It’s Not Just You: No One Can Afford Kids Anymore

In our March video essay, Chelsea explores the myriad reasons millennials are having fewer kids, having them later, or just not having them at all. Spoiler alert: a lot of it has to do with money.

Disclaimer: This video is for educational purposes only.

SPECIAL THANKS TO:

SOURCE LINKS:

00:00:00 Society Information
00:00:53 Intro
00:04:47 Ad break
00:05:42 The Childfree Movement
00:16:25 A Brief History Of Reasons For Being Childfree
00:23:04 The Village: Then vs Now
00:31:48 Ad break
00:37:02 Societal-Level Implications Of Not Having Kids
00:44:21 How Difficult It Can Actually Be To Have Children
00:48:37 The Millennial Dichotomy: DINKs vs. Tradwives
01:00:01 Motherhood: The Impossible Choice For Women

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[parworld]

What Maggie forgot to mention is that A LOT of men talk a big game about parenthood & then completely switch it up once the baby arrives. So this idea that you can "vet" your partner is not as cut and dry as it sounds.

[kaw]

A Starbucks batista told me they were jealous of me being a stay at home mom to my son and I didn't have the heart to tell them I was forced out of the workforce because childcare costs more than minimum wage in my state.

[ericsmith]

“It takes a village” in an era where boomer and gen x parents relied on their parents to assist with childcare, but don’t want to provide the same assistance for their children…

[Tellmemoreyourstory]

I always tell myself "I'd rather regret not having children than regret having children"

[we-need-to-talk-about-it]

In Romania, which is a lesser known European country, there is a 2 year maternity leave during which the state pays 80% of your previous salary and it’s illegal for your company to fire you during your pregnancy or maternity leave and they have to welcome you back after your leave is over. Plus you have free daycare, school and university tuition. How the world’s wealthiest country doesn’t have any of these it’s just baffling.

[knittingdoula]

As someone with five kids, I cannot tell you how deeply I support women that are childless by choice. And it's not because I regret having children - quite the contrary. I want this level of sacrifice and love and heartache and pride and worry to be a true choice for any person considering parenthood. The stakes are too high.

[nicolef]

I have 2 boomer aunts who never had children, one actually makes clothes for her cats. My role models 👏👏👏

[khorwath]

New mom over here with a 7 month old. My husband and I have already had sooo many conversations about whether we can even financially consider having a second kid... and it baffles me how many family members (who had family support) tell us "oh don't wait, have another now.. you'll just figure it out"... im sorry this isn't a 6th grade math test I didn't study for. It's literally my family's financial future.

[VarricsBianca]

I don’t think the people who are pushing the “everyone should have kids” policies and limiting access to contraceptives and abortions are interested in making childcare easier. They know it’s expensive, and they want people to stay poor and living in poverty. It’s easier to take advantage of people that way.

[KatAnne]

Mom here. It is so incredibly life changing that unless you whole heartedly want it, don’t become a parent. That said, for me, it was 100% the right decision.

[kated]

My mother straight out told me, ''I can't wait for you to have children so I can watch them ruin your life the way you ruined mine''... so that made the choice pretty clear for me!

Also you gotta love governmental outcry at how ''they worry about us and our future'' because of aging populations! If they actually ever gave a rat's arse about helping parents afford children, making sure kids and pregnant women are safe and healthy, not gutting unions and worker protections left and right, making sure salaries follow inflation and food and homes and healthcare remain affordable? They sure have a STRANGE effin way to show it!

Never mind that the model of endless population growth is literally impossible to sustain on the long term...

[eehappy]

a friend recently said to me "i love being a parent but I wish I could be the dad". A lot of moms love being moms, they just resent how "having it all" seems to mean having to do all the work.

[PokhrajRoy.]

My favourite thing to observe in the ‘having less children’ discourse is seeing uncles who had remotely nothing to do with childcare be suddenly concerned about an ageing population that won’t help the heavy industry.

[marievento]

My Millennial daughter has WISELY chosen to be child-free and I couldn’t be more delighted with her decision! She has sidestepped a boatload of BS attached to the failure of this country to support families, and mothers in particular. She enjoys her work, her friends, her home, her cats, her LIFE

[Fanny-gege]

The biggest reason (if not the only reason) why I'm childfree (is it really by choice then?) is money issues. If we could live comfortably on one salary (by "living comfortably", I mean having a decent place to live, a car, healthy food on the table, new clothes, money for some activities outside the home and a little bit of money on the side in case of emergencies), then I would want to stay at home and raise kids. But what is the point in both parents working full time, having to spend half a salary in childcare, only to have someone else raise your kids for you and being annoyed at them when you come home from work because you're tired? There is literally no point.

[lesliellama]

I was child-free by choice for many years, and used the excuse "I haven't met the right person yet" to stop people from telling me what a bad person I am for such a selfish decision. As of this month I am also childless for medical reasons after having my uterus and ovaries removed due to debilitating endometriosis and PCOS. I'm only 32 (still single) and not looking forward to spending the rest of my life having to answer the "why" from people who don't understand why they're not entitled to my reasons or personal medical information.

[randaray]

I married in 1995 and it never ONCE occurred to me that I could choose not to be a mother. Well done millennials. Parenthood should absolutely be a conscious choice!!!

[yothiga]

In my country (Thailand), we called the current Millennial as “Generation Sandwiched” because in Asia we have to take care of our aging parents and pay for our own children which is much more expensive compared to the past at the same time. It’s One and Done for almost every family I know.

[okalanibergschneider]

I knew since I was 16 that I didn’t want to have children. I meet my husband when we were 21/22 and I told him that I didn’t want to have kids early on in our relationship. He was okay with that and eventually as years went on it became our decision to remain child free. He would defend me when people thought I should have a baby for him. In 2022 after over a decade together and five years of marriage my husband came to me saying he would like to have a vasectomy and make being childfree a permanent thing. We don’t regret our decision and know that it’s not a decision we came to lightly nor think is for everyone.

[mally]

Every mother I've ever talked to has told me that if I'm even a little bit on the fence about kids, DON'T HAVE THEM. They've all said it's ONLY worth it if you're absolutely in love with and crazy about the idea of parenthood, which I'm not and never have been, and neither has my partner. We will be enjoying our childfree lives, happily!