Mom Says Daughter Is Harsh Claiming Her Brother Uses Asperger’s as a Crutch

Angela claims that her brother is faking his Asperger diagnosis and is using it as a crutch, her mother Rosanna thinks Angela is being really harsh. Rosanna shares Dan was diagnosed late and explains that her son Dan went off to college and came home claiming that he didn’t like to be touched.

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[cthulucalamari]

I was diagnosed with autism (Asperger's) just last year. I'm 31 now. I've spent my life fighting and hiding issues I've had with being touched, or problems with sounds and textures, and let's not even get into the social interaction problems. People who are autistic, but never get that early diagnosis, do this thing called masking. You basically pretend to not have the problems you do have, in order to fit in and function as normally as possible in society, especially after you've been called out on your "weirdness", or bullied for it. You basically become someone you're not. I found that when I received my diagnosis finally, I was able to stop masking and finally let out the person I truly am. Autism is a part of my personality, so to speak. It's actually been useful to me in a lot of ways, and I'm now able to free that part of myself without the extra anxiety of worrying about whether or not people will find me weird, or whatever, just because I know now that there's a reason for why I am the way I am to begin with, and have accepted that part of myself. If I don't want to be touched, or I'm feeling extreme anxiety about being around others, or someone asks me why I'm not looking them in the eye, or asks me why I'm stimming, or there's something causing a painful sound, etc.- I just tell them what's going on. It does frustrate others that I'm "making it a thing", but it is "a thing", and I deserve the same courtesy as any neurotypical person. My point is that I think that's probably what's going on here. He masked issues he didn't know were actually symptoms until he found out why he is the way he is, and his sister saying he's using it as a crutch is a bit frustrating to me, seeing as how I'm in a similar situation. I do have a life, husband, and kids, but it's still something that I struggle with constantly and that I wish more people understood and respected. The fact that she's even reacting to it this way shows she is extremely uneducated when it comes to autism. Yes, he can overcome and find ways to live a good life with these problems, but recognition is something important in a situation like this. Don't make light of another person's problems just because you don't understand them yourself.

[alifmuhammadchicago]

As someone who is surrounded by some of these tests, I can tell you that some people absolutely do self-diagnose WebMD-style and just flare their symptoms up to get the diagnosis. Having said that, I think it is probably better to ask, "Does the brother think that the diagnosis is a *limitation* that isn't worth trying to overcome?" That would have been a far more comprehensive conversation.
Edit: flaring the symptoms up isn't always intentional.

[dreamlessdemand]

as an autistic person myself and even though i know all autistic people are different, this is my theory/personal opinion: it’s called ‘masking’. before her brother was diagnosed, he hid/masked his symptoms the best that he could. a big reason why so many people are diagnosed later in life is because they mask their symptoms well as a child/teen. after the diagnosis, her brother understood himself more and felt like he could finally ‘be himself’, so he stopped masking. some family members do not like or know how to handle this ‘new’ person after the diagnosis because they are not used to it. her brother has always been autistic, he just doesn’t hide the symptoms as much anymore and feels more comfortable in his own skin.

[emilyroberts]

Okay, as somebody who is professionally diagnosed (confirmed by two separate doctors) with level 2/moderate autism, persistent depressive disorder with major depressive episodes, generalized anxiety disorder and PTSD, it doesn't matter to me whether this kid has Asperger's or not; he's lazy and needs a good kick in the pants. I hate people touching me (and have my whole life, confirmed by my family) as well as a whole host of other sensory issues, but I had a job by the time I was eighteen. I've been living on my own since I was 24, and even though it's a struggle, I make the effort to reach out for help so I can keep my independence. If he really did spontaneously develop an aversion to physical touch after college, that might be some kind of weird sensory processing disorder (never heard of them developing later in life; most people are born with it) but it is not autism. Autism symptoms can be spotted from childhood, even if the parent doesn't understand at the time that what they're seeing is autism. I agree with the sister, make him get a job or kick him out, lazy freeloader.

[WillShackAttack]

Well shit, I'm on the other side of this coin.
My whole family thinks I have Asperger's and I think it's bullshit!

[sallesa]

Come for me LMAOO.. but I think Avery is being to Too sensitive and defensive. She said how she felt and I can’t blame her

[chestrockwell]

I believe the girl..I’m a divorced 40 year old who just started dating a lady who’s 17 year old son is fuxking faking aspergers..he gets to eat McDonald’s and pizza whenever he wants..he has no responsibility and he manipulates her..he’s simply a pussy and his parents feed into it..he turns normal whenever he wants but when he is faking he stares me down and smirks when he’s manipulating..aspergers is easily faked