7 Surprising Things I Learned About MEN as a Matchmaker!

I know it’s surprising that I can still learn after all these years of talking to men and women all day every day. But over the years, I’ve come to understand many things that have changed my mind, educated me, broadened my horizons, and made me more compassionate… Therefore a better coach to both men and women! And I love that I can still be surprised even to this day. Here are some of the, things that I found most surprising over the years.

#DatingAdvice #DatingTips #Matchmaker #Datingcoach #DateCoaching #WhatDoMenWant

Here are some EPISODES you may have MISSED:
You Be the Dating Coach!

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Coffee with Carey
A Note From Carey (me) : As a dating coach for women and men, and a relationship expert, my mission is to have you leave here every week, better for having met me. It may take me some time so please check back (subscribe?) for future for dating tips, relationship advice, first date tips, continued updates on the dating apps and online dating platforms, and many other relevant topics of dating in 2023. If your goal this year is finding love then you are in the right place with the right dating and relationship coach. And if you are over 40, over 50, or maybe even over 60, and just now getting back out there and dating after divorce, as a woman of a certain age, who has years of experience as a matchmaker and dating expert, I think I can be very helpful as your YouTube dating coach. And if you desire or need something more private or personalized, well, you know where to find me! (see below)
Warmly, Carey

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[Wookinpanub]

As a man 100% struck with love at first sight but it was because of the look she gave me .
It was mutual but she said it was my voice that made her turn around and flash her smile.
She made a smart azz remark but the look on her face and smile spoke different words.
She was smart about it because her friends thought she was being
Mean to me but the look in her eye and her smile spoke a different tune.
I was the only one who realized what she did….she was smooth and meant it just for me and I picked up on 😅it.
This is was the catalyst for me to sit next to her on the school bus next chance I got.

There’s a lot to be said about the glance a woman gives to a man.

This was 36 years ago and one of my best memories of her ever..
That look was smooth as melted chocolate.

[debutante_Caribbean_girl]

Really enjoyed this video, Carey! Would you consider doing a video/sharing a perspective on how to let a guy down easy? (Including possible phrasing to use 😊) I've just had a sixth date with a man who I realize feels more attracted to me than I feel towards him. (While assessing our connection, to be fair to him, for the last few dates, I've been steering towards free activities, or mutually sharing expenses/effort). He's enthusiastic & quite gentlemanly, but I've noticed repeatedly that our tastes & some of our sensibilities don't align in important areas. Until now I've been pretty discreet about these differences (maybe I was trying too hard to be a great date!), so he doesn't really know. I want to wind down our connection before he gets really serious, but I'm sure he will ask why. In my shoes, would you explain it to him (which feels uncomfortably like listing his flaws) or just say something general, like 'I don't feel we're a good fit'? How to frame this in the kindest way? Thanks so much.

[bdm]

I was married for 27 years and divorced for 1 before I fell hard for a long time girl friend. After 4 years I realized it just wasn’t working out. One year single and I couldn’t be happier. If you’re not happy by yourself, you’ll never be happy with someone else.

[ivanvarykino]

Great segment Carey!
Thanks for sharing your accumulation of insights and experience.
As a guy, I couldn't argue with a single statement you made 👍❤️

[interestingtimes]

#6. A lot of women will half listen to me, looking for trigger statements. They will then talk over or interrupt me with their reaction to my statement without having really heard what I said. I know men do this too. It takes a lot of concentration to put my reactions aside and really hear what someone is saying. When I find a woman who can really listen, that’s someone I really enjoy spending time with, even if we don’t agree.

[Rebellgentleman]

It takes me longer than just one date to get to know woman and develop any chemistry with her. I put a lot of weight looking for three things:


Is she looking to get rescued? I'm not looking to be anyone's knight in shining armor because of poor decisions they've made in their lives and now need someone to bail her out.

How does she treat people that can do nothing for her? Treating everyone with respect regardless of social or economic status is a high priority for me. If you treat people poorly because they do not meet your social expectations or status in life, I want nothing to do with you.

How do you handle your anger when you get mad, or don't get your way? This is very hard to discern in someone quickly, but is a very important detail to determine whether or not I want to accept someone on my life. If you do not have a mature manner in expressing disappointment or anger, I'd rather not even be introduced to you.

If there is a quick and easy way to make these three determinations in someone upon first meeting them, it sure would go a long way to keep me from wasting time with those I know I wouldn't get along with.

[hump]

I really liked this video…. I agree on #1-men can fall in love easier on first sight… that’s because, in my opinion, guys are much more visual and wired towards physical beauty…

[terrifromm]

He's just not that into you. Yup, we feel it. We do have our answer.

[BillyT]

Very insightful and as a man, all true.

[rodneybosco]

I found your last insight very interesting. My entire adult life, particularly in business situations, I have been able to figure out if I am going to like or feel ill at ease with a person, especially a woman, in a minute or two without fail. I never considered the fact that in a potential relationship setting that might well trigger a false positive. I’ve been married for many years so I haven’t been tempted to test that hypothesis. Still, I’ve always been appreciative of having that sense about meeting people for the first time.

[susan]

I really appreciate this video and information Carey! It's really valuable to have from you!!! It helps me to know it takes men longer also to get over relationships... it takes me a while. 😂

[Caseinpoint]

Is it really love at first sight or is it more like LUST at first sight? 🤔

[stoneagedjp]

Refreshing content. My 2 cents: There are times when you just know you are going to chase someone. LAFS? Good 1st impression? In some cases, it's like a shared heat. In others, it's a conscious recognition of a very desirable characteristic. In others, I have no idea.

[_sniper]

8:45 it's been about 40 years since I dated, but this video tracks well even with my (male) experience back then. Example: I recall being set up on a blind date with my mother. The lady I dated looked attractive enough, but unfortunately she spoke too much about my mother! It led to a kind of cognitive dissonance on my part. That's one of those instances where the attraction literally changes over that one (and only) date.

[elischultes]

I still make a joke at my ex fiancé’s expense from 2000. Even after getting married and now widowed. “This temp of X below 0°F is still warmer than the ex fiancé’s heart.”

[SpeCialeDDoC]

Chemistry? Oh right away. I can tell a woman isn't interested in me right off. 😁

[trolleymouse]

Funny thing is, none of this is hidden knowledge; it works its way into pop culture in all kinds of ways, and a lot of guys will tell women this stuff flatly, but until confronted with it in a way that's impossible to ignore, it never really sinks in for a lot of women.

[Neoteny]

Met my wife when she slid in under my arm and asked me to walk with her coz a guy was creeping her out with his awkward advances. I was more than hsppy to walk with her. She's still there. At my side, i mean. I think that's whats being conveyed in the Bible about Eve being at Adam's rib.

[zoomkatvideo]

>>> Queen bee... lucky shirt... working...

[Antiqueexcavator]

Making out is simply one of the greatest pleasures of life. And it definitely does not have to lead to anything further. It’s a shame as many relationships mature so many couples seem to make out a lot less or even stop completely.