What do consultants actually do??

We could have never guessed.

#consultant #goodwork #dantoomey

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[kilubaluba]

This makes me realize I can be a consultant lol I do this all the time as a manager when I’m trying to get new clients we can provide uniforms for

[Robinhartz]

In an absolutely shocking turn of events the real job of a consultant is so that the executives feel like they’re important. They couldn’t possibly listen to their employees about what is going wrong/ what to fix. Only once they’ve spent an enormous amount of money can they feel like they’re important enough to make necessary changes

[deyjaacterius]

I love when consultants deliver some halfassed checkpoint slide that looks like they ate a brochure on PMBOK, puked it up, read it, and then told the client they were going to do Agile — and it’s literally just a fucking green/yellow/red “on track”, “on budget” stoplight chart with no deeper explanation and the C levels in attendance are on their phone the entire time.


Bonus points if they told you they’re going to be “one throat to choke if anything goes wrong” during the pitch meetings, but by the time kickoff rolls around there are like 3 subcontracted firms and another integrator they roped in because “they’re the SMEs for this particular product” and suddenly sweat starts running down your spine and you begin hallucinating the finger-pointing that’s going to start in a year and a half when this thing goes completely off the rails and your company is $5, 000, 000 in the red on the project.

[poorlittlesheep]

I mean, if your product is EXPLODING in kids' faces, I can't imagine how a company can come back from that... 10-15 million to save it doesn't sound all that ridiculous, that is if it can be saved at all.

[parkermccarthy]

The other 2 teams are there to check on the first 2

[adityagamingyt]

I dont know why but this makes me want to be a consultant