What to Do When You Don’t Feel a Spark…

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[thecaptain]

My brother-in-law owes me big. He and my sister had a long distance relationship when they first started off. Once, he came to visit, and after he left, my sister, rather dismayed, said she was not feeling a spark. I told her love is not always a fireworks show, that sometimes it grows slowly, and that she shouldn't let herself get swept around by flights of fancy. She agreed. It helped her get her head on straight. Within about 6 months, they were engaged, and now are happily married with 3 kids. I proudly take the credit for that lol

[ShortDarknLovely]

The line to use is: we are not a match. If they ask any more questions, repeat the answer.

[stephanielux]

She shouldn't struggle. Men reject women all the time based on appearances, and he should have been honest about who he is in order to make sure he's finding the right partner for him. You shouldn't have to mislead anybody in order to get them to meet you and "give you a chance."

[tracyvalenzuela]

If he lied on his dating profile, he'll lie later on. Sure, maybe someone doesn't look exactly like their photo, but there were several differences not just one. He obviously did that on purpose.

[jennyonthecoast]

That's why it's important not to waste time getting to know someone without meeting and facetime before meeting to be safe and verify.

[CarrieLovesLife.]

When I was on the dating apps and I matched with someone, I asked to meet up for coffee almost right away, there is no way to know whether you are ACTUALLY going to be attracted to someone until you meet in person.
Attraction is largely an ‘energy’ thing, and you can’t determine it without meeting in person.

[tenzin]

I say my truth,
being authentic,
listen to my intuition,
my body said clearly "NO" to this man,
whom I had over several weeks online connection,
after our telephone call
I felt no attraction,
no connection,
nothing deeper,
feeling of boring conversation...

I felt very released,
happy to love myself ❤


(as I

[anneliesewright]

I think it's better to tell someone that you're just not attracted to them, as opposed to telling them their characteristics or personality traits aren't what you're looking for. Because no one can help who they're attracted to. A person can be very attractive, but that doesn't mean we're attracted. Hopefully, they will know that & understand.

[MeggyMoVlogger]

Ever since I listened to Matt and his book..I learned to say how I feel... I'll say it whether they get hurt or not rather not say it then they'll feel it distance. We adults and should take it like an adult.. that's just me. I have been quiet for so long and I'm not going to be coz I don't wanna be a bad person. Telling the truth is not being bad person.

[Kindness-vlhc]

Thank you so much for this episode. This came just in time! I needed to have the tough conversation with someone I went out on 4 dates. No chemistry - just friendship. I did it! Was brave! It actually went really well and he appreciated me bringing it up and felt hus respect towards me. Thank you for all the wonderful nuggets Audrey and Matthew ❤. PS. Love being part of Love Life Club. I have learned much. Love from Las Vegas.

[wendyclark]

One issue I haven't heard thus far about why she might feel anxious/uncomfortable about hurting his feelings, and afraid he might get mad: She could also very well be worried about her physical safety, but might feel "silly" about admitting to that; so many people scoff at it. I've been there, having my physical safety threatened by a couple of different "first-time" dates when they asked me out for a second date when I kindly responded that they weren't a match for me. In your client's case, it may not be the situation/concern for her, but it certainly was/has been for me, and others in these dating situations that are a "no thank you" for you.

[seven]

Something about his delivery and voice, he actually makes you feel like everything is going to be okay

[rachelpappin]

And if you want to end the relationship but are too afraid to tell them how you feel because of fear of hurting them, and not just lose them as a partner but as a friend too, but the things is it will hurt more living a lie in the relationship, and you should do what’s best for your well being, think to yourself, when I’m with this person, am I really happy ? 💁🏻‍♀️

[KA-uxqb]

Seems like she should remind herself and him that he lied/ mislead her.... she wasn't the bad guy.

[Calida]

I have never heard of "mate poaching" but that's terrifying. And Audrey's response is AMAZING made me think of the teammate dynamic in a whole new light! ❤❤❤

[ranabegum]

Thank you Mr and Mrs Hussey ❤

This part hit home - the thing your most afraid of has already happened and you have survived it!

Yessss the ship 🚢 ⬇️can't be sanked (because the captain is well experienced 🙌)

[bumblebee_ms]

Get into my sinkhole guys...hahahahaa!!!
I just finished reading your book, so many mind blown moments.

[bexsolo]

Does this mean you NEED a spark? Its confusing, some people say "real love" is actually built quite slowly. So, where is that line? Also, there are certain things I need to have a satisfying sex life, but haven't found a way to politely ask if a person meets that those needs without having sex. Ugh

[tristamarie]

Love Audrey on the podcast and provides great insight! Keep up the good work!

[frederick_blanding]

I really needed to hear this because I'm in a relationship that has lost its spark, and I don't feel in love anymore. I was struggling with the guilt of breaking up and worried it made me a bad person. But now, I realize my feelings don't make me a bad guy. What would make me a bad guy is staying in a relationship where I'm not fully committed or in love. Thank you for helping me see this clearly. ❤