Why You Should Assume Good Intent | Mel Robbins

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When they don't text you back or they cut you off in traffic...what do you think about people? The power of assuming GOOD intentions rather than malice can improve your experiences in a massive way. In this video, I tell you how.

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[laurieparis]

I'm so glad to hear someone talk about this. 3 inter-related rules I live by : Assume good intent until proven otherwise... and then back out carefully, walk away with dignity, if true harm is intended. Don't take things personally, bc you're simply not that important. 😂 If you have a problem with someone, go to them directly, ask for elaboration without pre- judgment. If more of us practiced this daily, the world would be a far saner place.

[stephaniemoran]

I am the worst for not responding to people but now I see that I must do better. Thank you Mel

[PracticalInspiration]

This was fantastic, was literally discussing this yesterday with people. Many people don't have intent to hurt or harm you in most cases, but we jump to conclusions, which is worse for us more than anyone. Wonderful video

[alohamilkyway]

This is a great message. The world doesn't revolve around me and there are things that are not in my control. Assuming good content makes it easier to accept things as they are without being disappointed.

[rahul]

Love you mel, thanks for the amazing job

[danield]

there is a phrase in spain that says "Piensa mal y acertarás" which translates to something like "think paranoid (in a negative way) and you will be right"

[Abellephoto]

I love this! I never (rarely is more accurate) assume someone is ill-intentioned. This has significantly improved my life. More often than not, people, just like myself, are forgetful, not thorough, not attentive to detail, distracted, forgetful, not great with words, etc. They didn't necessarily have the intention to hurt someone from the get go! The timing of this video in my life is perfect! Thank you.

[briliantbg]

I really like this advice. A friend of mine shared her philosophy (that i like a lot) with me long time ago and it is - ask once, apologize once and say Thank you, once.

[Addvaluegroup]

I believe this message is more about controlling your response to a situation you as bad. Focusing on the good is always good. Never go down a path of negativity, which allows your mind to stay focus on where YOU want to go. Thanks for sharing.

It's so assuring to know that a successful person like you still encounters mis-communication at work. I've been recently caught up in a mini-drama at work, which I didn't have any bad intentions but ppl still assumed that I deliberately wanted to cause harm. I tried to act professionally and explain things via emails. But there's no response. There was even a heated quarrel at work about me when I was not there. I felt terrible and wanted to quit the job. Thank you for this amazing video.

[Missmary]

Another thing is that 99% of the times, there is no intent.Yes, a friend might see your text and purposefully ignore it because he's watching a movie or sth, but it doesn't mean that he hates you and you're boring.It's just neutral.

[ahoardersheart]

Actually, I have the opposite problem. I believe in the good of everyone...that everyone has a good intention. That has lend to people taking advantage of me. I know I tend to be naive or too trusting...but there’s people who have done wonderful caring things for me! I guess it’s all about balance!

[AdrianaGirdler]

LOVE this! Yes, we get hung up on such small things but so often people truly DO have the best intentions. We are all humans and we all make simple mistakes and most people don't wake up with the intention to go out and hurt others - there are simply misunderstandings and miscommunications along the way. Cheers!

[ursurada]

This is a great point of view Mel! Thank you for your advice!
I would still end relationships with people who do not respond to me to a message that clearly needs a response. It is very disrespectful.

[nikkabeto]

Everytime I feel not okay.. especially from work...I always used to watch all your encouraging videos ..and it makes me stress free... thanks for your help of giving an advice

[unconditionallymissie]

I’ve been practicing this skill for about 2 years now and it gave me a different perspective and the way I feel now versus before is magical!

[umeasiegbuchioma]

Oh my God! Mel Robbins, I want you to know today that you are a life changer. Your videos are very impactful, mind-blowing and heart stopping, thank you for sharing. I am your number one fan, I love you. My name is Chioma from Nigeria.

[shelleybloomfield]

We just had a big move to new digs at work. It's been so stressful. "Grace" is the word we're using. I also change the story narrative in my head. "Maybe the cat puked in their shoes before work." or "Maybe they've been sick and have a Nyquil hangover and their brain is a little scrambled." Sometimes I even amuse myself with the stories I make up. But the word of the moment for us is "grace". How hard is it to give people a little grace sometimes?

[TahiLalatSeokmin]

Being surrounded by people with negative thoughts who love to assume bad about others actually made me realised sooner that to make them stop spoiling your day, you'll have to be the one to instigate good intents on them. Did this once too many times and it automatically instilled in my own attitude. Although that automatically disappeared when I'm driving... which something I'll need to fix. Thanks for this vid, and I'll surely share this with those people 🙂

[indianbell]

Spot on today! Thank you, I was getting stressed out over being punctual at a job requests & arrived way early (my good intent) so I could have everything set up early. Then they were later than I expected & she made the comment "Wow! You were really early, hope I don't have to pay for your time for that." There was another activity too that was going on, I cleaned their area as well & they signed my time sheet too I informed her...but I've been wrecking my emotions since her comment thinking I did wrong. Thank you, I was just doing my best.😊 You inspire me so much!