Evaluating the Role of Rewards & Punishments in Parenting | Dr. Becky Kennedy & Dr. Andrew Huberman

Dr. Becky Kennedy and Dr. Andrew Huberman discuss the assumptions behind rewarding and punishing children, emphasizing the importance of fostering intrinsic motivation and trust in their inherent goodness.

Dr. Becky Kennedy is a clinical psychologist, bestselling author, and founder of Good Inside, an education platform for parents and parents-to-be. Dr. Andrew Huberman is a tenured professor of neurobiology and ophthalmology at Stanford University School of Medicine and host of the Huberman Lab podcast.

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[noheapai]

I don’t use punishment or reward. Chores are simply doing your part within our household. School work is on you I do not pressure them to get good grades, they do have to face the consequences if they don’t do the work. Bad behavior is a symptom of not knowing. So it’s a sign to me as a parent that there’s guidance needed. My aunt was at my house the other day and she commented on how easy things were with them. I didn’t have to constantly repeating myself or raise my voice. She also noticed how peaceful my home was. ❤

[martian]

This is wonderful. Excellent job getting valuable insight readily available within 10 minutes. Thank you, Huberman Lab team.

[newday]

Great video, I totally agree with not using the reward and punishment system. My goal always was to raise my kids to be independent good people. But also be there to encourage, coach them and be there if they fall. But children will at times they will fall or not always do the right thing. Their punishment should match the degree of it, but be dropped once it's over .. I believe in encouraging children and making the feel that what they helped you with, was important .
But most important to be there to listen to them.

[jimmyjames]

This lines up a lot with the Hunt Gather Parent book. Model good behavior, welcome help, and sometimes acknowledge when the child is being helpful.

[jkosinski]

Great discussion :) What caught my attention is the concept of being inherently good or bad and I think none of that is actually possible. Good and Bad is something created by adults (a set of rules/boundaries/desired behaviors that are perceived as good or bad) so I think the child is born neutral and we as adults shape them to become good or bad (or in other words fit the society or not).

[mlimrx]

Thank you for doing these clips, bite sized knowledge:)

[robshayz]

Beautiful explained thanks so much for sharing ❤

[brentg]

The lack of effort to learn how to cope with different emotions is what’s frustrating with kids. I realize they get overwhelmed emotionally easily but not trying to learn to work through it and defaulting to their comfort zone of freaking out is the most frustrating thing for me as a parent.

[abhinavdhami]

She has a nice point to make. Though some form of punishment and reward will always be there i think.

[generationrecon]

I like that, are you having an issue remembering to clean up, or maybe just need help building your skill of organizing toys after play time

[veronikadeneva]

Most adults cannot cope with their feelings all the time, not to mention kids. Rewards punishment system is valid for grown ups as well, I don’t know why this should be wrong for children.

[kaesees]

Skipping consequences worked great for Barbara Fried!

[bigdaddysaddy]

For being an expert this chick is all over the place. Also if you believe children are inherently good you don’t see “bad” behaviors as bad. You see it as curiosity, inexperience, or lack of knowledge. Parenting is natural when love is placed above everything else.

[theCombinator]

Better to do nothing. The endless complaini g from my parents about my foodmanners, realy turned me against them in my puberty. It was a precursur to rebel against them.
The eyes on my as a child. Not being able to it right was so much more damageable than a few more behavioural correct ways of doing things.
I hate eating with others, been 30 years now annoyed of how others eat.
I can't help but try to correct my own kids in eating..it's terrible.
So hard to break this trendline...
I woukd say. Skip it.
And ones in a while, have an adult talk with them. When you had a positive day with them.

[csteegs]

We live in a society that rewards and punishes, so socializing a child in that manner will be a benefit to her or him

[extrarobo]

Hloo
Can u talk about pitutary gland which helps for height growth

[marktaylor]

Put in to question the religious concept of original sin? So the starting point is no one can be trusted and therefore needs to be controlled

[PangetKano]

Do Americans really parent this way? I’m glad I’m raising my kids in Asia, Asian moms don’t have these problems.

[tito]

Economy of words. Get to the fucking point