Girl Chat: How Long Should a Couple Wait Before Cohabiting?

How long should couple waiting before moving in together? This is the topic at the Girl Chat table. Watch, then share your answer in the comments.

[MajesticMyronn]

Jeannie flipped her bangs... I am completely 💀!!! She's deserves a REAL award lol

[itsjackson]

"I was trying to keep my kitty in it's little pocket." I'm crying. Gosh I love Jeannie.

[tbaby]

I completely agree with Jeannie. Before you live with someone, everyone is on their best behavior. You don't really know someone until you live with them. I think that's the case whether it's a spouse, boyfriend, or best friend.

[WifeandWifeTV]

I remember having this conversation in a grad school Sociology class about the statistics of co-habitating and divorce rates. People who don't cohabitate before marriage are generally more conservative with their views on marriage and divorce - making it less likely that they would consider divorce due to religious reasons, etc; whereas, people who choose to co-habitate before marriage tend to be more liberal in their views of marriage and divorce, making it more likely that they might consider and file for divorce more quickly.

[lisax]

My parents were dating for about a year before they moved in together and then lived together for 5 years before they got married. They have been married for 23 years and I don't think living situations have much to do with it. It's all about the couple

[Kim-uicv]

I agree with Tamera completely. Personally I don't want to live with any man until he puts a ring on my finger.... Sometimes men get too comfortable and expect you to do "wifely" things just because your living with them. I'm not giving away those perks until it's official.

[TheCultureCounselor]

I may be waaaay too analytical but I just cringe when I hear people say 'statistics' or 'research/a study has shown'..
I'm always left wondering what that means. Where was this research conducted, how big was the sample? Which country? Which culture, which age group/generation, socio-economic status. All these things affect the results. 😕

[bosslady]

"You never lived with a man before???" As if that's the norm...

[TheElysian]

I think it's super cool to see so many people want to wait until marriage to live together!

[a.williams]

To comment on that last bit Tamera said, yes people who live together before marriage do have higher divorce rates. That is mostly because those who choose to live together before marriage tend to have less traditional views on marriage and divorce. So they are more likely to divorce if things don't work out.

[TheTarotQueen]

Personally, I think it’s good to know wether you can stand each other living together BEFORE getting married to prevent getting divorced.

[jyn]

My sister didn't move out until she was married. During their engagement they did a lot of sleepovers though. After they were married, they bought a house together and that's when they learned A LOT about each other. Jeannie is right. Sleepovers isn't the same as actually living together.

[ThandsTV]

my opinion: do whatever u want. Move in after a day if you want, it's your life.

[LoveLove-bblv]

I never moved in with my husband until we were married. I refuse to be doing any wifey duties and I ain't your wife. Because then you catch yourself in a situation like Adrienne you acting like wifey for 6 years, then he shoves a box of carrots in your face as a proposal. Then 2 months later its a wrap! Chile please, like my momma said until he is I DO you DON'T. Time is too precious for that mess.

[TheChildfreeCurlyGirl]

Lived together for 3 years before we got married. I didn't want to get married initially. I honestly don't understand people's obsession with marriage! Trust me people, NOTHING changes after you get married. If you were a happy couple before, you will remain a happy couple after marriage and if you were an unhappy couple...well you know the ending to this one.
I think society bases women's worth on whether or not she's married. That's archaic. I would have happily stayed common-law.
Here's a little trick, do what's best for you as a couple. You don't have to get married and you definitely don't have to have kids. Stop letting society dictate how you live your life.

[BeauTCravez]

My husband and I did not live together literally until after we got married! Best decision we made because we had to learn and explore and accept our differences. Its made us stronger and i wouldnt change it for anything! Because we waited i feel like there was a special blessing on our home.

[LissyHTX]

Started dating my boyfriend in 2011
Moved in summer of 2015
Engaged December 2016
Married summer of 2017
Through the years our conversations get deeper and more meaningful, the experiences we share hold more value to us. Really nothing changed except my last name

[markito]

I stopped listening after Jeannie flipped up her clip on bang. I'm shook for centuries. 🤣

[alyssaassyla]

I'm 21 and moved in with my boyfriend. We're both students and it was better for both of us to split rent at a place next to our university. Before, we were both living farther from campus and paying more in rent. After 10 months I have no regrets. Since we both have demanding majors it's hard to find time to spend together. I love being able to get home from class and having time in the evening to cook a homemade meal with someone I love

[kathy]

I'm 22, and I'm in my first relationship. I don't ever plan on "co-habiting". I don't wanna be living with "boyfriends". I don't get people that say "well, don't you want to know how he is before you marry him blah blah blah" NO. That's so dumb to base me marrying someone just by how they live. If I'm ever gonna live with a man, it will be my husband. Plus, once you get married, you're supposed to look forward to living together, so what's there to look forward to when you're already past that step?