When life keeps knocking you down

When life keeps knocking you down. I was chatting with a friend the other day and we were talking about how it can seem that everything is conspiring against you. It seems like life just keeps knocking you down and every time you think you have a “victory” something else happens. I went through this a lot during the first few years of this “experience” and I wanted to share my thoughts about this.

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Duane DSD
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[HealingBeyondTrauma]

That's part of the abuse, are they condition us to live in that self-abusing pattern. So glad you broke out! <3 I still wax and wane with this, some days I'm centered, grounded and living in the possibilities other days I'm struggling.

[Shasha]

Fears/doubt cancel prayer....lack of faith. God is real. Focus on the good. God bless! It is how you are vibrating...go for a walk in the sunlight and pray while walking only thanking God for the good. My life crashed when my health crashed due to heavy metals/gluten and I lost my job. I was afraid to be in public...felt like I needed to leave my town. Felt like a failure, but I did nothing wrong, but be sick. What you focus on you can created. Think only positive no matter what.

[steveneardley]

It's so odd. Yesterday, the publisher accepted my book, and I hadn't even quite digested how good that was (after many rejections), and then today I had a bad auto accident--no one hurt but definitely worrying my ass off, about money. And then this video comes up in my feed. And I really needed to hear this.

[AmandaMae]

YouTube suggested your video today and I just wanted to say ‘Thank You!’ Your message and how you delivered it was exactly what I needed to hear. Your perspective on ‘life’ helped me change my thought pattern on my situation. I feel better about where I am and thankful for what I’ve overcome. You are changing lives for the better! 💚✨

[Sapperb]

Life will always knock us down. Just gotta get back up. So what it knocked you back a couple steps. Take the step forward. Build a better tomorrow

[suzannebrown]

Thank You Duane! You have helped me sooo much. Though I am a woman and my kids are grown, you were the 1st Narc Survivor I found who was in the nightmare for a long period, as I was. I finally divorced him 2 years ago after 32 years. I still cry everyday. So hard to accept still sometimes. BUT I am getting better and feeling life will go on and I will eventually be good. You have a very genuine, non judgemental, KIND way about you. So happy for you that you found your way out of the dark and grateful you still continue to help us. Sincerely, Thank You.

[cwb]

Great topic. So true. I had another knock down this week and for the longest time I had a pity party for the bs I had to deal with. I remember forcing myself to accomplish one thing a day. Just one. Soon I felt I was making some progress in my life. I’ve etched out a good life and I’m starting to get excited about where my life is going. Your ending point is probably the most important. Would you trade where you are now to where you were. For me it’s an absolute no.

[SilentFigure]

Yes and Thanks for all you have shared.

[runwiththewind]

Duane, thank you for helping me understand.

[kimberlybellefontaine]

yes !! thank you. i do currently kinda feel this way. my life is chaotic right now. divorce was final just 6 months ago after a long 2 years (and after a very long and toxic 21 years of marriage ..😢). he’s been shooting his arrows and dragging me back to court ever since the divorce was final ... 4 times in the past 3 months to the tune of another $6500 after a $50, 000 divorce😭. i feel like i can barely catch my breath, constantly in fight or flight mode, almost paralyzed w/ fear & exhaustion at times and unable to do just normal daily things. i really feel like i need at least a year-long nap right now. it’s exhausting to say the least, isn’t it ?? worst part is still the worry and guilt i’ll feel for the rest of my life concerning my kids😢. but looking forward to being able to breathe again and perhaps maybe even genuinely smile again one day ....

[joanwashington]

You have the right to heal, survive and live your life any way you choose. Your channel is your channel and even if she finds out, then what? Your viewers don't know her. You are no longer married to her and you have no obligation or responsibility towards her outside of your children. You keep doing what you're doing and don't worry about what the narc thinks. They always have a problem with every solution.

[TheWizechatmgr]

I too almost always find myself worrying about the worst - the reality is most of the crap thrown at us is just that, crap. It only worries us because we truly worry about the children. To us the children are not a means to a particular end.

[pegasus]

Stay strong!!
You are helping so many people.

[mariealex]

Wow! Duane! So far your channel is my best friend as for me a recovering ex Jehovah's witness. Thank you

[askyeshka]

I want to tell you a story. I think it is
applicable. Have you heard the expression "waiting for the other shoe to drop"? I am going to tell you where that saying came from. There was a man living in an upstairs apartment And a man living in a downstairs apartment. The upstairs resident was a drinker who came home late at night when the downstairs resident was sleeping. When the upstairs man took off his shoes they made a thud that woke the downstairs resident. The downstairs man put up with it for a long time. Finally he decided to approach the man and tell him that the way he took off his shoes was waking him up and disrupting his sleep. The next time the man came home drunk and took off one shoe and threw it he remembered what the downstairs man said. So he carefully took off his other shoe and set it gently down. Of course the downstairs man heard the first shoe thud because it woke him up.
He could not go back to sleep. An hour later he phoned the upstairs irritated " will you take your other shoe off already!" And that is where that saying came from. L'CHAIM!

[TheMaggie]

DSD your comment about not going back even for the finances- I am not divorced but think about it every day and I have days where working minimum wage & eating beans & rice seems better than dealing with my husband & financial security. I have a friend who divorced her doctor husband years ago & she told me that even though she is broke now, it's still better than dealing with him.

[Homeandchild]

God really needed to hear this. Thank you!

[Oz-qxzw]

Hi DSD, completely love the topic of this video! Beautiful scenery by the way, great taste in nature for an uplifting video most of us are seeking. Thank You

[charlottemyers]

This is in PART the song that comes to mind. Its Toby Mac's Knocked Down. Great song!

We lose our way,
We get back up again
It's never too late to get back up again,
One day you're gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever,
Lose our way,
We get back up again,
So get up, get up,
You gonna shine again,
Never too late to get back up again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever
(May be knocked down but not out forever)

[movingforward]

I got my decree absolute today. I am trying to keep to the hybrid no contact. Hopefully in our children's generation this kind of behaviour will be recognised - people will be believed and perpetrators stopped by the courts. I too am made to feel frightened. Your comments about everything going wrong hit the mark with me. I think it is because we are trying so hard to cope with an impossible situation that when something else goes wrong it is the last straw. I had the car thing. My ex controlled my independence - and so took the car that I had paid for as I was too scared to stand up to him in court. I got another cheap one but it died on me and this had a big impact for three months until I got another one. It allowed the level of control to increase significantly as I was dependent on him again. Anyway - I get it. I just practice staying calm - meditation, watching videos like this to remind myself it's actually quite common. You would be surprised how many people have gone through this kind of thing. I am still taking great strength from you saying that they show themselves to others and we don't have to do anything. This is starting to work for me, I'm pleased to say. You may laugh - but I have a Doctorate in psychology - I was a lecturer when I met him - yet he was still able to fool me. Of course, he dissuaded me from maintaining my career and it was with sheer willpower that I made sure he didn't stop me having at least some form of income.