Masculine Modesty: How Can Men Dress More Modestly?

Discover how men can embrace modesty in their daily lives while upholding dignity and respect for themselves and others. In this insightful video, Elizabeth explores the often-overlooked topic of masculine modesty and provides practical advice for dressing in a way that upholds the dignity of both men and women. Learn how to make thoughtful choices that reflect your inner values and support the well-being of those around you.

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Social Media:

[FinalAzimuth-nhhx]

As a youth pastor, I was under the impression that men are visually stimulated and women are emotionally stimulated, just as you said. However, I was shocked a few years ago when I realized how the church is locking girls into staying silent about struggling with pornography and visual lust because we keep repeating this exact statement.

The group was giving our testimonies around a campfire one night and it slowly transitioned into a time of confession as well, finally one girl broke down into tears and said, “This is so hard to say because girls don’t struggle with this, it’s mostly a guy struggle, but I’ve really struggled with pornography for the last several years…” All but a few of the girls admitted that they too were struggling with looking/watching pornography regularly. Most said in some fashion they had kept quiet about it because they knew it wasn’t something with which girls are supposed to struggle. I spoke with a few older women afterwards to see if this was a new thing for this generation and they all said that women are visually stimulated too, but they never liked to talk about it when they were younger because they knew none of the other girls struggled with that like they did. So I asked if so many girls struggle with it why do they think other girls aren’t struggling? Two of the ladies said “Because we’re told growing up that men are visually stimulated and girls are emotionally stimulated, so we feel like we’re the only ones.” I think this paradigm might be keeping a lot of women and girls isolated from the healing that begins with confession.

[diegochipi]

Man here haha. Could we get a video expanding on emotional modesty?

[danwall]

I would appreciate an expansion on the topic of emotional modesty. What proper conduct looks like between the genders when married!

[emilyp]

i agree with the clothing aspects- very minimal but not needlessly showing off your body for men- for example doing work around the yard in the summer it’s fine to take your shirt but going out in public like that, kind of shows a lack of decorum. I think modesty for men is more so in how they act and speak though.

[johnabsher]

I always understood the essence of modesty as simply wearing what is appropriate for the situation

[OPiguy]

7:30 start of the physical recommendations

[petitJohnPIGG-ynnc]

Hello,

I was trying to implement masculine modesty into my own wardrobe about a month or two ago. I am joining the secular franciscan order and was looking for ways to be more modest. It was a bit of a challenge, thank you very much for this video targeting men.

Personally, I felt called to dress a bit more formal and also try to minimize my wardrobe. I agree with you that this might just be one of those issues where men and women are different. Due to how attraction works differently for men and women. I will continue to look for ways to be more modest in attire. While at the same time I am looking forward to your video on emotional chastity targeting men. I work in close proximity with many young women and perhaps there might be more tips there that I can put in place.

All the best!
Viva Christo Rey!

[ladybaby]

One way men can practice modesty in their own home is to not walk around in their undergarments or shirtless and to make sure your sons do the same. My aunt has two boys (both are adults now) and she was constantly exposed to her boys running around naked, in their underpants (which sometimes exposed other parts), and they ran around shirtless. She was constantly exposed to her own sons which made her uncomfortable and when she would speak up about it, my uncle supported the boys and not her wishes. As children, they (my uncle and aunt) allowed this behavior because they were extremely young and it didn't really matter. But as they got older, she realized what a mistake that was but by then it was difficult to break the boys of that habit. "We've/They've always done it so who cares?" was the response. It was incredibly disrespectful.

I am forever grateful that my dad has NEVER gone around the house shirtless or walk around in his underwear. The only time we ever see him shirtless is at the pool, where we understand that it's part of his pool "attire." Even then, though, he has worn t-shirts or tanks in the pool at times. He has always respected his own, my mom's, and his children's dignity. Because of his example, I look for that similar trait in potential partners. So far, I've only dated kind, hardworking, and respectful guys so I guess I'm doing okay!

[whimsicalaubrey]

“Keep your underwear to yourself” made me laugh 🤣 8:22

[HoradrimBR]

Some people mix "modest" with "bourgeois".

A simple hoddie could be as modest as any suit, even more modest - in the original sense of the word - as it's much more humbling to wear a poor man hoddie than a posh suit (even after the Silicon Valley non suit culture, Zuckerberg and Musk 100% wear suits to formal, official, occasions).

A modest person doesn't want to attract atention to himself - for men and women it's better simple clothes than fancy ones.

[daniscarantino]

Seeing so many men post shirtless pics on Instagram - even Christian men. Nothing turns me off faster than a shirtless pic on Instagram😂 (unless it’s within a context that makes sense - like at a lake with the fam)

[simpleisbetter]

I almost always wear a suit to Mass because I want to give my best to the Lord. Sometimes I feel a little self conscious, reflecting on the measure of pride I may be feeling or the attention I draw to myself. I don't want to distract anyone with my attire and I also feel disappointed to see no other with dress clothes but rather expensive house-clothes at Mass.

[sanderpacunayen]

For the other side of the convo for women. I heard Fulton Shean say something like males should refrain from flirting with women.

Not sure if that means ever, or just uneeded flirtation with ladies you aren't committed to becoming your wife.

[BeatMasterPhil]

I’ve always thought that modesty in speech is a big way that men have to very intentional about being modest.

In speaking about our body and sexuality, in general and specifically about another person, in a way that upholds its true beauty and dignity.

This would seem to be a parallel between the purpose of modesty when it comes to clothing, to show forth reverence towards and the beauty of what is contained.

[sara_haines]

Spot on for so many things: the role relational context that can be used to get women aroused that ladies have to be mindful of whole men may not, men's clothing being tighter these days and needing to be more mindful of that so as to be modest, and more Thank you!

[diannalaubenberg]

Women do experiencea certain level of visual attraction. We notice good looking men;

[legsdiamond]

Both men and women are very visual. I don't under stand why alot of people think otherwise

[ROBERT-fdkl]

Thank you for this much-needed presentation. Handsome guys have to deal with girls and women being quite forward in both what they say or what they would like to do. Something like 95% of Christian counsel on this topic is directed towards males only - which is a huge mistake. Both men and women should dress modestly.

[simpleisbetter]

We Christians need more cinematography that captures the mysteries of our faith and create fascinating stories that parable the values we hold dear. Why can't Christians have Sci Fi, action and mystery drama (if it is without curses and sexual suggestion)? Too many Christian films are emotional p@#n, inviting the temptation to resolve deep troubles with finding the "right one"(God is the only right one).

[kristynabrazdova]

At the beginning I think you were refering to something that is called spontaneous and responsive desire. While often men are the ones who experience spontaneous desire and women the responsive one, it can be quite reductive to say that it's always like that. These things that are repeated too often until they become the accepted truth can result in a feeling that there is something wrong with me if I experience something that is not considered typical for my gender. I think that women can be attracted to visual aspects as well. All that to say, emotional modesty is something I've never seen discussed before so it would be really interesting to hear someone's opinion on that.