Am I Responsible For How Other People Feel? - Teal Swan

Am I responsible for how other people feel? There are a couple answers to this question and many of them relate to our choice in our relationships. Some people take too much responsibility for how others feel, others take no responsibility at all. Teal explains that our responsibility is a choice and that we need to learn how to choose want we want rather than be led by what we think is right or wrong.

Video References:

And Consciousness: 15:08

Incompatibility: 16:20

Attunement, The Key to a Good Relationship: 17:24

What kind of supportive are you? :19:35

Meet Your Needs: 27:52

Dependence Vs. Independence: 27:54

Responsibility (Why, When and How to Take It): 29:23

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👉 Who Is Teal Swan?

Teal Swan is a New Thought Leader and a Bestselling Author who is an expert in human development and relationships. She has over a decade of experience working with people of all walks of life with a mission to reduce human suffering.

Today, she’s also become an International Speaker, having facilitated retreats and life changing workshops in large venues worldwide. Teal was ranked 15th on The Watkins Most Spiritually Influential Living People in 2023.

👉 Follow Teal Swan:
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[lakehairdontcare]

I finally found someone who could articulate everything I’ve ever felt. Thank God for you and coming into this platform. I feel connected to you, it’s in the eyes, I can see it. Everything has started to fit into place. You are an extraordinary teacher. God bless.

[HugBunnies]

You know, usually watching these videos hurts my ego. But this time, I think it's more a confirmation for my progression so far. I'm proud of myself. Thanks, Teal.

[Piecesoftheshadow]

You ARE responsible for how people feel if you actively treat them like crap or are emotionally abusive or don’t allow others to speak or feel, and listen and be open. To say you’re not responsible at all gives people the excuse to treat others however they want to. Drives me crazy when people do that. It’s very apathetic and selfish. But you’re not responsible for others feelings in that it’s not your job to fulfil others voids if they expect you to or if they expect you to make them happy, like in the way some parents make their kids feel responsible for their parents happiness. Great video.

[jasminehull]

This came at the perfect time. 25 and I'm still dealing with being "responsible" for other's emotions all the time.

[silje]

Wow I didn't realise that I take responsibility for how people feel, and that it's part of the reason why I care so much what people think of me.

[abebber]

I did Sadhguru's online class a year ago. In it, he talks about how if two people start fist fighting, is it your responsibility to break up and try to stop the fight? It is no one's but yet someone will take it as their responsibility to and try to stop it. If you see a piece of trash on the ground, who should be the one responsible for picking it up and throwing it away? We have no way of knowing how the trash got there, it could have been blown by a tornado several years ago or was blown by the wind from the dump itself. Whoever chooses to pick it up is "responsible" for picking it up. No one is required to take responsibility for anything (the earth, your room/house, yourself, animals, your relationships to other people) but yet I think the best possible life we can create is by taking as much responsibility as we can for the things that are within our power.

[deerinheadlights]

I am a therapist and only six minutes into the video. I truly appreciate you Teal. Thank you for your wisdom making the world a better place. Thank you for the peace you bestow on me.

[raiderlove]

I was brought up to think and believe that I was responsible for how others feel. It has messed me up my whole life in that I felt it was my responsibility to make a loved one feel better about themselves at the risk of my own mental and emotional health.

[billbirkett]

For a while I thought I was an empath, and now I realize that I am a recovering co-dependent. I dealt with severe enmeshment trauma in childhood with having to be forced to be my mother's therapist in the wake of my father not taking emotional responsibility for my mother. So I ended up being a sort of 'surrogate husband', and it was such a painful thing to go through that I disconnected from not only my own needs, but also my own entire sense of ego and personal power. If I showed care towards my own goals, I faced negative backlash from my mother, accusing me of 'not needing her' anymore and 'growing up too fast'. As I got older, I became afraid of forging my own path and taking action without first checking with other people.

[Nancyox]

When I think about the dynamics between me and my three older sisters and our mother...all of this make SO much sense. A single mother trying to be responsible for the feelings of 4 daughters. Four daughters feeling responsible for how their mother and other sisters feel and then each reacting differently to that feeling of responsibility. Everyone trying and failing to be self-sufficient and creating a climate where it's not okay to need attention. All of the dysfunctional coping mechanisms. It's no wonder we grew so far apart. We had no idea how to be there for each other. We couldn't even accept ourselves, let alone each other.

[sbeast]

Be compassionate, but don't enable,
Speak the truth; don't tell a fable,
The secret to everything—responsibility,
And then you will achieve invulnerability.

[insight]

Teal is underrated as fuck. Her messages are so insightful yet she's only at half a million subs. So many people actually need to know this so that we can function in harmony as a society.

[Nina_Kowsari]

oh i love that last bit, for people like myself who have abandonment and take too much responsibility in relationships and are often match to people with enmeshment who don't want any responsibility in relationships- for us it is definitely about figuring out what responsibility to let go of. you cannot inspire someone who doesn't want to do their 50%. your responsibility is to yourself and to extricate yourself from those relationships.

[itsaplantlife]

If I'm speaking from alignment and know I'm not being an asshole, when people think I'm being one, it really shows where their wounds are. I know I'm in a dysfunctional relationship. I'd enjoy meeting their wounds when they're not lashing out, rather speaking to me from a vulnerable honesty. Until I'm met from that place when I'm giving enough of my loved-on wounds, I hold strong on not being responsible for their butthurtness. I've grown. They can grow. I'd love to grow more with them instead of outside of them.

[dancinglightsamv]

I completely feel the part about taking all the responsibility and the option of being empowered when you let that go. From a young age I was blamed for my 'bad' behavior and how it made other people feel. Even when I said something neutral or a matter-of-fact, they still punished me for... something? Even back then, they felt angry and I always felt like I made them feel that way. Later I was blamed for worse things, there's a lot of responsibility on my shoulders about our family, our house and finances, their happiness etc. and all that started when I was a little child who didn't understand anything about money and other grown-up things yet. They even say that I'm responsible for everything directly to my face. If you think you're responsible for bad things from such a young age, you start to think YOU ARE the bad thing.

[racheldebner]

Wow, you are gifted with a high EQ! I'm impressed! You are so articulate!

[kurogogyou]

Teal, I love you. You have a way to verbalize the things everyone feels, that they didn't already know how to verbalize themselves. I feel like you've helped me know myself in ways that would have been nearly impossible to know by myself. Thank you!

[Ben_D.]

I love that Teal always covers all of the bases when she does these. Its not just something she threw together overnight. Lots of background and lots of permutations. And always personal and vulnerable. So well done. And its just EVERY time.

[RaeLarz]

This video is so empowering, for now I realize I have a freedom of choice dependent on individual circumstances / people. It makes me want to find my partner who wants to take responsibility for things I don't and visa versa. Or things we agree to take responsibility for. This approach is revolutionary yet so simple. Thank you, Teal Swan <3

[gloriam]

Interesting, I used to diminish myself for others. I was afraid to lose people. I suffered just to keep them, even though I was the one who wasnt satisfied with relationship. I took me lot of courage to stand up for myself. They never gave as much as I did. So... why should I feel sorry for them, if they never asked how I really felt...