heartbreak (playlist)

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I know this comment will probably get lost in the comment section but when I was 9 and 10 I was getting bullied everyday at school and every night I would cry myself to sleep. I didn’t want to bother my parents because they were already busy enough. At the age of 12 I was diagnosed with depression and I didn’t understand why I couldn’t be happy anymore. At 13 I started drinking and at 14 I started smoking. It escalated from there, I began witchcraft and carrying crystals because all I wanted was happiness. I had a boyfriend whom was my first love at 15 but he OD and I lost him too soon, it felt like no one was there for me and I would drain myself everyday to force a smile. A couple months before I turned 17 I was dragged to this event at a church even though I didn’t believe in God, I finally felt the love I’ve been searching for in drugs. I felt such peace, love and Joy something I lost many years ago, and all I could do was cry because it was like a very much needed hug and that person hugging you just would hold onto you and tell you everything’s going to be okay. I struggled getting clean but now I’m 2 years clean and I have converted into Christianity, I do still struggle every now and then but I now have peace. Everything will be okay just don’t search in drugs for peace

YazairaG
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"tears are words that the heart can't express" -Whitney Fancher

luznoceda
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It just hurts so bad. It really hurts. No matter how much I tell myself I don’t care it hurts like hell and nothing can change that ever

joshuaahmed
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it’s like every time i believe i finally found someone that values me, it all gets taken away so fast, i’m so freakin tired and heart broken i just want to go to sleep and never wake up

skeleton
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I miss him more than I remember him. I miss his laugh, his smile, his eyes and his comfort. But you are gone to a better place, rest in peace love

babysis
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I loved him no matter how much I tried to deny it. He left me. He promised me that he would never break my heart and he broke it. He also said we were going to continue to be friends and I was blocked the next day. I can't begin to describe how much he hurt me. Even with all the hurt, I can't seem to let him go.

IzzyZub
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this will just get lost in the comments but i dont mind. When i was 8 my mum lost custody of me because she had an episode and my dad staryed looking after me. He would starve me for daya because he forgot i was there and would hit me if i pestered him. When i turned 9 he got a new girlfriend and introduced us and she was so sweet. She was literally an angel. She showed me love i had never felt before. One day my dad was drunk while watching the football and his team lost. She was sat in my room reading with me, when we could hear him screaming and throwing things in the living room. She took me im her arms and hugged me while he screamed. In that moment i just cried. She just hugged me for nearly 40 minutes playing with my hair. In that moment i felt true love. She was so calm and just hugged me, it was so comforting. When i turned 13 my mom died because she had another episode (she was very depressed and also bipolar ) she lost controll at the wheel and died that night. When my dad found out he broke down. He shut down completely and just locked everyone out, he didnt go to work and just completely lost himself. This caused him and his girlfriend to get into a big fight and she left, i cried for days because she was basically my mom and now my acctual mom was gone she was all i had. She never even said goobye. I continued living with my dad and slowly together we got better, he stopped drinking and we started bonding a lot. He was really trying but it was never the same. I completely lost touch with his ex girlfriend till early may when i was out getting shopping and spotted her, i didnt want to say anything because it had been 3 years and i didnt know if it was her. She approaxhed me and just broke down. In that moment i knew it was her. I moved out of my dads house end of may and now im living with her. She showed me true unconditional love. Even though i wasnt her blood daughter she loved me like one and i dont think ill ever feel love in the same way. My dad is such a goood person now and ive never been happier. I realky think love is a beautiful thing and you find it in the strangest places but irs always there. You just have to searxh for it. Anyone reading this is beautiful and so strong. Keep going because there is light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how long the tunnel is there is an end and there is light at the end.

xtrinityspdr
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Some people are going to leave, but that's not the end of your story. That's the end of their part in your story 🥀

Bored_soul
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30 mins ago he just threw a 2 yr relationship away..

alex-xvxb
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100 reasons to stay alive:
1. to make your parents proud
2. to conquer your fears
3. to see your family again
4. to see your favourite artist live
5. to listen to music again
6. to experience a new culture
7. to make new friends
8. to inspire
9. to have your own children
10. to adopt your own pet
11. to make yourself proud
12. to meet your idols
13. to laugh until you cry
14. to feel tears of happiness
15. to eat your favorite food
16. to see your siblings grow
17. to pass school
18. to get tattoo
19. to smile until your cheeks hurt
20. to meet your internet friends
21. to find someone who loves you like you deserve
22. to eat ice cream on a hot day
23. to drink hot chocolate on a cold day
24. to see untouched snow in the morning
25. to see a sunset that sets the sky on fire
26. to see stars light up the sky
27. to read a book that changes your life
28. to see the flowers in the spring
29. to see the leaves change from green to brown
30. to travel abroad
31. to learn a new language
32. to learn to draw
33. to tell others your story in the hopes of helping them
34. Puppy kisses.
35. Baby kisses (the open mouthed kind when they smack their lips on your cheek).
36. Swear words and the release you feel when you say them.
37. Trampolines.
38. Ice cream.
39. Stargazing.
40. Cloud watching.
41. Taking a shower and then sleeping in clean sheets.
42. Receiving thoughtful gifts.
43. “I saw this and thought of you."
44. The feeling you get when someone you love says, “I love you."
45. The relief you feel after crying.
46. Sunshine.
47. The feeling you get when someone is listening to you/giving you their full attention.
48. Your future wedding.
49. Your favorite candy bar.
50. New clothes.
51. Witty puns.
52. Really good bread.
53. Holding your child in your arms for the first time.
54. Completing a milestone (aka going to college, graduating college, getting married, getting your dream job.)
55. The kind of dreams where you wake up and can’t stop smiling.
56. The smell before and after it rains
57. The sound of rain against a rooftop.
58. The feeling you get when you’re dancing.
59. The person (or people) that mean the most to you. Stay alive for them.
60. Trying out new recipes.
61. The feeling you get when your favorite song comes on the radio.
62. The rush you get when you step onto a stage.
63. You have to share your voice and talents and knowledge with the world because they are so valuable.
64.Breakfast in bed.
65. Getting a middle seat in the movie theater.
66. Breakfast for dinner (because it’s so much better at night than in the morning).
67. Pray (if you are religious)
68. Forgiveness.
69. Water balloon fights.
70. New books by your favorite authors.
71. Fireflies.
72. Birthdays.
73. Realizing that someone loves you.
74. Spending the day with someone you
75. Opportunity to create meaningful and lasting relationships.
76. Potential to learn, grow, and evolve as a person.
77. Joy and happiness in the little things.
78. The power to inspire others.
79. The ability to create art, music, and other forms of self-expression.
80. To explore different cultures, traditions, and ways of life.
81. To make a positive impact on the environment and help protect the planet.
82. Experience the joys of parenthood and raise a family.
83. Learn new things and develop new skills.
84. Create a legacy that will outlive you.
85. Being wrapped up in a warm bed.
86. Cuddles
87. Holding hands.
88. The kind of hugs when you can feel a weight being lifted off your shoulders. The kind of hug where your breath syncs with the other person’s, and you feel like the only two people in the world.
89. Singing off key with your best friends.
90. Road trips.
91. Spontaneous adventures.
92. The feeling of sand beneath your toes.
93. The feeling when the first ocean wave rolls up and envelops your toes and ankles and knees.
94. Thunderstorms.
95. Your first (or hundredth) trip to Disneyland.
96. The taste of your favorite food.
97. The child-like feeling you get on Christmas morning.
98. The day when everything finally goes your way.
99. Compliments and praise.
100. to look on this moment in 10 years time and realize you did it.
Ps : Never forget you are a beautiful person 💕 Life is so beautiful so live, l love you <3

ratlook
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Love hurts so much that only tears can explain how much it does.

kiaragomes
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It's painful when you know you have people to talk to, but you really don't want to be annoying, so you just don't talk about what's wrong, and it starts to become so overwhelming. It's getting hard, man. I just want to be happy

isabellemorrison
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I just realised that I'm in love and that its the same for her and I wanted a playlist to match my mood. I fell on this playlist randomly and just before I wanted to swipe, I pictured an imaginary story of me and her together...till the breakup...and at the end of each song, we went on back together.

landrynoune
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I loved her, I really did love her. My stupidity and mistake was what cost us. I would do anything to be with her again. It hurts me that we had to end on such a bad note. She losing complete trust in me. It is already hard to lose someone who matters so much to my life, saying morning to each other every day. It's even harder to pretend that I still don't love her, it harder to pretend that she doesn't feel anything for me. Every time I look at our chat logs, I cry inside. I wish I was a better person for her

vuminhkhang
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it’s been three years. i knew she wasn’t interested all that time ago. i can’t handle it when she’s near or far away. whenever i see her my heart stops, and when i think about how there will be a moment that will be the last i see her, i go numb. confessing didn’t help, i never got a call. I’ve been so angry. so so angry, at her, at him. but now all it is is despair. loss of something i never had.

my heart won’t let go

A, i love you, with all i am, and i know there’s nothing either of us can do now

EDIT: Been doing better recently, if it helps anyone, know that there is always hope for better futures, whether with or without them. All their beauty can be found in the world, and within yourself.

isves_
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I try to act like I don't care.
I try to act like it doesn't matter anymore.
I try to put my feelings aside.
I try to act like nothing ever happened.
I try to act like I didn't love them as much as I did.
I try to act like I'm not a failure.
I try to act like I don't care about them anymore.
I try to deny it.
I try to tell myself I will be okay when I won't.
I try to act like I'm okay.
I try to act like I didn't actually love them.
I try to act like their wonder didn't mean the most to me.
But deep down I know how much it actually hurt me and now I can't do anything about it, and I have to move on without saying or doing anything.

iloveurmom
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im crying rn, im not sad maybe ia bit, I have been paralyzed for 2 yrs, i have was we suspect is a brain inflamation, elher danlos and crps, i havent walked for 2 yrs and i was barely walking befort then, when i stoped walking drs didnt listen i have been doing my own physio for 2 yrs and finaly today. i finaly did it after hours and days of work. some days my legs r in to much pain to move some days i know moving will cause them to spasm and some days im stuborn. Today i walked to my bathroom, with no physio with no support no medication im in agorny i wanna scream cry laught. but i just took 10 steps for the first time in 2 yrs i walked to the bathroom. im just sad drs never helped. I shouldnt of done it alone but i did and im proud.

musicman
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TRACKLIST
0:03 All I Want - Kodaline
5:13 worldstar money (Interlude) - Joji
7:47 If the World Was Ending (feat. Julia Michaels) - JP Saxe
11:26 The Story Never Ends - Lauv
15:13 listen before i go - Billie Eilish
19:17 Falling Apart - Michael Schulte
22:37 drivers license - Olivia Rodrigo
26:43 jealousy, jealousy - Olivia Rodrigo
29:39 Fourth of July - Sufjan Stevens
34:16 Freaks - Surf Curse
36:41 The Loser - Verzache
38:53 Heal - Tom Odell
42:18 It's Ok - Tom Rosenthal
44:57 Lights Are On - Tom Rosenthal
48:05 How To Lose a Girl - Tyler Ward
51:34 Alien Blues - Vundabar
54:12 I'll See You Again - Westlife
59:32 Ykwim? - Yot Club
1:03:03 The Loser - Verzache
1:05:16 When We Were Young (Live) - Adele
1:09:59 Again - Timmies & Shiloh Dynasty
1:12:36 Water Fountain - Alec Benjamin
1:16:15 Moral of the Story - Ashe
1:19:36 Space Song - Beach House
1:24:56 everything i wanted - Billie Eilish
1:28:59 lovely - Billie Eilish & Khalid
1:32:19 Wings - Birdy
1:36:46 Boys Like You - Anna Clendening
1:40:45 Toxic - BoyWithUke
1:43:34 All That I Know - Cian Ducrot
1:46:31 Wild Enough - Elina
1:49:39 Falling - Harry Styles

tilalorenza
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20 minutes ago the love of my life left me now I got nothing but the love I still have for her.

xxpwuwt
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I loved her, I actually loved her, but she didn’t love me as much as i loved her, because someone who loves you, wont steal all your friends, turn them against you, let them call you slurs and make fun of your self Harm, and they definitely wont paint you out as the crazy one, use your depression, anxiety and autism against you, she never loved me, i was just a toy for her to play with.

Sulkyfairy