Wife Left Our Family For Her Affair Partner & Now Says She Wants To Fix Things A Year Later...

Wife Left Our Family For Her Affair Partner & Now Says She Wants To Fix Things A Year Later...

0:00 - My (49M) wife (48F) left the family for her affair partner a year ago but now she says she wants to fix things
6:20 - Cheating spouse doesn't want to try to save our marriage, but also doesn't want to leave. Is this normal?

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► Title: Wife Left Our Family For Her Affair Partner & Now Says She Wants To Fix Things A Year Later...
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[Germania]

First story: why would he want to go back with such a shallow woman? She told him she leaves him because the other guy is more "interesting" and that she "regrets" having a child with him (that's horrible). She doesn't want to go back because she loves him, just because the AP "lied to her" and she needs financial security. Why is it even a question here?

[fcold]

1. Say no. Her "losing it" is really not your problem anymore. She made her choice, that her choice was a bad one is also not your problem.

[kirbycairo]

Wow, that's brutal. If she had been civil and cared for the son from the beginning that would be one thing. After all, people sometimes struggle with their life choices etc. But to just leave and institute NC with the husband AND son is just crazy.

[mgaus]

Unpopular opinion: breaking marriage vows means forfeiting your life to the wronged partner.

[gospelelvis]

A mom who gives up on her kids is way worse than a cheating wife, in my book.

[misterabsurd]

Lines like "he was everything that I wasn't" baffle me. If you like everything that OP is not then why would you even consider let alone marry him?

[adolfoarancesjr]

She abandoned her family for her AP, now that the AP dropped her, she comes crawling on four to be family again, man, she could easily return to her old ways if she finds another guy who could gives her the tingle, I say don't ever take her back but it's your life and your son's life, you decide what's best and think what she puts you through....

[GLoLChibs]

Story 1- Lololol no. Leave that harlot on the street. His son has been traumatized enough and she's made it clear she regrets having him. If for no other reason OP needs to keep her away for sons sake.

[lappesjl]

If you can "fall out of love" you were never 'in love' in the first place.

[stevec]

Story #1: Same old story, wife/girlfriend has affair with an "amazing man", lies to husband/boyfriend, decides to leave him, AP leaves her and she wants back with husband/boyfriend telling him she made a big mistake or suffered from a temporary mental/emotional delusion.

Sometimes I wonder if women like this are "Self Medicating" themselves by having an affair...

[ryzukumagawa]

Tell her that there is nothing left to fix it simply does not exist any longer

[BW]

Story 1: Grow a backbone. Your only goal should be get to this toxic being out of your life. She harmed your child. What would you do if some stranger did that? Would you have them live with you, continue being around your children, trust them, etc., etc. No, you tell them to get out of your life and then you make them. With a child that is more difficult, but you need to.
1. See you lawyer. Do not stop the divorce.
2. Do not talk to her. Block her. Have you lawyer send a cease and desist order and use a friend or family member as an emergency contact and for any visitation in the separation agreement.
3. Have your lawyer start adding pressure -- if she is unemployed ask for child support (healthcare, full therapy costs, etc. plus interest), ask for a home inspection for visitation, amend the visitation to include AP can't be around since he is abusive, possibly even ask for supervised or no visits, etc. If not in the agreement, ask for full custody.
4. Document everything. Every time she didn't visit the child, every birthday, school play, etc. Ask the therapist for a letter outlining the abuse. Any report cards, talks with teachers, friends, any family, etc. Ask for letters from her employer. Have your lawyer contact OBS and offer to share information about the affair.
5. Tell any family (especially hers) or friends who even suggest not continuing the divorce or staying with her to stay out of it until the divorce if finalized. If they don't block them and limit their contact with your son.
6. Have a friend or good family member stay with you and the kid. Both to keep her away, as a witness, as moral support, and to keep an eye on your son and you. Watch for counter claims of abuse, neglect, poisoning the kid, etc.
7. As much as you can, spent quality time with your son. Lots of inexpensive activities.
8. See a therapist yourself (and good friends/family).
9. Let your boss know.

Your goal should be to get her out of your life and limit as much as possible with your son. After the divorce, assuming you get primary custody... consider moving -- especially is she isn't economically able to.

[alex.a]

A victim of his lie holy she belongs to the multiverse of madness

[robertcromwell]

Story 1: Aside from co-parenting Have nothing to do with your soon to be EX. File for divorce now.
She is just back for support from you and a place to stay. She will pull this again in the future. Do not be manipulated by her threats of losing it, self harm, etc.
She is NOT a victim, you and your son are. Protect your son divorce her. Bring up the child abandonment in the divorce for full custody.

[andrewwiller]

" How do I do ?" After all she's done to you
Are you nuts ???? No wonder she's disrespecting you...

[beta-male]

Don't be second best, she left, there is no going back, move on. This is. Her choice not your's, she cheated and left the marriage, not you. She no 💯%what she did, leave, bye bye bye.

[terrylong]

S1..question..What do I do or I dont know what to do..Its 'clear what has to be done. She started the divorce, you will continue with the divorce. She left you for AP. She abandoned her child. No matter what lies the AP said, she left you and her marriage and her family. She will do it again when something shinny comes along.

[cyborgbabyarms]

She doesn’t love you. She just doesn’t want to be homeless.

[Mental_Alchemist]

All these stories out here with the same theme. Its like cheaters read from the same script. I wonder if any actually watch these videos, read the comments, and think to themselves....damn....I did/am doing that

Probably not bcuz u never see them try try to explain themselves. It's so strange how u NEVER see them give their point of view.

I'm really curious to know what the hell do they be thinking sometimes. My walk away stbxw seems to be devoid of ANY self reflection on her actions, but it's ironic because she is quick to point out any other behavior in others. ... so she knows the difference between right and wrong....she can't/won't even admit that she's just wrong for how she's handling the situation with me and our kid.

Its like These people are in a different dimension or something.

[pezchef]

1st story. OP should give the WW a J.K. Simmons style LOL