How Do I Know if I Have Emotional Trauma #AskATherapist

How Do I Know if I Have Emotional Trauma #AskATherapist //

Have you ever wondered if you have emotional trauma? How do you know if you've been traumatized? Watch this video to learn the difference between physical and emotional trauma and resources that can help.

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[lisam]

I like the comment 'this is not the Olympics of suffering'. Not comparing trauma, not saying one person's trauma is worse and more valid, etc., is so important. Your trauma is your trauma and how it affects your life is valid, period.

[The_Serpent_of_Eden]

We're all just layers and layers of trauma. Some of it really blunt and brutal, some of it subtle and nefarious. Some of us are mostly scars, some of us are bleeding wounds. We need to treat each other softly and gently. And we really, really, really need to treat ourselves that way too.

[madmad]

I've been told that my experiences were nothing and that I needed to get over them by the people that were inflicting the trauma. I've stopped standing up for myself in situations out of the fear of people ridiculing and saying "get over it it's not that big of a deal." I've internalized it so much to the point where before I started writing this comment I almost stopped myself because I've been conditioned to think that my feelings and pain was just me overreacting and me being sensitive. I still struggle to call it trauma because it feels like it was just a joke I took the wrong way. I cannot count how many times I've heard "you're overreacting" "well it could be worse" or "that wasn't what you were experiencing you just took it the wrong way." I've even been laughed at for opening up about my past experiences and I think I have trauma from that because my feelings have been invalidated over and over, I now just subconsciously invalidate them on my own to avoid the pain of being told that I wasn't actually hurt. God, I really need better friends.

[martharodas]

the quote "this is not the olympics of suffering" was shocking, sometimes I dont take my anger or sadness too serious because i feel like I dont have it worst than others or am not in a place to feel the way I actually feel. Thank you for that.

[ArtistLynneSleiman]

"This isn't the Olympics of suffering." Yeeees, thankyou!

I struggled with the loss of home (because of a big move) and not being as close to my family and friends, lossing a community, the loss of healthy coping strategies that I had (enjoying nature) the landscape looking totally different.. the stress of not knowing where any stores were. Just, whole world turned upside down. People who have had a big and different and scary move can understand this. But so many people around me just couldn't get it. They hadn't experienced a big move and that many losses so the response was very much unhelpful and quite hurtful more often because they wanted me to just get over the loss. A decade later, I am doing much better, but it very much felt like a death. As I have read about losses from death, this loss of home has felt very much the same. And possibly if the people around me were a tad more empathetic, well, maybe I wouldn't have gone into complicated grief for a while if I had more support from them. Anyway, my loss was compared to "not as bad" as a death (for instance) but that didn't help me "get over it" sooner. I am finding my way though.
Thanks for your videos! 😁

[naomigreen]

When I was going through tough times as a kid one of my coping mechanisms was to just ignore them, not dwell on them, try to forget them, not process the trauma at all.

Now as an adult who's in a healthier space, occasionally my brain will go, "Hey, remember that thing that you weren't equipped to deal with way back when? Well, you're equipped now and I want you to properly process it now so we can heal. Here ya go."

And the next thing I know I'm crying my tears out for a stuffed bunny that was forcibly taken from me when I was five. A stuffed bunny that I almost certainly would have thrown out by now had I kept it.

[heather]

I've been seeing a therapist just as a sort of preventative "everyone should have counseling" mindset. I even felt awkward at first that I'm happy and don't have much to discuss. But I'm so glad I started going cause she found emotional trauma in the death of my mom, and so many things I do in relationships stem from that feeling of abandonment. It's exactly like you said, my world felt safe and then I found out it wasn't. Working through that has really opened the door for healthier ways of dealing with the triggers when I start to feel unsafe.

[kory_misun]

People tell me that I shouldn't be traumatized or triggered by the death of my favorite manager at work, because we're not blood related and I'm taking his passing harder than I took my grandmother's (which happened two weeks after my manager's).
My grandmother had a loving family and got to live an entire life. My manager was only 26, and his life ahead, all his potential was stolen from him.
When I think about the beautiful weather he'll miss out on, the vacations he'll never get to take, how his first video game will never be made, I cry and cry and cry.
I still work at the same place, and can't help but compare my current managers' performance/lack of compassion to how he always uplifted and listened to everyone around him.

[syrollesse]

Trauma can be as small as a baby being left to cry for hours and no one coming to comfort it. All of our problems and demons stem from unavoidable micro-traumas that just happens to everyone. Even "perfect parents" will unintentionally traumatise their children. The degree and impact it has on your adult life will be different but it still leaves a mark. Not to say that now we are all doomed, quite the opposite. As soon as we accept each and every one of us has trauma the easier it will become to heal

[tfkrockhard]

I'm struggling with a church hurt that I had for three years. I've told myself that I didn't need church and that I hate religion, but I love Jesus. I think I've found a church family that can help me with my struggle. God has been softening my heart and telling me that when I say that I don't need church (the people in it), I am prideful. I felt unheard and unseen when I needed help.

[anxen]

Being pushed out of your therapist office abruptly because of the end of the session. honesty, that's really traumatising, and causes flashbacks of being shoved out in the middle of the night during violent parent's rampage when you were a young child. for example cough cough

[roftherealm]

The biggest help for my emotional trauma has been finding meaningful connections. I've had friends come to me assuming that my mental health improved because of one thing, but the truth is, I've made the most progress when I've had a vast network of support. A therapist I work well with, a doctor who listens and validates me, a spiritual leader who helps me heal, living and supportive friends and family, some friends and strangers who have been through what I've been through, yoga, journaling, medication... It takes hard work, time, and resources to heal and it is so worth it!

[VermisTerrae]

For me, I think the first real step to healing was allowing myself to feel angry, betrayed, even furious that I was treated so poorly. Not everyone handles trauma the same way of course, but in my case I diminished my own value so much that I only felt afraid and helpless. The moment I felt genuine anger towards my abusers for how I was treated was the moment I began to truly value myself. Also, get care specifically from a trauma-informed therapist! I never thought I could face my triggers, but I've really surprised myself with my own resilience and bravery :) You can take your power back. You can thrive. And you deserve to!

[wolfboy]

That part where you described yourself taking half a year to get over a break up is soo damn relatable!!! Like i got rejected among other things(my fault) and it fucking hurts! Being reminded of that is hard to deal with and being triggered by memories can be traumatic as fuck...

[leahtheanimationfan]

After I moved out and wasn't trapped in my toxic family situation anymore, I thought I had let it go. I thought I had gotten over it. It took me until this year (3 years after I moved out) to realize that the emotional trauma is still affecting me. Thankfully I have a pretty solid support system, and I started meeting with a therapist a few months ago to help me work through things. My boyfriend, his parents, and my dad and stepmom have been the biggest supporters in helping me learn to be strong and stand up for myself.

[jaimeeknapton]

Hi Johnathan! I wanted to suggest talking about how to express to loved ones who's love language is actions that you dont want them to try and fix your problem but just listen and support you. Most of the people in my life want to help when I'm upset but all I really want is solidarity as I fix the problem myself. Thanks and I love your videos!

[butterfllycrochetcrafts]

I have been a emotional and financial abusive marriage for 24 yrs and it recently turn physical. I have endured as long as I could because children are involved including disabled children. At this my biggest trigger is my autistic son. It has come out he has been told from a young age I abused him as a baby and this caused him to have autism. This is crushing to me and even though he is now an adult he is being brought up parenting plan for the younger children. He has so much anger towards me and it has cut me so deep I struggling to avoid triggers and work through these triggers. I has and does as well as other things affected my work and daily life.

[juliemassam]

I needed to hear this today. Got some family in my life who refuse to see that I have emotional trauma or they think I can just fix it.

[genesismarsala]

My mother died when I was 17. She was sick ever since I was 5 years old. She never told me what was wrong but I just remember her being flippant with her health and just taking her 8 different medications. The only thing I learned was that she had diabetes. She never watched her diet and didn't seem to care that she was getting worse. There were a lot of other things that just made her health worse but she refused to change. I now have abandonment issues through death and I'm a hypochondriac because of her. I had a break down when I was diagnosed with an overactive thyroid. But with help from a friend's mom, I realized that with all my healthy eating and exercise, I can't fight genetics. But because I do pay attention to my health, if I do have something happen it would be a lot less than if I were to have been unhealthy. I'm 39 and I'm still healing from what happened so long ago. This is my trauma.

[emillydelefrati]

You could talk about how money and financial stuff can be a big trigger. I am a brazilian and here the economic situation is getting worst everyday, when I buy stuff(even when I know its essential) I experience severe anxiety and sometimes panic attacks