Why Families in Europe Are Sending Elderly Relatives To Care Homes in Thailand

While Thailand has long been a popular tourist destination, in recent years Westerners have also been flocking there for an entirely different reason: assisted living and end of life care.

‘The care system in Europe is not working anymore, and it's going to be a big, big problem,’ says Martin Woodley, who opened a care facility in Thailand in 2003, after his father took his own life because he couldn't cope with his wife's dementia. Eileen Chubb, a former carer in the UK, isn't surprised people are looking for alternatives. She now investigates abuses in UK care homes and has seen plenty of horror stories: ‘People were left with bedsores to the bone and when you walked onto the unit you could smell dead flesh.’ In these Thai resorts, patients are cared for 24/7. Looking after your elders is a vital responsibility in Thai culture, but even there things are changing. One Thai woman, for example, says she won't rely on her sons in her old age: ‘I'm not sure who will take care of us’.

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Al Jazeera – Ref. 7969

[isakbonaventura]

An old friend of mine once said: "How come that one mother can take care of 7 children but 7 children can't take care of one mother?".

[deliagarcia]

I'm a physician and my sister is a nurse. My Mother died at the age of 88 and suffered from dementia the last 3 to 4 years of her life. My sister and I took turns caring for her in our own homes, but she begged to live in her own. So, our parish priest helped me find a wonderful immigrant couple in their 60's to move into my Mom's house until she died of a stroke. They treated her like family, and Mom was so happy. We paid them a monthly salary, and when Mom passed away, I gave them my portion of the proceeds of the house, so they were able to sell their home and live in my Mom's home debt free. They were the kindest people and a godsend!

[wallstreethamster]

My mother looked after me in the beginning of my looked after her in the last years of her life.

[glondikeink]

My grandmother had dementia in her late 80s. When she was not able to take care of herself anymore, my mom and her sister took turns having her at their homes for a month- periods. It was exhausting. My grandmother went to sleep at 7 pm and took walks around the house at 3 am as she could not sleep anymore. Obviously, my mom could not sleep either as she was worried grandma could hurt herself or set the house on fire. Another thing was that she followed my mom everywhere demanding to go home and arguing for hours. So when you finally felt she understands why she cannot go home, in 30 minutes she forgot all about it and the arguments started all over again. My mother started having very high heart rate and had to start taking medication. Half a year later, she picked up a phone and arranged a good care home for my grandma in the same town with 24/7 professional care. My grandma was taken care of, she had a family member visiting every day. She still wanted to go home, but my mom did not go crazy and could finally get some sleep and her health in order. It is easy to criticise if you never went through it.

[maryhidalgo]

Same here. I am Mexican we take care of our own. I took care of my mother round the clock for 5 years after she became ill, sadly she passed 2 years ago. I now take care of my 92 year old father and I will do so until the good lords takes him home...It was an honor and a blessing to do so with my mother and its so with my amazing father.

[herculean]

I'm gonna want to have my mom and dad with me no matter their age, they've fed me, showered me, helped me walk when I was younger. The best I can do is the same when they get older.

[livenow]

In Africa, we stay with and take care of our elderly. Its fun to have them around. There is also more interaction between them, their children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

[karenelliott]

I have muscular dystrophy and can no longer walk so I needed assistance with ambulating. I looked at American nursing homes. The good ones were extravagant charging a fortune. Some even required huge down payment to. The places I could afford were overcrowded and understaffed. I moved to a care home in Colombia. The staffing ratios are amazing. I basically have what amounts to a studio apartment. A hospital bed, oxygen, a stirring area, a fridge in a small kitchen, a beautiful large patio. I am so happy here.

[azrulsaleh]

My mom isn't going anywhere. She's staying with me.

[georgiamanu]

I used to work in a nursing home it was incredibly depressing. This place is literally paradise compare to the soul sucking place I was working at.

[virsapiensfortisest]

I remember talking to a woman from Africa who immigrated to the US a few days prior. I asked her what things she found odd about America. She thought about for a bit then answered, “Two things: daycares and elderly homes- where I am from the elders look after the children. The children keep their bodies and minds strong while the elders teach the children. It’s a perfect system. I don’t know why this is not done here’. I’ve never forgotten her words. Our country is so broken.

[rosanapulido]

Im proud to be filipino we take care of our elders to their last breath.

[carolynsole]

The lady who moved to Thailand to be with her husband, showed true love, made me cry x

[thesilentkiller]

So sad Westerners can keep dogs cats etc but not their parents.

[judyblueeyes]

I am crying this is so beautiful. As a retired nurse I have seen the horrors of the American long term care centers. We kept both parents at home till they passed. There is something terribly wrong with how we treat the helpless elderly. Thank God there are places like these.

[antoanetaslavescu]

My mother RIP stayed with me until the last moment. She was 97.

[greysilverback]

Nothing wrong with going to Thailand for proper care, but I think their spouses should live there as well. Seems crazy to drop off a loved one 10, 000 miles away.

[rio]

"I can't remember to remember..." God, that hit me hard.

[evapeace]

I took care of my granddaddy when he had stage 4 cancer and when he passed I had peace because I know I did right by him! 🙏🏾

[Namoari]

This is not paradise but...it’s much much better than the long term cares in the west, especially during the pandemic....shortages of staffs, rising costs, abusive system, neglected...