She’s not in the Mood!

[annettenewcomb]

This man is the smartest man I’ve ever had the pleasure of listening to. His wife is lucky!!!

[PandoraKratos]

He wanted me to be his mother. Cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, and he didn't do ANYTHING to help with ANYTHING. I wasn't attracted to him anymore.

[bea]

PRESSURE 👏 KILLS 👏 DESIRE 👏 THIS RIGHT HERE!! 💯💯💯

[gardennerd]

This hits home for me. The emotional connection and the pressure are the stand outs. Also, the lack of touching and attention outside of the bedroom. So, when my husband hugs me or something I know he wants sex. It makes me feel used and allergic to being touched.

[accailiaagathism]

THE PRESSURE!!! The minute i feel like sex is EXPECTED, I no longer have any desire for it.

[j.k.]

I know all of those from personal experience and would like to add a fifth reason: She doesn't perceive you as a functional adult, but looks at you more like on a additional child. For me, I realized this was partly the reason for my lack in desire when my partner started taking ADHD meds and therefore suddendly was able to stay on top of much more of his tasks without external management.

[bobbel]

Reminder: If its not a clear yes the first time you ask, its a no. Sex is not something you can negociate, youre not trying to haggle prices at a fleamarket.

[RadishTheFool]

Also, if men feel like being exhausted doesn't affect the quality of sex, but their partner does, it might be time to have a look at how connecting and fulfilling that exhausted sex actually is. For both sides.

Because I find a lot of men feel they can still have sex when exhausted, but then just leave all the mental labor of making it an enjoyable and loving experience to the woman.

If making it fun for both sides is too much when you're tired, maybe you're not "always in the mood for sex" after all. You're just in the mood for getting off. Which is not the same thing at all.

[marcydrake]

Sweet Jesus I hope men are listening to you. This is all correct! ✅

[Jessanda]

I wish all husbands could hear this. Thank you for sharing

[cherrycordiaI]

The pressure thing is SUCH a big one. Sometimes it feels like I can't even relax properly around my husband. If he feels stimulated, it has to turn into something. Some hugs, cuddling, dressing after a shower. As soon as he's frisky, he wants to turn it into something... so I'd just stop letting myself 'slip' around him.

[UnexpectedSpanishInquisition]

Usually, it’s because the male becomes more and more childish as the relationship progresses and starts to treat his female partner like his substitute mommy and bangmaid.

Normal, psychologically healthy women are not seggsually attracted to children, even when those children have the physical appearance and biological age of an adult male.

[ninanano]

Been there - my ex tried it by preparing lots of candles and roses etc, but this didn't feel romantic but pressuring me the most. It was also kinda manipulative because we had so many issues that needed to be addressed first and he thought some s*x will everything make better. Unfortunately even the s*x wasn't fun but painful. Now to everyone here: yes I did communicate that in the past. He thought of me as his wifey who does all the housework and doing her marriage duties, nothing romantic about it. We weren't married and I'm happy I got out of this situation. When I broke up his major concern was not having s*x anymore on a regular basis

[eilamariesartre]

It's even worse if they criticize your efforts when you do try and say that you're not as enthusiastic about it and you're just trying the best you can when you're tired and they complain about every single things you do not being good enough.

[situpeutparlemoi]

My first bfs had me thinking I was maybe asexual with how little I wanted sex. But I have discovered that I am near insatiable when I'm in a healthy relationship.

Now, it's like my partners and I have to make choices between sexy times and any number of whatever fun activities we wanna do that aren't sex. Fortunately, we often find ways to do both, and the joy that builds makes finding each other irresistible easy.

[ConstantlyEvolvingDoor]

My husband and I have been working in #2 for a little over a year now (not that we’ve been abstinent that whole time, just that we’ve been working on removing the pressure) and it has done wonders for us. He tells me all the time now that he loves how flirty I am and our intimacy is stronger than ever. And I also know that on those weekends when our son is at my MIL’s and we have the opportunity to be physically intimate, that we don’t have to be and I don’t have to feel any pressure to “do it now because this is our chance.” Like I used to. If it happens it happens and that’s great, but if it doesn’t and we just play stardew together or we work on projects around the house or we harvest from the garden and preserve stuff together, that’s still really fulfilling for both of us.

[justkenzie]

I've been married for 17 years. This is all EXACTLY accurate.

[adamwall]

I’m so glad your channel exists.
I’m in a serious relationship and im proposing in the next 3-4 months.
These shorts and videos are such amazing reminders to me that it is important to show continual effort! I always try get her flowers every other week, ask her how her day was and listen genuinely, tell her she’s so beautiful as much as I can, and try to do random things around her house to try to make her life easier.
That’s what really works well for us:)

[pmargarita]

Omg yes! After I had my twins, my sexual appetite just completely vanished. I’ve explained to my husband that I have been feeling touched out and he said he understood, but he’ll only give me like a day or two and will try to be intimate. I just want to relax at the end of the day and I don’t think he understands that 😢 definitely a tough situation to be in

[prettibaby]

If most men can think like you, be open to feedback, provide a safe space for thrashing out feelings where both parties feel seen and heard, and be determined to be a better man for her, there'd be less breakups and divorces. Yes, relationships are based on mutual respect and understanding, but it's rare for many men I've seen or known to work thru conflicts, it's usually 'my way or the highway'.