What Is the Dumbest Thing You've Ever Heard Someone Say?

▶ Fresh AskReddit Stories: That Was So Stupid, I Was Really Hoping You Were Joking 🔥 2nd channel with exclusive Reddit stories!

[ninomitchell]

Whoever thinks deer change into moose/elk at a certain elevation are nuts. Deer evolve into elk at level 16 and elk to moose at 32, just like pokemon.

[kimberlygabaldon]

I took a friend to an endoscopy appointment. She had to fast, beforehand, and couldn't eat anything after 10:00, the night before her morning appointment.

I picked her up and took her in. Sat in the waiting room for about 45 min. Then they called me back.

She told me that she would have to come back and do it again, because they found food in her stomach. I told her that I thought she had fasted. She said, "I did! I didn't eat anything after 10:00 last night, and then I just had eggs and toast for breakfast." I about died. She was a nurse!!!

The average untrained medical patient understands those instructions. Forrest Gump would have understood those instructions!

[RodrickMarsMoon]

"People will only respect you if you do what they want, whenever they want you to!"
I received this advice very seriously from someone. I'm pretty sure this was a projection, I kinda feel bad for the person who said this to me.

[oldmanfromoc]

The no ice one reminded me of my 50 year old sister saw me putting bottles of water in the freezer, she told me l couldn't freeze water. Wow l explained the whole ice making process!

[maxrobertson]

I’m from Alaska and the crap people ask you is insane. I mostly get asked (by children AND adults) if I have ever seen a wild penguin, then they argue with me when I say they don’t live in Alaska

[rosalindsongsmith]

I know that this probably won’t make it onto a video or anything, but I definitely have several good ones. Firstly, I can’t tell you how many people seem to assume that if you’re blind you’re also deaf. I know that because I’m blind and have had several people assume that I know and use sign language. I’ve also had several people assume that I can’t comment on the Internet because I can’t see so obviously I can’t right. Fun fact. Technology is so advanced now that I’m able to type and either my phone or my laptop will say everything I’m typing out loud. There was one time when my friend and I were shopping at a grocery store. I don’t have any vision, and she’s partially blind. She happened to have her newborn baby with her. Well at one point, this woman came up to us and said something to the effect of, “You are so lucky to have that precious baby with you. He just grabbed your finger and his grip kept you from falling! You have a seeing eye baby! “I wouldn’t have believed this except that I happen to be standing there at the time. It was obvious sadly that the woman who said it was dead serious. Unrelated to the blindness thing, but one time I was at a restaurant and heard some lady tell either a waiter or waitress not to put any ice in the water because she didn’t anyone extra calories because of the ice. It was so ridiculous that my friends and I just started laughing hysterically.

[darkknight]

I once had a friend who didn't know what sex was. Seriously, we were watching a TV Show with a sex scene, and he just had the most confused look on his face as he asked "what is happening?" We all laughed, thinking he was joking. He was not.
Edit: Look, I'm not going to claim know everything about his home life, but I can confirm that he was very sheltered. There are a few other stories, and this is only the one that came to mind.

[jackcarter]

About 5 years ago, I saw my friend and his sister walking down the street outside my house, and we got chatting. It was a very hot day, so I invited them in for a cold drink. When I got the ice cube tray out to ice the drinks, my friend's sister said "How do you cut the ice into such smooth cubes to fit in the tray?". Thinking she was joking, I laughed. But she was dead serious. So I said, in disbelief that I was actually having to explain this to a grown adult, "You pour liquid water into the tray and then freeze it". She looked at me like I was speaking an alien language. 10 minutes of agonised explanation later, the truth finally comes out. This woman, in her mid 20s, has absolutely no idea that ice is, in fact, frozen water!

[loserwithabong]

Not said directly towards me, but overheard

A girl in my friends science class was arguing with the teacher about how using brail is offensive and how deaf people aren’t disabled. Like she fully believed this. And was getting so mad she was crying and everyone was just sitting there silently. Lmfaooo

[stanford-nfjk]

In ninth grade health class a guy said to the teacher, “Why do abortions even exist? If women don’t want to get pregnant, all they have to do is pee out the sperm!” 🤦🏻‍♂️

[ladymorrigan]

I had to explain to a grown woman and her husband that in fact not all chickens lay eggs. It’s only the hens that lay eggs and roosters do not. They seemed sheepishly unsure & glad of the explanation.

[myufostory]

I'm an amateur astronomer. When I was growing up, I was looking at Mars through my telescope with my mom, and I commented about wondering what the stars would look like from Mars.

She commented, "You mean, Mars has stars too?"

[xxscribbledragonxx]

We were learning about consent at the ripe age of 16 and some kid said "what if they say no but you really really want it, " he wasnt joking

[codybailey]

Pulled a guy over for running a bright light tbar on the highway. During the stop, he said he needed it because his high beams weren't bright enough. I told him to get new bulbs. Then dude straight up said it was probably because one of the lights were low on fluid. I started laughing, thinking he was joking. Dude was serious. He then pointed out the condensation on the inside of one of his headlights. I td him what it was, and that he needed new headlights. That, or a restoration kit. Freaking killed me.

[keels]

13:16 I was forced to eat a Belgian waffle and a steak with only a spork awhile back and can confirm (for a different reason) that they are the devil's utensil

[LovelyCinccino]

..Ohh the Cards Against Humanity story brings back that traumatizing memory of when I played with my parents and their friends..And of course, someone made the mistake of looking up what ‘Two Girls, One Cup’ was..

[alexanderwelshwelsh]

A kid in my year 10 biology class asked if cows were predators

I say that forgetting the teacher of that class the previous year said she knew someone that had a bathtub that could cure cancer but couldnt use it because they were being threatened by the government of the isle of wight
So thatd probably be the dumbest thing to come out of that school

[kalistasanders]

I was playing pool with this guy one day and I was telling him that I was from Ohio. And he asked me where that was in Illinois. Yeah stopped talking to him over that. Can't have a conversation with someone (in their late 20's) that doesn't know Ohio is a state 🤦

[JonPITBZN]

"Something with an A and looks German."

I was not able to guess just from that. I know what Auschwitz is but that wasn't enough of a hint for me to guess it.

[chasefrost]

4:26
Barbarianna "It's the dinosaur age"
Kung Fury "That explains the laser raptors"