how to find your gender expression

hey guys! this week I wanted to have a really honest chat to hopefully give some insight to people who maybe struggle to find their gender expression. I love you guys and I hope you can find this helpful.

love always
-Mak

[Makingemi]

Trying to get to as many comments as I can on this video because I know this stuff sparks personal questions!!! Ill be checking back tonight to get to more people! Love you guys

[cadesboye]

as a smol baby gay, I appreciate this, you're an honest genuine no bullshit person for us to look up to. Love you for it ❤

[rey._rose]

As a lesbian teenager whose family isn't supportive, Mak's videos have helped me come to terms with so much about myself . In the start of my freshman year, I got outed to my whole friend group all at once while sitting at our lunch table talking about crushes. The only person who I had told accidentally let it slip that I liked girls. I can remember it as if it just happened. My face felt hot and there was this loud noise in my ears, I felt like I was suffocating, like I couldn't breathe. I was in such a shock and a panic that the only words I could get out were "oh shit." . I looked around at my friends shocked faces and all I could think is that its over, I've lost all my friends, my secret is out. This actually wasn't the case though. Most of my friends had been asking if I'm gay since the fifth grade, its always just been obvious, but I was in an environment where I was told it was wrong so I always denied it to the people around me. There was 2 out gay guys in our group but even they we kind of ultra conservative like the rest of them so I was still scared. But it was ok. They were kinda surprised but it ended up fine. their faces of shock and disbelief turned into sympathy and they told me it was ok. They said they'd always support me and always be their for me and i felt this wave of relief wash over me. These people are like my family now, I've never felt safer than I do with them. Even though the way they found out wasn't ideal for me, Id like to believe that it was part of Gods plan for me and that it was meant to happen. I go to a catholic school, so to find a group like mine where we were all accepting and loved each other was rare. I've still been called slurs and had people give me a look of disgust when they overhear a conversation about the girl im into, but from watching Maks videos I know that I will get better. One day, Ill move out, Ill find a girl I love, We'll buy a house and start a family and everything will be ok. I have hope for my and everyone else like myself futures. Thanks for showing us it gets better Mak.

[juicemonster]

I found out I was non binary a while back and Mak had a hand in it. I had always felt pretty uncomfortable presenting at all feminine. I after all was a 6’7 black dude to most people who knew me. I had Christian parents and grew up in an extremely abusive and homophobic household. Once I moved out I was so conflicted with who I thought I was and the friends I had who I knew would shame me for who I wanted to be. I moved out at 18 after my mom threw me on the street. I came across creators like Mak and a few others and found myself identifying with their sense of style and flare and the confidence to be who they are despite their struggles. I turn 20 in a few weeks but to anyone of any age if you ever feel like you’re alone you aren’t. If you feel like you can’t change know that you can. It’s a journey and it has its ups and downs but don’t give up. Keep it pushing💖 I dressed as a nurse for Halloween last year and sometimes I kiss boys. For many it doesn’t sound like much but to me it’s something I will never take for granted.

[weewaa]

the part about recognizing that you have hidden parts of yourself for so long while many people around you have been confidently expressing themselves for ages is so important and really validating to hear right now ❤

[ArtificialSuicid]

Once I saw a tweet that said: "If your mom doesn't like your clothes, then you're probably doing something right". I know it sucks to hear people you love criticising you, but they've learned it this way, we can only work to be comfortable in ourselves, so don't let nobody make you ashamed of doing what you want.

[LorieHassy]

Hi! I'm grateful for this video because it made me think. It works the opposite way around too, you know? I am a straight girl who grew up with her dad, and always leaned towards masculine clothes. But I always envied girls who dressed so elegant and romantic with all the flower patterns and stuff. Only in my 20s did i allow myself to try being girly, soft, unguarded. It was a mental battle, trust issues and stuff. Today I don't feel weak if i wear a long dress and let my hair grow out. Just needed the confidence to try - so i totally agree.

[bren]

"Welcome that curiosity and honour it", I really needed to hear this. I just started exploring my style, and I often second guess because of fear of judgement. I still have a long journey ahead to truly find myself. But I'm done hiding, I will continue to honour my curiosity! Thank you for making this video, you're an inspiration.

[jessieworsham]

I'm just now allowing myself to dress in a way that feels authentic. Even though I'm in my 30s, I realized it's never too late! Thanks, Mak, for all the encouraging videos. It means a lot. 💜

[yourfavouritepigeononyt]

i don’t think mak ever realises how much she helps the queer community as a whole i hope she understands at least a fraction of the support she gives and we give her in return <3

[hannarchy]

It's so cool to see people out here doing amazing stuff like you. As somebody who transitioned over the last year or two, the idea of honouring your curiosity REALLY struck home for me. One of the first (and best) things I did was browse cheap online clothes stores and just go with whatever struck me. No second-guessing, no judging myself, once I had an idea for sizes I just grabbed anything that caught my eye if I could afford it. Surprisingly, I've only had a couple of misses - I love just about everything I bought from that period. Which, I feel, is another key part of the queer experience - learning that you can actually trust your feelings. Cis-heteronormativity constantly tells you that you can't, but I promise you can. You know what you need and what you want, your feelings are valid and real and you can trust them

[xeniahaberditz]

The part about unlearning is so true. My journey was tomboy until middle school, then felt that I needed to wear dresses and skirts because I'm a girl. Did an exchange year in Japan during that time with school uniform and all, the gender envy I felt towards the boys was unreal. That's also were I felt the least comfortable in my body. That was 10y ago. I only really started to express myself with more masc clothing about 5y ago and I've been trying lots of things like a binder a year ago. I'm at a place where I'm happy with my gender expression and also able to speak up for myself, eg no dress for formal wear but a masc suit. Anyway, good luck on anyone on the journey 🧡 I'm rooting for you !

[intergalactic_butterfly]

I'm in my unlearning phase, not just in a gender sense, but a neurological sense, and that intersection is soooo challenging!! Been unlearning for almost two years, and I still don't think I'll be authentic and comfortable with myself for some time unfortunately :( 
You, among your internet contemporaries, give me hope and inspiration. I appreciate you and your content, even if I don't always watch every video of yours. <3

[rosephinebakerson]

I had a critical queer awakening while consuming your thoughtful and funny content. When my now-gf asked if I have a "type", I answered with you (she was flattered because you two bare a striking resemblance, but I was also flirting so thanks for the assist). That was a year ago; we live happily together in our little oasis in Missouri and are building a life together.
I've been in the process of exploring my gender identity for quite some time, but only just recently have come out to her and select folks around me. This video couldn't have had better timing.
Thank you. I wish you and your LDR the best. I'll DM you a wedding invite when I propose next year 😉

[kas]

I love “honor your curiosity”! Good stuff, thanks for sharing!

[marylouis-ylpv]

I got outed by my teacher to my entire school last week, immediately came to this channel to make me feel better and am slowly finding my style. thankyou x

[kierayerdon]

I came out at 14 as bi and my style kinda stayed the same I just was more confident in what I liked and just more confident in general! Thank youu for the representation!

[mariannetfinches]

Wise beyond her years. I would have hugely benefited from content like this growing up. So happy this is available for those who need it 😊

[lilydeboda]

I used to feel very insecure about shopping in the men’s section. I wouldn’t even set foot in it because I thought people would judge me or something. I have very big and wide feet, so it’s hard to find shoes that fit in the woman’s section. A really long time ago, I was shopping for doc martens except they only had ones that would fit in men’s. Inside, I was panicking, so I refused it. Now I know that that was so stupid. Late 2022, I went into the men’s section to find hoodies and had never been so in awe. Really wish I had overcome the delusion that clothes have a gender and had just gotten those amazing doc martens. They were really so cool.

[silverhoneycat]

There really is a privilege between those who already fall comfortably under heteronormative styles/roles and those that have a more complex journey. I'm learning SO much! Mak, creators like you are trailblazing the way to universal understandings, empathy, and allyship, and I'm just so grateful education like this is more accessible and being normalized. Stay the course for as long as you can- It's helping a lot of people! Thank you 🙌