird thing to say but I feel like you'd be a really good author, there's a very specific craft in synthesizing lengthy thoughts into single sentences and rhymes and you've really honed in on it I think

[apunnojustice]

gonna burn this into my mind so hard whoever autopsies my body will be able to play this song on my brain like a record

[MonochroMenace]

The video and the production on this track are awesome!! Apollo's vocals compliment the song perfectly too. This song is so awesome ahhhh

[mirror_raccoon]

for those that suck at singing along by ear
Lyrics:

Hundreds of years searching for a reason
As the time passes by in a lonely cry
Signs of a child lost to rusted seasons
Can you find glowing eyes
through the lunar lullaby's lie

Fragmented parts form relentless beating
Decorate winter days in a godless way
For sin never stays under sacred reasons
Yet I pray for escape in a
fantasy filled daze

And as your body hits the flame
Ill watch the motions of your twisted face
A sacrificial want a carnal rage
Awaken everything i learned to annihilate
And as your body hits the flame
You ask a silent god if its to late
When they find your battered body
Trust that your ashes will be
Drawn by matches and rust

Thousands of years slipping through my fingers
Imitate futile waves in a gentle blaze
Heaven exists for the lost and fearful
Can you find faithful eyes
through the lunar lullabies lie

Fragmented parts form relentless beating
Recreate winter days in a soulless way
For sin never stays under sacred reasons
So i pray for escape
In a fantasy filled daze

And even through the night
It seems I've come to find
You'll never face the light
The generational curse of our kind

And as your body hits the flame
I'll watch the motions of your melted face
Hey ain't that funny you can't bear the same
Sort of agony you forced me to emulate
And as your body hits the flame
You meet the burning of a child's rage
When they find your battered body
Trust that your ashes will be
Drawn by matches and rust

Matches and rust

[insertcryhere]

BABE WAKE UP VANE MADE A SONG THAT IS RELATED TO HIGABANA MILK TEA!!!!

Ok but in all honesty, APOLLOS VOCALS WERE SO GOOD THE ARTSTYLE WAS SO COOL AND I ABSOLUTELY ADORED THE MV THAT FRIEND DID !!!! AND THE SONG IS SO COOL AND AMAZING OMGGG!!??? You guys did SUCH an amazing job on this one! Hope to see more soon :)

[spookysleepyghost]

Vane, this song has me crying (/pos, I needed to get it out). Your talent with writing is amazing, and (vague tw ahead) as someone with cptsd from csa and recent abuse I've gotten out of finally, I'm using this song to heal a little. It IS as cathartic to me, and I just wanted you to know how much your art helps me. The lyrics are beautiful, the visuals are amazing, Apollo's vocals are absolutely gorgeous in this song and really help drive home the emotion in it. I loved every moment listening to this, thank you for making it!

[Brazilian_dysphoria]

It reminds me of how I was insisting on being christian but then I got baptized and then I realized I was not only polysexual but non-binary, I haven't come out to anyone about it but I just wanted to say thanks for this song, now I have something to listen to on full volume on the bus ride from school. (I get to add this to my relatable songs playlist!)

[Maismaika]

I’M SHEDDING TEARS THE MUSIC VANE MAKES IS SO GOOD OMG😭😭

[AcaisStuff]

Genuinely I managed to miss any indication that friend did the mv on this despite skimming the description, I just saw words flying around during the chorus(?) and was like “Oh that’s definitely friend!”

[ArtechnaYT]

THIS GOES SO

there’s a lot of mentions to prayer and just overall christianity making me think that this might be about religious trauma/abuse or being so broken one turns to religion. not really sure if that was the intention, but the lines “you ask a silent god if it’s too late” and “so i pray for escape in a fantasy filled daze” really makes me think. also the way that the church is cast in an eerie red…. really gives fallen angel vibes or something. it slaps so hard ❤️

[NocturnalDecay]

Gnawing at the bars of my enclosure thinking about the connections between this and higanbana milk tea bc of that outro... 10/10

[cosmic-courtroom]

this is. a very cathartic and painful track. im not over and i’ll never be over all my trauma and i’ve accepted that but, damn. seeing some of it here and how i still feel some of it here just gets to me.
vague cw.
i’ve been through csa and sa, religious trauma, abuse, and more and this seems to capture a lot of that. the beginning of “sin never hides away but i do and i try to pray away in a daze” you’re grasping for straws, for anything you hope will work. and it never does.
one of our abusers died last year around christmas and the end of the year, actually roughly around the time Scapeg♾️at was released and, that was the song that got us through the next few weeks and encompassed how we felt pretty damn well. but, this. this managed that also pretty well. the wanting of them gone, the wanting them burnt while you watch in tears, while you watch as they endure what you were forced to endure at their hand. it’s. :(. yeah. i get it.
hope you’re doing okay vane.