HP Internet Advisor: $20,000 Monster 486 Laptop

Say hello to the Hewlett Packard J2300 series protocol analyzer! It's heavy, loud, and has a 100MHz 486DX4. What more could you want in a computer! Except maybe a sense of practicality, haha.

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● Music used in order of appearance:
Suits & Neckties 1, Not That Serious 3, Rotations 2

[elroyscout]

"It's just a 90's computer at heart"
*Sound of Helicarrier taking off

[VampLovr]

This makes me think of the “lappy 486” from homestarrunner so much.
“WEIGHING AT A CONVENIENT 47 POUNDS!”

“⚠️5-minute battery life”

“ -several- *COLOR MONITOR!”*

“Charges in 5-7 business days”

[RedTopProductions]

Howdy there! I work at Hewlett Packard Enterprise (the enterprise-side of the 2015 company split, consisting primarily of PPS becoming HP Inc. (HPI) and EG becoming Hewlett Packard Enterprise (HPE)), and our team manages some of the biggest data centers in the company! Our lab supports some absolutely ancient server/data center technologies (still alive!) purely for customer contract support purposes... some back from the Compaq merger days and before! It's kinda odd seeing 20 year old equipment sitting next to Gen 10 servers which are exponentially more powerful and energy efficient. If you're ever in the Fort Collins area, hit me up for a tour of how far HP has come since this early workstation laptop!

[hevad]

You can go to your local Starbucks with it. I'd like to see the faces of the people.

[sirpp]

The friggin jet engine noise when it turns on. Titilating.

[tekgott]

Worked at an ISP in 1996-2000 and we had 4 of these!

[joshsamuelson]

It's a t1 network analyzer. I never worked with one but worked with other similar pieces of equipment. Long story short it can perform bit error rate testing on the entire t1 line down to the ds0 level along with acting as a monitor for the different protocols used in network communications. Speed tests, stress tests, and probably a few others I am forgetting. You don't want the long version. lol

[newagederpderp]

LGR: Gets a specialized heavy-duty 20k machine used for network diagnostics and other specialized work
Also LGR: *d o o m*

[llLorenzoll]

HOLY SHIT THAT MOUSE IS SO CUTE IT'S THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!

[hoangtran]

nothing says "i love collecting vintage computer hardware but i also live in the present" than having a 1080ti box and a soundblaster box in the same frame

[pandaphil]

And here I thought a computer with lots of blinky lights was only something you saw in 60's tv shows.

[RavenDayton]

This thing weighs 20 pounds you do not want this thing in your lap

Me with my 19 pound cat in my lap: What?

[TonyFleetwood]

they should have called it "the lap crusher 20, 000"

[GROENAASMusic]

With so many inputs, I'm actually surprised it doesn't have USB input.
Many advanced PC's from 1996 and later actually did have a USB input after all.

[dia]

That pop-out mouse idea made someone very rich... but all I can do is laugh at how silly that looks. :P

[tpkirkp]

This brings back memories. I had one I used when I worked for Pacific Bell in Concord, CA. I was the chronics tech support for frame relay. It was a fun time b4 SBC/AT&T.
I retired 1/11/08 after 38 yrs in the telco. I couldn't take any more of AT&T's BS. Thanks for showing this rig.
Cheers.

[Builder]

It's a telecommunications test set to test digital telco lines up to a T1 level, a T- Bird or Firebird test set built into a a laptop style case. Most likely with with different protocol analyzer software. Although 20 years old it would work just fine testing today's telco lines.

[bernik]

This is not a laptop!

Its a piece of networking test gear that has a built in computer. Agilent and now Keysight still make things like this today. A lot of high end test equipment like osciloscopes, spectrum analyzers, network analyzers and other specialised test quipment runs a normal x86 PC inside running windows 7. This high end equipment does not sell in high volumes as only so many people in the world need such a thing so using windows makes it faster to develop software for it, but they all still cost over 10 grand new.

Its all the specialized test and measurement hardware that makes this thing cost 20 grand, not the glued on computer part.

[mazimadu]

Looks cool, but does it have a TURBO BUTTON?

[LazerLord]

That form factor actually looks pretty sweet for a LAN party 'desk top' computer. Way easier to lug around than a full desktop and monitor.