The #1 Phrase to Make People Move Mountains For You!

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About The Black Swan Group
Founded and led by former lead FBI hostage negotiator, Chris Voss, the Black Swan Group has 10+ years of experience working with companies and individuals on taking their negotiation skills to the next level. Chris’ book, Never Split the Difference, is a Wall Street Journal bestseller and has sold over 2 million copies worldwide. Our expert team of coaches discuss everything from silence techniques to influential empathy.

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Thanks for watching!

[dameanvil]

00:00 🧙‍♂ The speaker faced a lost suitcase situation at the airport and approached the luggage services office in a positive and playful mood.
1:22 😄 The speaker's playful attitude turned out to be the key to a successful negotiation with the luggage services staff.
3:32 🧳 The speaker described their suitcase's distinct features, making it easy to spot, including loud green color, white duct tape stripes, and their name written in black letters.
4:56 🕵‍♂ The luggage services staff went beyond the usual process, with the woman physically inspecting the luggage conveyor belts to find the lost suitcase.
5:26 🌟 The successful retrieval of the suitcase was attributed to empathy, a positive attitude, and approaching the situation with a playful demeanor.
5:37 🤔 The speaker emphasized the importance of empathy and a positive frame of mind in negotiations, stating that being 31% smarter in a positive mindset makes one a more effective negotiator.

[jeffmejia]

Another wand that has worked wonders for me with anyone at any level: Concept: They're the smart one, They're the expert, or They're the authority who has the answers and the 'know how'.
I simply start by saying in an assured, positive, upbeat voice--"I know YOU can help me." I repeat the words "I KNOW you can." Then state the issue/problem.
You'd be surprised at how far individuals, whom you've just empowered with that authority, will go so they will NOT let you down because you've bestowed upon them an ability they have and you don't. AND you REALLY need their help or you wouldn't be asking!
They will put people on hold, leave their post, spend way more time with you making sure your issue is resolved and their attitude becomes pleasant if it wasn't already. Think about it, if someone came up to you and started off with that phrase, wouldn't you want to prove them right?
Learned this at a weekend Real Estate conference years ago during the session on How to Communicate With People. This was the biggest plus I took from that seminar.

[mzlww]

This isn't really to do with conflict management but I once worked in an airport customer support role. And I learned a very important lesson, perhaps the most important lesson about flying. Are you ready? Here are a the MOST important thing you can do to never have your luggage “lost” EVER again. Don't buy or use a black bag. Everyone has similar looking black bags. The main reason bags are lost and hard to track down (not just on the wrong plane or caught in the sorting area) is because some person has been in a rush and grabbed a black bag that looks like theirs. They are stressed out, in a rush, and going to another part of the airport or an unfamiliar hotel. They grab “their” bag. They rush away before you see Your bag. You see a bag that LOOKS like your bag, but you notice it's not your bag. Now the airport has to track down the 1st person and somehow get your bag back and give them their bag. Use any other color. Buy a bright orange or even a dark blue bag. This also a great lesson a lot of people ignore. You are the source of most of your problems. Others can fix it for you but wouldnt it just be better to not have the problem at all?

[Seantorky]

If I catch myself getting worked up at a help desk I always highlight “ I understand it’s obviously not you fault personally “ seems to be received well.

[dominicst-jacques]

Just wow! Chris, I watched this video and then called my municipality regarding potholes on our street. Other neighbors had tried getting them filled before, to no avail.

I implemented the magic wand and, within 2 days, they were filled.
You’re sharing real GOLD here. Thanks for that

[firfira]

This guy is the GOAT. I like this story format

[specklepattern]

This is a magical video. It made me realize that the stresses and strains of life have completely drained the playfulness out of my days. Appreciating this has made me think about fixing the problem, then made me feel better, and helped me handle some potentially difficult conversations. Many, many, thanks Chris.

[patrickmahan]

I used the Magic Wand line today to get $500 of $600 waived in credit card interest and late fees! Thanks Chris!! 👍👍

[FrostRare]

Why does Chris Voss sound like Al Pacino in _Scent of a Woman_ ?

[oznetyoutube]

Lol, Classic Chris Voss.... I've had my greatest successes with others, while I'm in difficult times, by simply taking a deep breath and offering a sigh of pain and a smile of camaraderie, then asking them to bail me out.

Chris, I love this practical use-case format. Thank YOU.

[LovelyLady]

Right! Just being nice and understanding is the key. ♥️😎🙌🏼

[ReflectionOcean]

Approach customer service with a positive and playful attitude to facilitate better assistance. 1:19

Customize your belongings for easy identification and to decrease the likelihood of them being taken accidentally. 3:11

Express gratitude directly to individuals who have provided exceptional service. 5:10

Consider the employee's perspective and challenges to foster empathy in your interactions. 5:30

[seamustheterrible]

Great video Chris. I love your empathetic approach. May I also add that politely asking the employee’s name personalizes the experience and often leads to much better service / results by creating a bond between you and the employee which creates motivation for success.

[skukipeeshaun]

Just coming from Chris’ Instagram where he told us to come watch this video cos a guy recently walked up to him at the airport and said to him.. Bet you wish you had a magic wand… 😅. Great video. Always learning from this channel and videos!

[Noosa]

I fully agree, you have to have empathy for the people you seek help from and they work much better without added pressure of a hot head speaking to them.

[OGWolfofAI]

It just keeps getting better and better. Bravo Mr. Voss. Bravo. 👏

[CroquiLJ]

Like this storytime format : practical, entertaining and educational at the same time - keep it up Professor ! ❤

[edonismeve]

In first place he used a pattern interrupt, to be playful is the best way to use it and justify the ambiguity yiu created, then you can give suggestions or to lead.... You'll notice people will be more focused and will answsr quicker after a moment of confusion! But just if you did it well... If they're still confused you need to calibrate

[brians]

Ok Chris Voss and the FBI didn't invent communication methods and not the first to make it practically applicable. But him and Dale Carnegie are the best at it.

I have applied both and I work with sick people who have the potential to be violent. The only things go is when I don't use their methods.


Thank you Chris.

[matthewmaguire]

Thanks and I will put that phrase to use… another one that I have found to be very effective is four simple words…I Need Your Help… most human beings, naturally respond to these words with a mix of curiosity and the basic human need to be helpful…When you open up curiosity it is more likely that people will respond in a more positive way… if you are in a management position, these words put the worker on a more even level with you and cooperation may be more spontaneous.🚀